Sharon,
I'm at a loss as to put into words the feelings and emotions that come about at a time like this.
The loss you have suffered is much greater than most will ever know.
At a time such as this, I'm sure it is hard to imagine that there is a God that loves you and understands your pain. As time goes by, please remember that this terrible tradgedy was not of God's doing.
The Watchtower organization has ruined many lives, most not nearly to the extent that this event has affected yours. But through God and his son Christ Jesus, the Watchtower will be made to answer for these wrongs.
Time heals, you may never get over the loss but one day it will not hurt as much as it does today. Rely on friends, let loved ones know how you feel, live your life one day at a time. Be assured of the grace of God and the love of Christ Jesus.
You and your family will be in our prayers.
BF