Marry in the Lord

Rattigan350

They do not do a good job of exploring why different people stop going to the meetings and make any improvements.

This is a quote from another topic. It reminds me of the May 15 2012 study article about marry only in the Lord, p 4 para7. "If a dedicated servant of Jehovah married an unbeliever, this would be an act of disobedience to God".

So they are mandating that ones marry only in the Lord. Don't people see the problem with that.

What if GM were to say that GM workers can only buy GM vehicles. If ones doesn't then one is disobedient and can be fired.

That is stupid because they should consider why one would be something other than what they design and build; don't they have pride in their own work? Management should ask the reasons for that. People would tell them that they don't have good quality or value or performance.

If they are mandating that then they are not considering what they can do to improve the product to get people to voluntarily buy it. Thus how good of a product do you have if you have to mandate its purchase.

The same with mandating people to marry in the Lord. They are not asking or considering why people are looking outside. They are not trying to improve their product (the people). They just try to reduce demand. And if they have to mandate the one's mate choice, then isn't that saying that Witnesses arent that great of a choice? There are things one can't do anything about; looks and money. we would all like to look better and make more money but can't. But there are many things that they could improve and then people would voluntariliy MOITL, but they don't care. There would be so many more available if they would just ban the AAA club. You know, the Available After Armageddon club, where so many wait to get married, then they end up being too old.

It's like in the Communist countries. The people could only buy products made within their country. They had no competition so the quality and variety of the products were lacking.

It is another sign of a cult to say "If a dedicated servant of Jehovah married an unbeliever, this would be an act of disobedience to God". because who determines what makes one dedicated - baptized? That would be one had to study 2 books from the Society and then get baptized. So if one does not do what the governing body laid out, then that one is disobedient to God.

finally awake

My aunt worked for a Pepsi bottling company. They would get mad if employees bought Coke products for home use. God forbid anyone bring a Coke product to the office - they'd probably have fired the employee. Visitors to the office were required to throw away any non-Pepsi products they brought with them. I know that sounds crazy, but it happened to me when I went there.

zed is dead

I wonder why people don't marry from within the congregation? Maybe because this guy is a "catch" in Jwland:

zed

Kojack57

I did research on that subject and again it shows how the BORG goes beyond the things that are written. Marry only in the lord means to marry another Christian. Doesn't mean to marry only in your own CULT religion. That's what the G.B. want so they can be controlled.

jgnat

A former church of mine followed a similarly strict interpretation of that verse. I watched the results...several "waves" of match-ups of available mates, once the front-runners paired off. The rest quickly paired up for fear of remaining single. There were some particularly bad pair-ups in the rush. A few years later, a rush of divorces.

So I got to thinking. Who is more "unequally yoked"? These couples who are obviously unsuited for each other?

The strict interpretation was unsustainable, as well. Within three generations, the young people would all be related to each other.

I swear that the urge to cast a wider net for a suitable partner is both biological and smart.

tiki

it has led to more miserable marriages...they get married because they can't have sex legitimately without doing so - and they have no life experience whatsoever, and usually are incapable of even supporting themselves - but they have to get married and to someone in the cong or a cong somewhere....and so they do....and they are ill-suited to one another, they don't get a chance to get to know eachother because it is all so hurried along in fear they might fornicate - AND they - the obedient ones - are never ever even alone 1:1 with eachother until after the wedding because of that insane chaperone ruling. no wonder the marriages are messes...........

and all that nauseauting information they hand out to those wanting to marry - to look for spiritual qualities - ie status in the cong. and that means just about nothing except that some kid was born into a particular family that is sitting pretty.

WTWizard

This policy has created many problems. First, what is "in the lord"? This is so vague that you could get it taken out from under you. You see someone, you are under pressure to make that person a witless. At which point, they are "too new" and Brother Hounder denies you permission. At some point, this continues until someone else takes your suitor out from under you. Brother Hounder claims that such person was being disobedient, yet the wedding happens at the Kingdumb Hell anyways. They can and do use this sxxx to close people right out.

Another thing that often happens is people take what they can get, often an abusive spouse. You get race mixing where one person is forced to pick someone of a different race, where they are not particularly attracted to the race or the individual in that way. You might get a white "brother" forced to take a black "sister"--where neither are attracted. While I don't believe in getting in the way if people choose to marry across races, forcing it on people (especially with limitations on choices) is just plain wrong. This is as true with a Jewish person being forced to marry a Gentile, or a Gentile forced to marry a Jew, simply because the hounders are in the way. Such marriages lend to problems that one needs to thoroughly prepare for before entering them, and if you are thrown into such a marriage, it is as likely to succeed as someone being assigned to move to Nigeria from New Zealand.

Any time someone is forced to marry someone simply because that's all there is, regardless of culture or race differences (which create their own potential clashes), you risk getting a couple that is not attracted to each other. And then they whine when adultery happens, or one partner is left without sex. Seems this religion does all it can do to minimize happiness.

Rattigan350

Yes, arranged marriages. While the parents don't specifically choose the mates. The parents choose the mates by limiting them to the congregation or surrounding ones and introducing and limiting and chaparoning.

How many miserable marriages there are in the organization?!

People believing that if they just do the meetings, field service, family study or worship, they will be happy. Well, my car's engine is happy if I just put gas and oil into it too.

But no happiness outside of that.

inbutout

I am new to this forum, still attending meetings but am slowly fading. I was very young when my parents became witnesses and I got baptized at 14 (too young) and have realized after more than 30 years that this religion is not about obeying or being loyal to Jehovah God but really it is all about loyalty to the society and the man made rules. I believe that marrying in the Lord means that someone is free to marry and that everything is legal. But according to the witnesses as long as you attend all the meetings and you put in your time in service and are baptized then you are ok to marry. This flawed thinking has produced a generation of witnesses who are depressed and very unhappy and stuck in a miserable marriage and has produced many many unsuccessful marriages. I find the attitude that "worldy people dont matter cause they are going to die anyway" and the superiority attitude of witnesses and the way that witnesses look upon non-witnesses with disdain and pity, to be absolutely ignorant and repugnant. I am one of the silent majority of witnesses who still attend meetings but wont rock the boat so as not to lose my relationships with family and there are many like me within the rank and file. Unfortunatley the vocal minority have taken over. Back in the late 1980's, I and most of the congregation I was in at the time - including all the elders, attended the wedding of a baptized sister to an individual who was only studying at the time. That would never happen now - What has changed? When did this religion become so pharasaical, so rule oriented? I went to university and recieved my degree and no one seemed to care - now it would be a major deal - I am disillusioned and disenchanted - just like so many that sit at the meetings and assemblies. We kinda know who we are but are silent - I guess in a way I am a coward cause I afraid to say anything out loud.

BluesBrother

WELCOME inbutout.......

We all know what you mean . We have been there and experienced the same disillusionment , and pain...Stay with it. It might get worse but then, it gets better! There is nothing like the freedom to think for yourself

Keep posting here, we want to hear from you....

Marry in the Lord

Share this