Bully Held Responsible for Teen's Suicide

by Scully 12 Replies latest jw friends

  • Scully
    Scully

    http://www.canada.com/ottawa/story.asp?id={54EA3EA1-1889-46CB-ACFD-22CC0B0B79FD}

    Teen found guilty in Abbotsford bullying that led to suicide


    Canadian Press

    Monday, March 25, 2002

    (CP/HO)
    Dawn-Marie Wesley of Mission, B.C., is shown in this undated family handout photo. (CP/HO)


    ABBOTSFORD, B.C. (CP) - A teenager who threatened a schoolmate, prompting the girl to commit suicide, has been convicted of uttering threats and criminal harassment in a landmark case.

    A second girl was acquitted. The case, which centered around bullying, was the first time the province has brought schoolgirls into court after a suicide to face such charges. "It's unfortunate that my daughter has to be in the middle of all this. I wish that my family, my community, my province and my country didn't have to deal with this. But we do," Cindy Wesley said after the verdict.

    Wesley's 14-year-old daughter, Dawn-Marie, killed herself in November 2000, shortly after speaking on the phone with friends who accused her of spreading rumours.

    "Now that we have the judicial system acknowledging that what's going on with our youth today is wrong, I think we're going to move forward on this," said Wesley.

    After the verdict, Wesley hugged the teen who was acquitted.
    Both accused cannot be named under provisions of the Young Offenders Act.

    Youth Court Judge Jill Rounthwaite heard the case alone in Abbotsford, a Vancouver suburb in the Fraser Valley.

    Court heard one of the teens say she and Dawn-Marie were friends. They borrowed each other's clothes, hung out and sometimes got angry with one another.

    In her last conversation with Dawn-Marie, the girl testified she didn't mean what she said to her friend.

    Wiping away tears, she said "When I get mad, I yell stuff that I don't mean."

    Later, she said she couldn't even remember exactly what she said.
    She said she made the death threat during the phone call because she believed Dawn-Marie was saying things about her that weren't true.
    She also told court she had spoken to others about having Dawn-Marie beaten up if she continued to repeat the rumours.

    Several girls testified offering similar acocunts.

    But the trial wasn't about Dawn-Marie's suicide - she had made those threats before.

    Prosecutor Wendy Harvey said the court's job wasn't to find anyone responsible for Dawn-Marie's death. Instead, the court was dealing only with a threat to cause death.

    Cindy Wesley said she was satisfied with the judge's verdict.
    She said the case will show teens that they must think before they issue threats.

    "I believe that from Dawn-Marie's experience in her short little life that there has to be a learning. From every bad thing that happens, something good has to come from it and I believe what good will come from this will be for youth all across this country there's a difference now."

    © Copyright 2002 The Canadian Press

  • chezza
    chezza

    Very tragic, bullying can be so mentally trying its no wonder people suicide, i was the victim of a bully at school and i was so terrified to go to school that i wagged alot.

  • VioletAnai
    VioletAnai

    This is terrible but it's an epidemic especially in schools and workplaces in australia! I was bullied at school once and I just turned around and bullied her right back...so I never had any problems again.

    Bullying takes such an emotional toll on boys especially....once again the situation of the world and it's callousness disheartens me.

  • dungbeetle
    dungbeetle

    >once again the situation of the world and it's callousness disheartens me.<

    I and many of us here at JW.COM are part of 'that woRLd and its callousness'...

    AND DON'T YOU FORGET IT!!!!!!!!!

  • Scully
    Scully

    I didn't have time to post any comments about this news story earlier, but I was wondering if the same rationales that led a judge to reach this verdict against a teenage schoolyard bully could be used against JWs who mentally and emotionally "bully" DFd, DAd and some weak or inactive JWs with exclusionary tactics, malicious gossip, and shunning who may become emotionally unstable to the point of murdering their children to save them from Armageddon and then committing suicide themselves.

    Just wondering what your thoughts are on that?

    Love, Scully

  • VioletAnai
    VioletAnai

    Yeah Dungbeetle and I wish that you and I and all the world over didn't have to live in such a cruel, heartless world!

  • Beck_Melbourne
    Beck_Melbourne

    Scully...Everyone

    Just on the topic of suicide...we had a family tragedy which only happened on Sunday night. My partner Andy's nephew committed suicide on Sunday afternoon...he was only 26 yrs old. We got the call at 2am Monday morning...and we have been walking around in a daze ever since. No one can eat, sleep or function properly. The funeral will be on Thursday...it is in today's Herald Sun by the way...his name was Kristian.

    I appeal to you, what do I say to the family?? Kris' parents are devastated...and there has been a lot of blaming and finger pointing. I imagine this must be typical after a suicide...who to blame!

    He had a history of breaking up with his girlfriend many times...and he had threaten to kill himself more than once...and he even showed his girlfriend the paddock and the tree where he would do it. 12 months ago Andy and his brother rescued him from a suicide attempt...however that one was over a break up with the previous girlfriend. When he met this new girl..we all thought he would be okay for a while. How wrong we were.

    Sorry to burden this on you and to interrupt your thread Skully...but it kinda relates to the theme. I have thought about what pushes a person to do this destructive act...is it to escape??? Or is it to punish??? I think with Kris it was a combination of both...he wanted to end his suffering...as he suffered terribly whenever he felt like he was a failure....or whenever he had relationship problems. He also wanted to punish whenever he wanted to hurt someone...in this case...his girlfriend. Sadly....he has hurt his mother, father, brother, sister and other family members in his vindictive attempt to hurt someone else.

    I am angry at his choice...I lack understanding I guess. I cry for his mother...who found his body and who struggled to get the rope down from the tree until her hands bled...I cry for her efforts to try and warm up his cold body. I cry for his dad who is losing control of his bowels and who can't stand up with this overwhelming grief. I cry for his sister who used to scold him for being such a drama queen...and for his attention seeking antics...I cry for her as she weeps with regret and is suffering so much....I cry for his brother who feels betrayed for not being given the chance to help or to lighten his little brother's burdens. I cry for all those who have suffered a loss this way.

    But I am at a loss..what do I say to the parents and family?? My heart aches for them and I hate to see their pain...when I was a JW it was easy...I would share a few selected scriptures and would emphasise the new system.

    Now what do I say?? Help!

    Beck

  • chezza
    chezza

    Oh beck .........

  • VioletAnai
    VioletAnai

    It's impossible to think what is running through their minds when they do this desparate act. Until you've experienced the utter anquish and sense of hopelessness that brings about these thoughts, it'll never fully be understood!

    My heart goes out to you and your dear family Beck!!!!!!!!!!! Your nephew will be in my prayers tonight! He ended what he thought was a desparate situation, but in my eyes he's still alive in your hearts and minds.

    Death is cruel. Even crueler is the notion that we live on after we die, that we can watch our family grow and see their happiness and pain and yet be no part of it, simply watch from a distance! That is one of the most awful things ever taught. If I passed over, I'd be bitching to whoever to change the policies!!!!!!

  • Beck_Melbourne
    Beck_Melbourne

    It is such a difficult situation...I had a belief and I had a faith when I was a JW...it was all so simple to me. Now...I don't know what to say..and I don't know what to believe.

    Kris' girlfriend said she could feel him near her...she could feel him touching her shoulder...if someone had said that when I was a JW...I would have thought 'ya nutta'. But we all have to find a way to comfort ourselves...and a way to deal with questions like 'is there life after death?' What a nightmare this week has been!!

    Beck

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit