A question for the English (page 2)

Englishman

Aha, this looks like fun, here we go:

What do the schools teach about the American Revolution and England getting its hiney spanked?

We haven't lost a war since 1066.

Do you actually say "The Queen Her Majesty"? or just "Queeny"

We refer to The Queen as Her Majesty the Queen, face to face you call her Ma'am

Does the water over there really suck as bad as I hear it does?

Incomprehensible question, we have the finest spring water in the world.

Do the women have hairy armpits, or is that France? lol

Stupid boy, that's Italy!

How do you view the U.S. and its citizens in general?

Like a boisterous adolescent son

What about Cananda? Aren't they like a "leg" of England?

Canadians are always there, they're totally dependable in times of trouble.

Do all your buildings sink into the ground about an inch every year?

Only after Americans insist that we put in air-conditioning.

You guys going to the Euro dollar?

Nope, just the Euro.

[i]Do they air any American TV shows?

Just that Springer chappie.

[i]American commercials?

No, there are very few American products that are imported to the UK, I have a Bose system made in USA, it's excellent.

[i]Are your teeth really bad or is that a myth? No orthodontists?

Good teeth is down to hygiene, not orthodontists. Most Brits clean their teeth 3 times daily, if they still fall out that's tough, so they say stuff it.

[i]AMerican movies prevail?

[b]Some do, the really patriotic stuff is laughed at, (How many times can Mel Gibson be a victim of the English?) blood and guts falls by the wayside, the most popular American movies are stuff such as "Scent of a Woman", that kind of thing.

Regards,

Englishman.

Nemesis

English guy says to an American: “Do you know where Egypt is?”

American responds: “Isn’t that a small town in Scotchland?”

hillary_step

Larc,

I rarely take exception to something you say, but your observation about tea in the States doesn't ring true to me. I don't know anyone who would drink tea out of a paper or styrafoam cup. We have several varieties of tea in our household and only drink it out of a proper cup. This is true of others I know who drink tea.

Are you of Brtish ancestry? This would clear the matter up rather quickly....lol

Kindest regards to yourself and Mrs Larc, who I am sure is the perfect tea-maker -- HS

144thousand_and_one

Hillary,

I find most of your post to be humorous, but do take exception to your stereotyping of Chinese Americans and association of such folks with "New York pimps." The Chinese have contributed much to our culture and we are fortunate to have them here. Perhaps if your country was more tolerant of other cultures, it would enjoy greater economic success.

Robdar

Hillary:

Thank you for your concern about our tea making ability in the United States. It is alarming to think about.

I hope you worry less about us when I tell you that I would never drink tea out of a styrofoam cup (unless it meant not getting any tea). I know how to make the perfect cup of tea and I don't use Lipton, Tetley or Earl Grey when I do. I also like my tea hot, sweet and creamy. Upon occasion, if I have it, I wil also enjoy my tea time with a bit of clotted cream, strawberry jam and scones.

Hmmm, I think that I am in the mood for a spot of tea right now.

Hillary, the next time you are in the U.S. look me up 'round tea time. We will drink our tea and have a good gossip.

hillary_step

144thousand_and_one,

Actually I hope that my post might be taken in the spirit of humor that it was intended.

I am not English so I cannot claim it to be 'my country', though I spent a good part of my life there and carry dual nationality, UK citizen being one of them.

I have lived in the US and Canada for long periods, as well as a number of other lands and have found that people are really much the same beneath the exterior, so I have no axe to grind for one particular nation or against.

English I suspect is my inherited sense of humor - not to everybodies taste.

Best regards - HS

PS - At the risk of sounding like a 'White Barbarian',

The Chinese have contributed much to our culture and we are fortunate to have them here.

I am really curious as to how the Chinese American community have impacted American Society. The reason that I ask is that I have many American and Canadian Chinese friends who continuously rail against the Chinese community for not getting invloved in the cultures of these two lands but tending to keep themselves rather isolated. Are they wrong? Just curious.

Marilyn

If the English are as smart as they would have us believe they would never have allowed the Watchtower trash into their country in the first place. It was an American religion, laced with American logic and American ego. It seems that no matter how crass or OTT Americans are, we in the rest of the world can't get enough of them. (the latter is known as a back handed compliment to the US)

Marilyn

larc

Hillary,

Regarding my ancestry, on my dad's side, both my grandparents are Scotch-Irish with ancestors who fought in the Revolutionary War. However, on my grandfather's side, they married German women for five generations, from 1755 until 1870. On my mother's side, I was told that they were English and French, but I haven't been able to trace them back very far. My wife's family is Irish on both here mother and father's side of the family and they also go way back in this country. On her father's side, they were Irish Catholic and were among the first Catholic settlers in this country. On her mother's side they were Irish Protestants.

Well, that the story, but I don't think it explains anything about tea. I think the tea thing is just one of many interests and tastes we aquired after we got married.

apostate man

LOL, What a bunch of great replies. Tea? Nah, were coffee drinkers mostly. The Boston Tea Party ended up with the tea in the harbor for a reason. High tax's was just an excuse.

BTW, hiney=butt, buttox, rearend, cheek, ass. What's a blimey?

How about a few word differences.

Your "FAG" is our cigarette. Our "FAG" is a queer.

Soccer and Football.

Anymore?

Nemesis

Apostate man:

Fag/Faggot also means homosexual here [and cigarettes]. I suppose it would sound funny to an American if someone was giving up smoking here and they said, “Oh, I would do anything to have a fag in my mouth and suck on that fag!”

One that does make us laugh is your use of fanny: “Oh my fanny hurts… or he slapped me on the fanny etc.” Over here Fanny is the street slang for Vagina—it’s used just the same as pussy, unless you’re talking about a cat!

Another phrase you find amusing is ‘Lay the table’, no we don’t have sex with the table, it just means lay out the cutlery and plates etc. on the table before a meal.

Some others less funny are:
Sweets=Candy
Chips=French fries [but we also use fries]
Pavement=Sidewalk
Motorway=Highway
Holiday=Vacation

I’m sure there are many more others would like to add.

A question for the English

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