My experience at the Memorial... (page 3)

misty

It is also much sadder when this shunning affects the younger ones. Our youngest child is finding it very confusing why all of a sudden a life-long friend is no longer allowed to play with him or even talk to him on the phone because his parents DA'd. And to talk about hipocrisy... My husband was inactive and had impartially DA'd a while back. But when I started reading the scriptures and finally understood the grace of God through Jesus, the elders advised everyone that it was ok to talk to him but not me!! So he, officially DA's also and waited for best impact, a week after mine was announced. He was hoping that some of them knowing us well, would start doing some thinking. Nope.

joelbear

While I can give some creedance to not sharing a meal or having intimate contact with a DFed person and I can even stretch to say okay, maybe not greet them in public, you will never get me to understand what in the hell is gained by purposely turning your head away from a DFed person who has humbled themself to come to the Kingdom Hall, quite well knowing that he has been publicly identified as someone who has chosen to leave the witnesses.

He is now back for a visit. Maybe his conscience is bothering him. Maybe he misses his witness friends. Maybe he wants to remember the feel of a meeting at the Kingdom Hall. What possible purpose is served by coldly turning one's back to a person who has made the first small step back toward wanting to be your associate and brother again?

Ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous behavior.

After I was disfellowshipped for about 2 months I went to a Sunday meeting. It was a terrifying experience for me. I wonder how one warm squeeze on my arm or one smile would have changed my life course.

Joel

Yadira Angelini

You guys, I have been warning you! do not feed Yardif; I suspect he is yoyomama, Ernesto all along. He never post to congratulate when someone shows love for one another between us or between our family mambers and friends.

Stop posting back, he is a troll, you guys!

Richie, I admire you courage and I'm with you, hope things get better for you, remember: "time is our best friend". Love and Harmony,

Yadira

MavMan

Yadira:

You are wrong, I am not YADIRF. He is not an active JW and I don't agree with some of his views. You can email Simon and ask him if we are the same person if you don't belive me.

fyi...I read your post on the meal you had with your JW deaughter. I'm very happy that it worked out for you. Chau.

misty

Yes, be kind and start a conversation. That is easy with those that you were just going on service with or associating at the Hall. But what of those that were your closest friends or family for the last 15 years or more and overnight they now have to shun you because they are told that this means life for them. You know that in their heart they also hurt. But they are trying to do the right thing at all cost. Just as one who DA's is trying to do the right thing by GOD. And what of the children who lose a friend and do not understand why? How can you make them understand that God did not require this but their parents are dictating this, because someone else is dictating this to them? Confusing for us, imagine those little ones?
How do you handle one that you dearly love meeting you in the supermarket and have to turn away and pretend they did not see you when you both know they did?

Yadira Angelini

mavman, accept my apologies... I'll just be cautious, still. You know what you did to me, so that explains.. sometimes Yadirf sounds like you to me.. my opinion... Harmony always,

Yadira

misty

Hey Richie: Speaking of shunning. My little one phoned one of his JW friends last nite (although I had repeatedly told him not to do that as it would put them on the spot. - yeah, well my kids don't always listen!) Anyway, the mom answered (my best friend! ex..) and acted as if nothing has happened and handed the phone over to her son. He proceeded to converse as if all was ok. I gather they did not make plans to play or do lunch or anything but it is a start. What do you think? Should I try it too?

Richie

Hi Misty...!
Sorry for my delay in answering you - So your son phoned one of his little friends and got his mother. I guess the mother figured that your son did not DA himself, so he is somewhat still in "good" standing. Although he doesn't go to the meetings anymore, so normally they would start "marking" him also as a bad associate. Another thing came to mind: what if your son mentions the fact that I have contacted you and your husband several times? Just something to think about... maybe the rumour goes around in the congregation that I may be talking to you on a regular basis, so who knows they try to find out more information through your son, but then perhaps not...
I would be curious to see what she would say if you contact her - does her name start with "V" or "S"? In either case, I always found those two more "liberal" in their overall outlook and less hypocritical than others. Incidentally, I frequently receive short email messages from "V" encouraging me to keep going back to the meetings.
Another thing I wanted to mention: Two weeks ago an elder took me aside after the meeting, where we talked privately in the backroom (with the blinds closed LOL) and he said to me that if I wanted to be reinstated, then I could say so or write a letter. He said that afterwards they would check with me whether I am reading the bible regularly and if I prepare for the meetings. I told him that I was already repentant BEFORE I got df'd, but the only thing missing at the time was that I did not attend the meetings for a long time. That was the determining factor when they originally decided to df me - they could not establish my true repentance - even though I appealed the decision once. The only magazine I receive from my daughter is the Watchtower magazine, nothing else - so how could I thoroughly prepare for every meeting? But the point is, that I don't want to be policed around by anybody! What if I do not study and prepare for the meetings? Would this automatically mean that I could not be reinstated, even forever? I am afraid that the answer is yes. So with other words, I will be imprisoned for the duration of my life (or shall we say the "death sentence") because the elders have concluded that I do not read the bible or study before the meetings. For instance, if one is in prison for having a (even slightly different)different viewpoint other than what the WT dictates, one can be sent to "jail" forever. Just imagine if Jesus would be on this earth today and be a witness to these atrocities committed in the name of "pure religion", would he not say without hesitation: "And yet then I will confess to them: I never knew you. Get away from me, you workers of lawlessness."

Richie :*)

misty

Richie: Don't worry about my son disclosing anything. He cannot since he doesn't know anything. He has not talked to that 'friend' since or before then. They will not be allowed to spend any time together in any case. This is N.. she is not returning any of my emails.
I have tried contacting V... because once since my DA she sent me an update by mistake and then sent me an 'oops' saying that she missed 'the Misty she used to know'. I tried emailing back but of course have never heard anything since.

I still email N. and B. etc but never hear back. But I figure that even if they shun me, my loyalty as a friend has never depended on a handful of men. So why should I listen and stop talking to them. So periodically I send them news of how we are doing - only the kosher news of course.

As far as proving that you do your WT homework, maybe just a couple of highlighters and colour up some stuff, scribble a few things in the margins and just pop it up when you enter the KH so they can see. That should keep them quiet - until they give you the green light. Then I doubt that they will insist on it since you will become a royal pain in the butt if you keep doing this everytime you see them! And they cannot prove that you read your Bible or not, especially since you are quite familiar with it. I have a collection of the ministry school stuff for the year, you are welcome to it, if it can help.

My experience at the Memorial...

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