No more shunning from me!

by Dawn 16 Replies latest jw friends

  • Marilyn
    Marilyn

    Dawn, Welcome to the club. It took me years to get to where you're at now. I always break into a broad, wide, warm smile and twinkle my eyes at them. They usually smile back and if they don't then I lavish them with Hiya's and so on. Other times I wear my apostasy like a badge. I had to call an elder recently about a house he was selling so I told him "Oh I am disfellowshipped" with much forthrightness and quickly went on with "how much do you want for your house"? It's a real nack but once you've learned it you keep them on the back foot and they always come off worse than you. Best of all it doesn't ruin your day - rather an encounter often makes your day coz you're so darn proud of your assertiveness and confidence.

    Marilyn

  • DanTheMan
    DanTheMan

    I like your thinking Dawn. I only recently da'd, and i haven't come across any of my former dub acquaintences. But, I'm not playing by their rules anymore. Their gonna get a big smile and "hello" whether they like it or not. Bwuahahahaha

  • Will Power
    Will Power

    Good for you Dawn.

    I love this line..."Love Jehovah's Witnesses. It drives 'em crazy."

    Thats a fact Jack!

  • KD
    KD

    Hey Dawn....

    After I was df'ed many years ago, it was strange because all my close friends were JW's and no "worldly associations" for me to talk to. It was tough going for a while, including hospitalation for a deep depression. I was still young, so I arranged my finances and enrolled full time at the local college. I later joined a college fraternity, (we were just like the movie "Animal House") and made many new friends.

    During my "de-programing" period, I had to learning to face my fears. By the way I was also shy all my life and had trouble looking people in the eye. So when ever I saw a JW, I forced myself to look right at them, smile and say hello. Soon I started having fun looking at their reactions as they ran off. I was actually looking forward to JW encounters!

    I wont't go into details now, but my old college frat house was located off campus in a residential area. I have many funny stories of how we use to torment any JW as they preached on our street!

    So Dawn, look them in the eye, smile, strike up a conversation and have some fun!!

    I hope this helps and good luck.

  • gumby
    gumby

    Quote:...after a few encounters they'll either: (A) realize they weren't struck down by lightning when they showed courtesy, then wonder what all the fuss is about

    This has been the case for me in most encounters!

    Most are shocked that you confidently looked at them in the eye, smiled warmly, and said hello.

    I always get a hello back and even TALK to MANY that know I am df'ed and an apostate in their eyes.

    They expect from you.....especially if you are an apostate.....an evil look or a hatred toward them from you. A warm smile and friendly hello at this point blows them away.

    They see you as DIFFERENT THAN THEY THOUGHT YOU WOULD BE.

    Much of what I said depends upon the person you were PERCIEVED as ....when you were a dub.

    If you were well known and well liked.....the response will likely have much more success.

    Good luck and always remember to show kindness to them as this works best all around.

  • singsongboi
    singsongboi

    thank you, dawn!

    i've handled my occasional meetings with jws awkwardly, even with embarrasment on my part.

    but your post made me think!

    i am not wrong, i have done nothing of which to be ashamed.....

    next time i meet someone i once knew, i will do the same as you!!

    if they call, i will tell why i would no longer be interested in their religion.. etc!!!!

    thank you so much for your post!!!!

  • bluesapphire
    bluesapphire

    Hey Dawn, take a look at my post about an actual experience I had when I used your approach. Keep it up. It really works!

    This is it: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.asp?id=15116&site=3

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