I feel bad for those that have lost family.
Is Your Life In Ruins Because You Were A Jehovah's Witness?
by minimus 45 Replies latest jw friends
-
BluesBrother
Eleven years on this board has pretty much got my head straight now....
I feel so bad for our Punk of Nice, and others who suffer real big problems due to the effects of leaving. Mine was just a huge cavern of nothingness. I can look back over a totally wasted life where everything that I valued and worked for turned out to be falsehood and meaningless. So many life choices would have been different if I had known that I did not have an eternity of years to live and plan for, just your ordinary threescore and ten.....and the threescore have well gone now
But it is no good looking back , let's enjoy the moment, today
-
sherah
Not in ruins but JWism has severly effected my social life. I've made lots of progress in my life since fading away but still struggle with anxiety and uncertaintly.
-
everchangingworld
I had been regular pioneering since high school, kept going until the age of 34 when I awoke - at the time and for a while after most DEFINITELY viewed my life in ruins because of the JWs.
But, now, I can no longer say my life is "in ruins" because of the WT... I've rebuilt / am rebuilding...
Sure, if it weren't for the WT, I'd probably be at a different place right now, but I realized that dwelling on it was useless. Some people have come out of situations that were much worse than my own, due to all kinds of circumstances, and have come out living inspirational lives.
-
blondie
Never too late to go back to school...see people do it all the time; of course, it's not the same as living at home on your parents' dime and their paying your tuition, food, and transportation.
I see the most pain comes in marriages and raising children in the Borg and then leaving yourself and your children are stuck in the middle.
My husband left with me and we still love each other, no kids. But I did grow up with an abusive father and alcoholic mother. It took me longer to deal with that which I did before leaving. I found the tools that helped me then helped me with leaving the WTS.
-
00DAD
To say my life is "in ruins" because I was a JW would be overstating it. There are a lot of really good things happening in my life right now.
However, my relationship with my family members that are still-in is completely ruined as a result of the messed-up "theology," practices and policies of this cult.
Crazy, the loudly say they have the truth, yet the self-proclaimed leaders can't even figure out what a simple word like "generation" means and they just admitted that for the past 93 years they've been suffering from a case of identity confusion regarding themselves!!!
Oh, but "It's still God's Organization!"
Yeah, right. I don't think so.
00DAD
-
tresdecu
It's funny...I used to think I had the best life. Wonderful wife. Wonderful friends. Amazing hope for the future. etc. etc. - well, it's changed. Still a wondeful wife...realized the friends are conditional. Not sure what the future holds. just trying to figure out what I believe and have some fun along the way.
I don't really think it ruined me though. It is definitely making my life a little more tricky now.
-
problemaddict
So let me preface this by saying I am sympathetic to all here and the various circumstances that cannot all be brought into account on one post. That being said, we are all ultimately responsible for our own decisions in life. Period. I get that our thining and culture manipulate a value system, but people all the time do things contrary.
I personally didn't go to college. Wish I would have but I didn't. I could have if I really wanted to of course. I ended up being able to take care of myself financially better than most. I met my wife in the org, and have a great kid. I love them both. I have some great friends (some still JW's some not). My wife has supported me thus far, and I believe she will continue to do so with love and understanding.
I learned how to speak in front of a group of relative strangers when I was 5 and kept on doing it until recently. I turned skills I learned in overcoming fear at the door into a succesful sales job before opening my own company. I have a sense of things greater than myself and was taught confidence tempered with humility. My parents were good ones, that taght me to care for others less fortunate than myself, JW or not.
There is plenty of bad, and deprogramming. Guilt, etc... But I can't say I would be dealing with any less of those issues if I wasn't a JW.
I don't know, I feel like blaming anyone but me, keeps me from moving forward. You dig?
-
bigmac
@ punkofnice:--- PM me through our private facebook site if i can be of any help. been there done that kind of thing.
-
Honeybucket
I would say No to being in ruins. But my approach to life needs to be torn down and rebuilt. I think it all depends on your attitude and your draw of cards concerning family members. My non-witness family can do as much damage as my non witness family. Ive been teaching myself to think a different way then what Ive been conditioned to think. There is some destruction, but if you take the right steps and not go down the wrong path, a new life can a joy.
Honeybucket