After leaving the WTS have you been left with a phobia about being happy? (page 2)

Xanthippe

Yes Happytobefree I think the crap does play in our heads, whether we hear it or not.

Wha happened , 'Feeling normal or OK in the outside world almost feels like a sin. Like I'm not entitled to feel this good outside of that religion' - yes exactly. I'm feeling really tired this week because work is hell at the moment - lots of new stuff - I suddenly don't feel entitled to be happy again. Thanks for reminding me, it's just conditioning. Maybe it's like a stammer, it comes back when you're stressed.

FlyingHighNow

Mm the problem is, as the shrinks all say, that when you have a trauma all the phobias and 'stuff' that you think has been taken care of pops right back up, which I think it did when my husband died four years ago. But onward and upward, as they say. It's not like starting again, but stress and shock tend to put you back where you were - just for a while. And these things happen to us all.

That's what shrinks are for though, to help you by giving you tools to cope. I am not talking about average anxiety and grief: I am talking about the kind that interferes with your life in a profound way.

Therapy can help so that you have the tools to deal with "the trauma of all the phobias and stuff when they come up." This is the reason that I chose to go into therapy. I told Dr. Julia the first day, "I can't curl up in ball, unable to function, everytime something big happens." I lived with a very painful state of anxiety, constantly, but when something huge happened to me 5 1/2 years ago, I had to take a month off from work because I had a grandchild depending on me. The anxiety would not allow me to work and take care of the necessary things to stay on my feet. Therapy and my therapist have been a lifesaving. When Julia called to tell me that she will have to take December off because she is having surgery, she and I agreed that I've done enough work that I can make it with the tools she has given me and the support system I have built.

DesirousOfChange

You know - if everything is going well the Devil has already got you -

OR............it could be that Jehovah is blessing you.

They have the answer either way:

If everything is going bad, then the Devil is persecuting you to discourage you. (Consider Job.)

OR, you must be involved in some secret sin for Jehovah NOT to be blessing you.

Speak with forked tongue.

Doc

flipper

XANTHIPPE- Good thread. It certainly is an interesting topic, isn't it ? I know being a born in myself and exiting almost 10 years ago at age 44 I had the same struggles as most of us who were in the JW cult a long time or " born-in " - that I had to learn to relax and realize the world around us has many wonderful, positive , interesting things and hobbies to enjoy and that I NOW had time to pursue those interests and hobbies. And feel GOOD about doing so !

In the last year I've taken up playing guitar and writing songs and singing and my non-witness son and myself are working on a new CD which I hope we'll finally get done next spring or early summer. But we are having lots of fun creating music and enjoy just jamming together and releasing positive energy into the music. Something that was within me for years and years that the cult tried stealing away - but I got the last laugh, they didn't succeeed and now I'm enjoying rocking out playing tunes. WT leaders were such bastards. Still are

tiki

wow...oh yeah.............things go good, you are succeeding....and you have this self-sabotage thing come up....and you have to fight it. it is so amazing......i have to tell myself it's okay to succeed, to be smart, to do well....what a horrible legacy that religion left some of us with.

FlyingHighNow

wow...oh yeah.............things go good, you are succeeding....and you have this self-sabotage thing come up

When you start to self-sabotage, try telling yourself, "Don't work against yourself!" That is something I have learned and it helps.

insearchoftruth4

Bro Mr Flipper! I've played alot of a jazz/blues acoustic ryhthm guitar, harmonica in the late 60s middle 70s, its only Rock and Roll but I like it! folk, ballads. Born and raised in S/E Los Angeles, the beaches. Its all comming back now. My daughter especially and nephews inspire me and they ain't jdubs anymore! Thank God!!!......Got some rocking punishing lyrics flowing thru my head aimed at the WT. Just got to arrange them perfectly. Like whole lot of us, we got sidetracked by the WT, Its payback time........Humm, that sounds good.... Thanks for your post....... Peace out Insearchof

exwhyzee

It takes time after leaving the Org. to stop waiting for the other shoe to drop and to realize it's OK to enjoy your life in the present. Eventually you realize that if something good happens to you, it's not Satan tricking you into staying on the broad and spacious road to destruction. The overly religious have always felt more virtuous when they are suffering. Some even think that if you are doing a job and enjoying it, you must not be working hard enough. It's that old Judeo/Christian martyr complex.

Xanthippe

Flipper, your musical creativity sounds great. Everyone needs to do something creative I think. Good luck with the CD.

Tiki, yes the self-sabotage thing, we all have to watch out for that don't we.

Insearchof, 'we got sidetracked by the WT, Its payback time..', I like that, yes back to reality.

Exwhyzee, I agree the old Judeo/Christian martyr complex that we are not even supposed to enjoy our job, because if we do we are not working hard enough - good reminder thanks.

flipper

INSEARCHOFTRUTH- Hey bro, nice to see you are doin' music as well ! Fantastic ! Keep it up. It's very healing . Yeah, the first 2 songs I wrote last December when I started writing songs were titled "Mind Control " & " Sweet is the Freedom " . Wonder where those titles came from ? LOL ! I'm going to do my first ever open mike night performance on December 19th at a local lounge/ restaurant here in my area. I heard they give you about 15 minutes to perform and I'll sing 3 of the songs I've written, hopefully. Looking forward to it !

XANTHIPPE- Thanks, indeed the music has been extremely enjoyable and fun to be involved with. I only wish I had started years before ! but theres no time like the present ! Havin' fun now ! Peace out, mr. Flipper

After leaving the WTS have you been left with a phobia about being happy?

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