One of the best parts of leaving the JW religion is the discovery that the majority of people – Worldly People – are kind and decent folk, who are willing to be helpful if given the opportunity to do so.
BUT! Exiting dubs who have been born into the faith are definitely going to be somewhat naïve in certain situations that can leave them open to abuse by cunning perpetrators.
I well remember my first couple of years out of dubdom. I wanted to try anything and everything. Gambling, smoking, swearing, fornicating, drinking, football, racing, hunting, fishing, I wanted to try it all. And did! Some things I stuck with, some things I let go. But I was still inexperienced and vulnerable.
A year after I left the dubs, Her Ladyship and myself were a pair of newly weds who were wanting to enjoy some socialising. I was 27 with a maturity that was more befitting a 10 year old, HL was 20 and well, er, more grown-up than me. It was around this time that my pal Louis invited us to his barbecue on Hayling Island beach, where we met another couple, Bob and Sandy.
Bob and Sandy seemed to take a shine to us, and at the end of the evening we swapped phone numbers so as we could meet up again later in the summer. To my surprise, Bob phoned the next weekend to invite us over to Bournemouth for a day out. We went along and very enjoyable it was too.
We saw them the next weekend, and the one after also. They were very, very attentive, they would laugh uproariously at my collection of tired old jokes. As the weeks passed though, I sensed that their attention seemed a bit put-on, there was something that didn’t seem quite genuine about them both. I was starting to feel a bit uneasy around them by now, as Sandy was always trying to get me into intimate little chats, whilst Bob would keep homing in on Her Ladyship with contrived conversations about social issues. Eventually Bob took me to one side and said “You know what Sandy and I are into by now, surely?” He then went on to explain that they enjoyed swapping partners sometimes, how about it Mike, you game for a bit of swapsies?
I was a little taken aback (Understatement!!!) but do you know what I did then? I actually apologised for the fact that we were not that way inclined! Talk about a lack of confidence!
Well, that was it, Bob and Sandy never contacted us again, and I felt a sense of betrayal. Her Ladyship found the whole episode most amusing, and I too eventually saw the funny side to the story.
Of course, now, years later, I’m a lot less likely to be taken in by those sort of people. However, I just wanted to relate the tale as a gentle warning to newbie–ex’s who could well be vulnerable to the attentions of predatory males / females who could try to take advantage of the loneliness and vulnerability of recently departed JW’s.
Englishman.
