Besides working out your beliefs, I wonder if it might help if you have some flesh-and-blood girlfriends?
I'd suggest starting with just one.
- Lime
Being Agnostic is depressing me....
by SkyGreen 68 Replies latest jw friends
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HintOfLime
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flipper
SKYGREEN- The one thing I've enjoyed since being out and not attending meetings these last 9 years is not HAVING to know all the answers about God, Jesus, life, etc. Cyberjesus makes really good points that sometimes our depression can come from feeling we HAVE to have an answer for everything so our life fits into a neat little box. However the feelings you are experiencing are normal for someone newly exiting the Witnesses, so you ren't alone. If you read and inform yourself it may put to rest some of your fears. I highly recommend reading all 3 of Steve Hassan's books. They really helped me to understand how religions can affect our views on everything. " Combatting Cult Mind Control " , "Releasing the Bonds- Empowering People to Think for Themselves," and " Freedom of Mind - Helping Loved ones escape abusive relationships and cults " also has lots of information that will assist you not only in adjusting your views exiting the Witnesses but it has great ideas for how to help your husband who is still a JW. Just my 2 cents. Hang in there, it does get bbetter ! Just keep reading ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper
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wasblind
Whether a person believe in God or not, Life can get pretty dull
if there's no hope in it
Think of somethin' that you would like to achieve in your life
no matter how small and work towards that goal.
Havin' the hope that you will see it through
No more waitin' on the end to come, but enjoyin' this life to the full
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SkyGreen
thankyou to everyone that has replied, i really appreciate it
jgnat, yes I am working on making a few friends outside the religion, its going well so far. im a busy mum though, so i dont get out much! we are moving away to a small town at some point this year, so im going to try and get some sort of mums group together at my kids school once we're settled in. It will be nice to start fresh. Im hoping there arent any JW kids in my kids school! would make life a bit AWKWARD>>> will have to visit our congregation and ask around....
for those that pointed that its the thinking i have to have the answers that might be causing my distress, thankyou. Its just so hard when you've lived your life smugly believing you do have all the answers... and now to have NONE. But I will get used to it in time, just like everyone else here has.
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Ticker
Take your time. Keep your head up and build some supports like friends as suggested. I know what you mean when you say you struggle to fit the OT with the NT and how they can seem so different. I had this same struggle for quite awhile. Luckily I was able to resolve it but I really personally feel that is because of the lack of a proper theological knowledge and the Watchtowers morbid obsession with making God seem like an angry manic depressent.
If you want to keep your faith or at least find out what the bible really is saying I would suggest to reach out to a Church founded in centrally accepted Christian doctrine. They can support you in this transition. When I left the Watchtower I didn't reach out and I regret that. I floundered into agnosticism, atheist, and finally back to believer over close to ten years. I found lots of claims that the creator and bible are bunk were not as honest as they like to make it seem. For example they bring up all these supposed inconsistencies of the bible while ignoring their own but with proper research they can be resolved.
Whatever you decide or if you decide nothing at this time just keep an open mind whatever you do and remember God is far different then what the watchtower painted a picture of. They have ruined so many a persons faith with spiritual abuse and it really makes me so frustrated.
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SkyGreen
unfortunately i dont have the option of reaching out to a christian church, im still "in" although out mentally,
being a fader is so hard!!
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tec
(I'm carrying this over from your comment on Still Thinking's thread)
Love, Skygreen, is a good philosophy.
Love life, sure.
Love one another, certainly.
No one has all the answers. Loving one another, and doing good to one another... these are the sum of the law (natural - as shown through many spiritual philosphies and cultures; and the one given from God to those who do not have that law written naturally within their hearts)
Peace to you,
tammy -
rip van winkle
Hi skygreen- Welcome!
I just wanted to share with you a thread from Randall Watters(Freeminds.org) that he posted here 4 months ago. It sorta helped me to have another perspective and to accept that I needed some time and to "take a vacation from religion" I hope it helps!
"Rip"
Here's the link:
http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/235171/1/Why-Not-To-Forsake-Your-Christian-Heritage
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sd-7
A good thread to put out there. I have struggled (often quite publicly here) on matters of faith and belief in God. I think even if the Bible weren't true, that doesn't preclude the existence of God. I know when I first woke up, I was very much interested in understanding the Bible from a Christian perspective, and at some point I started questioning the Bible, too.
I would say, there's no need to chuck the Bible out the window on account of what the JWs said or did. I think because it's such a terrible wound, there's a tendency to not want religion at all for awhile. It may be that there'll come a time when your feelings change. Though I don't believe the Bible is an absolute guide for life, I do think it can be a useful part of a larger moral framework. I don't believe God intended for us to suspend our logic or common sense or to allow our consciences to be overridden by anyone, if such a being exists.
One thing I thought of, sometime ago, is that the Bible is sort of like snapshots of God's personality. Some things are pretty extreme and others are extremely loving. The real God, I would imagine, would be somewhere in between.
Honestly, faith is just an assertion that you know something. We honestly can't know the ultimate end of man. The way I see it, the search for answers is part of what gives us hope. I was reading Ezekiel 34 not that long ago, and it nearly brought tears to my eyes. Helped me remember that it was the shepherds who did the wrong thing, in the end, and that, how nice it would be if God himself came to look for us and bring us into his arms, you know?
Maybe it was wishful thinking, but...keep an open mind, is all I can say. If belief in God can help you, then look for the good in this world and even in the Bible itself and find God in those ways. That's how I see it. Just don't force the square peg into the round hole, is all.
--sd-7
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yadda yadda 2
You need to find a new human ethic and values based system that is independent of the Bible and religiosity. I would suggest that your human conscience (whether god-given or not) is your best guide, a far better guide than the Bible in fact since the Bible is at odds with universal morality and what is unconscionable. I'd recommend the philosophy of Karl Popper, who basically said mankinds highest moral cause is the elimination of the worst kinds of suffering. Take this and your conscience as a new rich source of ethics and moral guidance, and put the Bible and all religion aside for now, just as you would the Koran or the Book of Mormon.
Morality must be an objective truth for morality to exist. Even God himself must be subject to objective universal truths for moral truth to be real. This is why we know that the Bible is not an accurate depiction of a God who is perfectly moral, as the Bible contains unconsionable and immoral actions committed or endorsed by its portrayal of God (eg, we know that genocidal killing of babies and infants, as the Bible describes God doing to the Egyptians, is never morality acceptable, by anyone, in any time and under any circumstance); and hence why our conscience is a surer guide.
It is too hard to figure out whether a 'god' exists or not, and you should not be concerned with trying to figure it out. What is important is you follow your conscience and build your life around independent and objective moral truths, which are echoed in humanistic values and causes that are targeted towards the elimination of the worst kinds of suffering. This is all that we can do in the absence of revelation or scientific advancement to a level where we can seriously begin to knock on the doors of the big questions, and the human race will not be in that position for a very long time, if ever.
Loving others and the elimination of suffering (from the worst to the least) are our highest purposes as human beings. We do not need ancient scripture to know this.