All the Single Ladies put your hands up!

mojonogo

Hi, I read a lot on here, and I am still active, I get about 3 hrs a month in service so not really that active. I know there are ones on here shaking their heads at me, I do believe the basic teachings, what brought me to post a thread was a thread that hit home, the topic of dating in the oganization, it brought up a lot of hurt feelings for me. See, I used to pioneer and I basically burned out, I was working Mon Wed Friday Sat and Sun 2nd shift so I could go to the meetings on Tue and Thurs. This meant no real free down time, so I went off the list and then for no real reason people stopped talking to me, so I took some classes and got a promotion where I worked moved out of my parents house cause they were fighting all the time, I remained active getting at least 8 hrs a month in the ministry, anyway, and then all of a sudden, I could almost feel the whispers about the 21 year old single girl who moved out on her own, but I stuck with it, cause I wasn't in it for the people really. Then a cute little 19 year old ministerial servant showed some intrest in me, despite all the wagging toungues, we dated for 3 mos when an elder pulled him aside and asked him if he were ready for marriage, well of course the answer was NO I mean who is going to yes to such a direct question, so the elder basically told him to break up with me, and he did, Then this Bro, asked me for something like a momento or something, and I angrily replied that he didn't deserve it for letting someone make a descion for him. 3 days later he told me he was wrong, but then 6 mos before we were to be married another elder pulled him aside and told him I was moody and that was a bad personaility trait to have in a wife, this time my fiancee told the brother that in his opinion all women were a bit moody and to mind his own business. I just related to that thread so much it was like I wasn't good enough for this brother in everyones opinion mostly because the brother had a goal of bethel, but he never wanted to pioneer and I thought that was a requirement so for the last 13 years I've always felt that people think I'm the one that ruined my husband. Thanks for letting me vent.

finallysomepride

mojonogo

welcome to the forum

i'm not female but am single LOL

mojonogo

Sorry this was so rambly I guess what I was looking for is if any one else had any similiar experiences with others trying to keep them from marrying or dating someone else even in the congregation, when your technically not doing anything wrong. This was over 13 years ago and it still upsets me, my MIL went so far as to tell a car group full of people we would marry over her dead body.

ronwashington

JW's have the most fucked up views on dating/courting/marrying. It's no wonder that people either never get married or get engaged after dating for like 1 month.

Broken Promises

I dated and was engaged for a while as a JW, and the amount of people who put their 2 cents worth in where it's not welcome was astounding!

I'm 43, female and happily single!

mojonogo

Ron I actually agree with that, my Mil told my dh only engaged couples should date. Somehow I'm glad that I was ignorant of some things, My parents came in when I was a teen so I didn't know you weren't supposed to date as a teenager, and I did. I love my husband I really do but I know so many people who are in very unhappy marriages cause they are afraid of being left in the lurch. I so agree with the statement better to never have a relationship than be in a bad one.

FlyingHighNow

This was over 13 years ago and it still upsets me, my MIL went so far as to tell a car group full of people we would marry over her dead body.

JWs can be the worst busy bodies. If you and your husband are happy, just revel in that happiness. If people can't share in your happiness it's their loss. Any of us who married as JWs had to put up with people who were busy bodies.

FlyingHighNow

I'm single now, by the way. And unless someone who can impress me as much or more than the last couple of guys I was involved with, I will remain single. After you've had quality, who could settle for less?

mojonogo

This sounds funny to say but I think me and my dh work because he had a wordly father, and I think it kept him from acting like my over the top, I'm your conscience and mine mother in law. And my parents weren't witnesses for most of my life, as a matter of fact my mom was df'd and is now re-activated but remains inactive, my dad is also inactive they are divorced now.

FlyingHighNow

Ron, I mean quality relationships.

All the Single Ladies put your hands up!

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