I have learned a lesson about that over the years when it comes to "lending" money
to my siblings...consider it a gift. Otherwise you'll just make yourself crazy.
My sister owes me 4000 dollars and wont pay up. Any ideas how I can get it back?
by usualusername 34 Replies latest jw friends
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Terry
My grandfather use to tack up on my wall a three by five card each day with a different saying on it.
"Money loaned to a friend is collected from an enemy" was one of them.
Years later, I sold something to a fellow I had "known" pretty well over the Internet.
I sent it to him by mail and he had promised to send the cash.
Well, he didn't.
He would postpone by a couple of weeks and then another and another.
Then, it had gone on for months.
I stayed neutral and friendly and never pushed.
Finally, I really needed the money and I started to get really angry, irate and righteously indignant.
I wrote a really nasty, name-calling e-mail in which I threated and ranted for several paragraphs.
EXCEPT......
I held my finger over the "send" button and did not push it.
I just sat there....thinking.....thinking....
I deleted the awful e-mail. I wrote a new one.
In the new e-mail I went the other direction.
I told my friend that I had always valued his friendship and that I hoped he wasn't feeling embarrassed because he was currently unable
to pay me. I explained that I believed in him with all my heart and no matter how long it took I would wait and not think another thing about it.
I promise you he mailed me the money within 7 days!
I came ....that....close to going in the wrong direction.
Honest hearted people have a sense of shame when somebody believes in them and they do them wrong.
I appealed to what they call "the better angels" of his nature.
He felt way better and I sure as hell did!
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skeeter1
#1) Consider it a gift
#2) Don't lend any more then a week's groceries, gas, or a utility bill
#3) Is there somethig of hers that she doesn't use that you'd like to "buy" for the money?
Remember, when you lend money it changes the relationship into a debtor / creditor.
Skeeter
#4) Yes, you can take her to court. It's legally right, but perhaps not morally.
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problemaddict
How did she get 4K? Good Lord.
Yeah unless you have something in writing, court isn't an option. Even if you did, it would take more in time and energy than you probably would want to spend.
What you can do? Take it as a loss on your taxes and be done with it. You can write off bad debt after a certain point.
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NewYork44M
Consider it a $4,000 lesson about what happens if you lend money to a relative. I will bet you $4,000 that you will never see that money again...