by Kool Jo 10 Replies latest jw friends
Good day:
Just a query....how did growing up a JW impact your views of relationships, in terms of love/marriage?
Were you too gullible, naive?
How hard was it for you to interact with members of the opposite sex?
Were to too "soft"?
Did you feel "forced" into a relationship because you could have someone who wasn't in the "truth"?
How is it for those who are "awake" & still have their partner stuck in the borg?
Thanks for all your comments!
Peace,
Kool Jo
my relationships in the org were completely disfunctional. its hard to have a positive physical relationship because its drilled in your head that sex is bad sex is bad sex is bad and then poof...u get married for the wrong reason to one of the available single men in ur area who has the right "spiritual" qualifications and its ok. sad thing is the sex wears off (if ever was actually any good) and u r left with someone u barely know and dont even like. then ur stuck. there r no other options. my bf now is amazing and wonderful and he is an athiest. i love him for who he is and not because he fits the jw mould.
Here's an altenative view: Sex is good. Good sex is great. Great sex is amazing.
JW teachings on sexuality is like everything else they teach: wrong
That being said, sexuality is like a lot of things. If you drink and drive you might have problems. Drink responsibly.
Sexuality is a gift. Use is wisely. You'll be glad you did.
my relationships in the org were completely disfunctional. its hard to have a positive physical relationship because its drilled in your head that sex is bad sex is bad sex is bad
Dysfunctional is an understatement.
It took about 5 years of marriage counseling to get past that indoctrination.
Doc
"Deaden your members as to what is bad"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>
Now if that doesn't screww you up ...nothing will
clarity
KOOL JO- Very good questions and good thread. Thanks for posting it. I felt pressured or coerced into getting married at too young of an age ( 19yrs.old to my barely 18 yr.old JW wife ) because of the pressure of the WT Society not allowing premarital sex . I think it promotes many young JW's into getting married for ALL the wrong reasons at too early of an age. Then what if you find out you aren't sexually compatible with your mate ? It sucks, too bad- you stay stuck in a bad marriage- that's what .
I found out later in life that a good marriage is a hell of a lot more involved than just finding a good sexual partner. I've been happily married for almost 7 years now to a " never been a Witness " lady and it's a more stable relationship than I ever had as a Witness. One big reason is because the WT Society doesn't come in between us. It's a two-fold cord, not a three-fold cord with GB members , elders, and circus midgets tumbling out of our bedroom closets ! LOL ! If you get my drift ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper
I couldn't even imagine being attracted to those loser brothers when I was growing up, young love is usually infatuation anyway, so all those young folks that knew "sex was for marriage" married the first thing that came along. Some are still together, some or not, a brother I grew up with got married when he was 18 and his wife was a few years older than he was, that marriage didn't last too long.
Relationship advice from the GB and my parents was all wrong. Took me 50 years to get over this mind conditioning.
I also struggled with relationships as a Jw. I never really dated anybody and I just struggled dealing with women in terms of dating but I am slowly recovering.
Did you have feelings of insecurity and jealousy when in a relationship as a JW?
