I don't want to be too rude; these men have watched me grow up. Although I cannot agree with how they are going about things, I would like to think that they hold high esteem for me.
JC was formed, without even letting me know!?
by magotan 31 Replies latest jw experiences
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Dismissing servant
"I would like to think that they hold high esteem for me. "
If you really tell them what you think and feel, like:
"I can't go along with an organization that is so...destructive. "
I am sorry to say, they will treat you like dirt. So, it'r really good that you did not show up.
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Billy the Ex-Bethelite
"I'm sorry if I made them cry, I'm sorry if I hurt their feelings."
They haven't really cared about your feelings, so you don't have to feel sorry about theirs. They've chosen to follow a 19th century religio-publishing corporation with a history full of false prophecies and destroyed lives.
"They want me to sit down and talk."
That is so that they can attack what you say and convince you that you've got demunz in yer pantz. Mostly, they want you to listen and obey.
"The tone was of love, so I did feel a bit emotional"
They love the way you used to be a mindless JW drone, and that's what they want you to come back to.
"They want me to fail, and it's honestly it's a sick fantasy of theirs I have no intention of realizing."
They're trying to turn on the post-JW self-destruct mechanism. You are supposed to feel like you've turned your back on everyone that ever loved you, and that your life now has no purpose and no future. But you know better. JWs only are allowed to have conditional love, dictated by the decisions of the BoE. And now you can have purpose and a future, now that you are no longer shackled to WT.
"I don't want to be too rude; these men have watched me grow up."
Haven't they ever seen any JW kids walk away from the KH before? What part of "I don't wish to be associated with JWs anymore" don't they understand?
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Pickler
This is a great way to conduct yourself, you will look back on this one day & feel proud.
you have exited on your own terms, its not how they (the JW) define someone who is DF/DA. In the JW world people are either in, or out, and those who are out can be branded with some label, either apostacy, or immorality or something of this kind. The JW mind does not accept that someone just leaves/doesn't believe.
Their "love" is conditional on you being a JW, so it's ultimately not good enough, you do deserve better.
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Mum
You do not owe them an explanation. The only power they have over you is the power that you give them. You're doing great. There is no need to feel guilty or to believe they "love" you in the true sense of the word. They are not allowed to have genuine love and concern; they are only allowed to obey their corporate masters in Brooklyn or Patterson, or wherever they are.
Welcome to freedom! Live it! Be what you want to be and who you really are. They can't stop you.
Regards,
SandraC
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love2Bworldly
If I had it to do over again, I would not have met with the elders. The only purpose it served was for them to shame me & make themselves feel important. And it was degrading the way they made me come in through the back door after a meeting and wait outside in the bushes until they were ready. It felt weird & dirty somehow. What was funny though is that one elder looked at me and said "Thank you for being so honest" after I said "I just didn't want to do this anymore", and he was disfellowshipped within the year-- I think I inspired him.
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finally awake
You behaved in a rational , mature manner. They really can't stand that. Good for you!
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whathappened
Billy the Bethelitte said it spot on. Don't look back, don't second guess yourself. You are doing the right thing.