Letter From Whitney's Mother

by breakfast of champions 45 Replies latest jw friends

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  AudeSapere

  james_woods wrote: If there were a way to express grief in a more embarrassing or awkward manner, I cannot imagine what it would be.

  The husband made a similar statement about feeling compelled to give back to the community that had shown so much love for the family. They had not even buried her or had the private memorial for Whitney and yet husband and mother are both showing more concern for comforting the community at large than in taking care of themselves and grieving the horrendous loss of their wife and daughter.

  I don't have his quote, but will try to find it.

  -Aude.
• 

  james_woods

  Well, Aude - I did not mean that the gesture of making a statement was out of place - but the content of the statement by the mother was excrutiating to read.
• 

  undercover

  I really don't find the letter any worse than one from someone who thinks that they're dead loved one is in heaven. How many articles do you read of mainstream religious folks who make statements like, "I know they're in a better place" or "They're up in heaven looking down on us".

  Just a different brand of delusion...
• 

  james_woods

  Or the classic, Undercover - "God just needed another little angel"
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  AudeSapere

  There is 2.45 minute video of the Open House here:

  http://www.koinlocal6.com/mostpopular/story/Family-friends-hold-public-memorial-for-Whitney/CXlzGhiDUkitCOExfnfo_w.cspx

  Quote from the husband: Heichel's husband, Clint, called the reception an opportunity "to give the community a hug" and thank people for their outpouring of sympathy. http://www.oregonlive.com/gresham/index.ssf/2012/10/whitney_heichel_family_holds_p.html

  I still feel for all involved. I think Clint is probably a really good man. Being in the JW religion, though, messes with a person's priorities. And 'service' of others out-shadows taking care of one's own emotional needs here and now in THIS system of things.

  It's not healthy. It's a distraction and it's denial.

  So sad from so many angles.

  -Aude.
• 

  wha happened?

  This whole open house thing just sickens me. I've never seen an "open house" for a memorial and it smells alot like a cover for the fact that a JW, killed a JW in a violent manner.

  I've seen too many memorials over the years and the thought of an open house to the public never came up to anyone involved. It's just sick to me that it became an open house to distract from the facts that this crime occured inside the congregation and that they are supposed to be above it all.

  No one would have questioned a private ceremony. No one.

  This family is still so deep in grief and mourning their terrible loss to notice, they just became an infomercial
• 

  undercover

  "God just needed another little angel"

  Yea, you usually hear that one when a child is killed/dies.

  Another thought I had... usually JWs are pretty quick to criticize people who claim such things as "they're in heaven" "god needed an angel" but if you think about it, they're version doesn't make any more sense. It's actually worse. Okay, so they don't believe their dead loved ones are in heaven looking down on them, but they don't believe that they are eternally gone either. They never face death, they deny it. They pretend the person is asleep and they'll see them when they wake up. Which is worse because they never fully accept the death and never fully grieve. They live their life in a fairy tale of seeing their loved ones again one day.
• 

  mamochan13

  I kind of took the open house as a way to acknowledge the involvement of the community. When "normal" people have funerals for a public death like this, there is generally huge attendance from members of the community who want to show their support, so making a large public gathering would be quite appropriate, normally. And lots of people did show up.

  Unfortunately, they will use the open house as an excuse to preach at anyone who comes. Too bad JWs don't understand that their non-funerals that never have anything to do with the person who has died look ridiculous to people on the outside.

  I think they must be having difficulty distancing themselves from the murderer, although the husband's comment "Good people can be influenced to do something bad." seems to be trying to deflect blame on someone else.
• 

  JW GoneBad

  I think this tragedy testifies to the fact that JWs are starved of truly having a good time in life.

  Let’s see: JWs don’t celebrate Mother or Father’s day, Birthdays, Thanksgiving, New Year’s Day or other happy events. However, when someone is sexually assaulted then brutally murdered by one of your own kind and before your loved is even buried-you have an open house with hugs, kisses and other delights!

  I label that as bizarre behavior!
• 

  Botzwana

  My friend just called me and because I live in Mexico where ALOT of mafia are etc. He said for me to call out Jehovah's name and he will protect me. I asked him did Jehovah just protect Whitney? His response? Maybe she didn't call on him.