by caliber 154 Replies latest jw friends
a dope,I think Moshe used the term dope only in sense of trusting the other person to be fair in working towards a future divorce..post raising children.
If a person is truly fair and understanding why could you not work out the marriage troubles period ?
Doesn't love and trust go hand in hand ?
If a person is truly fair and understanding why could you not work out the marriage troubles period ?
Does fair and understanding mean well matched? Why would you want to go through life with someone who is not your equal? Very empty life indeed. I have a relative who has done this. I think it has made him a very unhappy person.
Does fair and understanding mean well matched? Why would you want to go through life with someone who is not your equal? Very empty life indeed
Does that mean a person was a dope if they married the wrong person ?
If a person is truly fair and understanding why could you not work out the marriage troubles period ?
LOL...I have never heard of a divorce that worked out this way...one person is always angry, hurt, pissed off or over it.
By the time the decision to divorce is made...talk time is over...settlement and negotiation time begins.
And if anyone thinks their kids are happier because they stayed in an unhappy marriage, they are kidding themselves. Kids aren't stupid. Martyrs don't get rewarded with grateful children in this situation. Do your kids a favour, and get a decent life. Show them they can be happy either on their own or in a good relationship...don't teach them to stay in a shit relationship. Is that what you would want your kids to do? To emulate you?
Coming in on the tail end here....
Not an expert on marriage that's for sure,
unhappiness could be a reason for divorce yes!
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What % of failed marriages are unhappy...90% 100%?
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Happines is a strange thing ... not something you can
grab hold of & lock-up so that it can't escape.
It more likely will hang around if it is treated tenderly & a bit
loose!
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To say " I am unhappy & I want out" does not take into
account that this feeling can & will change.
Seems we are too quick at times to give it a chance.
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I'm thinking if two people still have passion for each other,
and value & actually like each other , they stand a very good
chance of regaining happiness!
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But if they never were into each other and it has been a painful struggle
for years then ... maybe it is over! (sd7 post)
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"Being true to yourself "...... following what you believe over what people pressure you to do.... authentic life
Does marriage contradict the idea of being true to yourself and thus in finding true happiness ?
because you get quotes like this...
When you make the sacrifice in marriage, you're sacrificing not to each other but to unity in a relationship. " Joseph Campbell
> caliber ... maybe this is covered by this quote................................> > "if momma ain't happy .... nobody ain't happy!" clarity
if momma ain't happy .... nobody ain't happy!"
clarity
hahahahahahahaha! Now that for sure is true !! Sense of humor is one of the greatest tension breakers !! 
I agree clarity...unhappiness is not the cause of divorce...unhappiness is the end result of an unsuccessful marriage. For whatever reason.
You don't get brownie points for making a crap marriage last. You just look back on your life and think WTF was I thinking?
still
LOL
but very true
I agree clarity...unhappiness is not the cause of divorce...unhappiness is the end result of an unsuccessful marriage. For whatever reason.
So we come back full circle ...what are the valid reasons for divorce then that lead to these negative feelings of unhappiness?
Canada has something called the Divorce Act that lays down the general laws for divorce. The Divorce Act recognizes three main grounds for divorce, which are cruelty, adultery, or being separated for one year. These grounds needn’t all be a condition of each divorce, as just one will justify the need for the dissolution of your marriage.
The main ground for divorce used in Canada is separation for a year because proving cruelty or adultery can prove very time consuming not to mention expensive.
I think it is cruelty to force either one or both spouses to say in a marriage if they don't want to stay. But care needs to be taken to ensure that both spouses and children can survive financially and logistics-wise.
I think if parents are in a liveable relationship, it is better for the kids if the parents stay together until the kids are grown. Kids don't have to have ecstatic parents in order to thrive. Now, if there is constant verbal or physical abuse between the parents or abuse to the children, that's another story.
