Thanks again, you've given me plenty to think about, I'm sure I'll be officially out one way or another quite soon, I'll keep you posted.
Should I stay or should I go now?
by meat pie 14 Replies latest jw friends
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rhett
However when you do that, you empower them to treat you as they see fit
No you don't. You're still as much human as anyone else. If they try to shun you out in public don't give them the chance. Go say hi. Hey, when you DA you say you're not playing by their rules anymore. One of the rules that you no longer have to follow is the one that says DA'd and DF'd people aren't supposed to talk to JW's. Don't try to back away or anything because you're not doing anything bad. They're the people in the crazy cult and you're normal. Why should you fear anything?
I don't feel like Satan but I am to them.
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SYN
You could always just disappear.
"...the greater will be the beneficial effect, because you get more of the ultra-violet rays, which are healing" - The Golden Age
[SYN], UADA - Unseen Apostate Directorate of Africa. -
Scully
rhett:
Hey, when you DA you say you're not playing by their rules anymore. One of the rules that you no longer have to follow is the one that says DA'd and DF'd people aren't supposed to talk to JW's.
Sorry, but I respectfully disagree with you. DAing yourself is "playing by their rules"; it's part of their policies and procedures; the term makes up part of their jargon. We all know the power that language has in our lives, and especially the buzz-words like "disfellowshipped", "disassociated", "apostate", etc. have a lot of power over JWs. If you really don't want to play by their rules, don't tell them anything. Your relationship with God is none of their business, and they think and want it to be their business. Even if you DA yourself, the "rule" is that JWs are not supposed to talk to DA'd people the way they are not supposed to talk to DF'd people. By disassociating yourself, you play by their rules, which to their way of thinking gives them your permission to shun/psychologically abuse you.
Love, Scully
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Joseph Joachim
Scully, if I was heterosexual, you would be my wife. Typically, I agree with 70 to 100% of what you say.
My advice to Meat Pie is: don't do anything that is irreversible and may have awful consequences, even if you don't see them now. Getting baptized was one of those mistakes, wasn't it? Then why making another one by DA'ing? Your DA letter will only be read by the elders, who won't give a shit; the rest of the congregation will not read it and once they announce you DA'd, you will not be able to tell them why you left. So I don't see how DA'ing helps anyone. By just fading away, you will be able to occasionally talk to some people in the congregation and sow the seeds of doubt in their minds. Play with the enemy by the enemy's tricks, not by their rules.