by cobaltcupcake 28 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
I got reinstated in '74 or '75....not sure of the exact year. I'm totally blanked out on how I did it. I know that there were at least two meetings with elders (who had known me growing up). I did it only because of pressure from my mother. I faded fast, only went out in the service once, and was blasted for wearing slacks during a Winnipeg winter.
Dont know what I was thinking really, going back..... but when I left for the second time, it took.
Welcome PC- glad you stayed out.
Would you believe there is a Wisconsin prarie chicken festival in 3 weeks?
Pucker up and get ready to kiss some serious elder butt!!
Want to know the difference between a 'Brown Noser' and a 'Butt Kisser'?
Depth perception!
You'll be assigned as a study and go through an extra book or two.
That does not happen until AFTER someone is reinstated.
The letter writing (mentioned by a poster) is that you must make a written request for reinstatement.
1) Attend meetings with studied publications (visible) and sing
2) Submit written request
3) Meet with committee (preferably some or all of those who handled the DFing)
4) Likely face rejection the first time or told to give it "more time"
5) Another written request
6) Repeat and rinse well until they decided you're OK to let back in (your mileage may vary based on your "sin" and how "hard-line" the elders are.
IF, you were DFd from a different congregation (and not nearby logistically), the NEW Cong will have to contact the OLD Cong (where you were DFd) and request them to reinstate you. The Cong that DFd a person has the authority to re-instate or refuse (on some grounds they perceive).
Doc
(never mind)
What DOC wrote about the reinstatement process is correct. I will also add that it also depends on whether your judicial committee actually wants you back. As for the amount of time required, there is no set limit although they usually require you serve a year before making an initial request. That first request is usually denied as “more time” is needed to consider it.
I had decided that I would give the committee one last chance to agree to reinstate me. If they did, I would then quietly fade. If they refused, I had no intention of ever going back to a kingdom hall again. When we met (over the telephone), I was told, “We need more time. Yeah, we know it’s been five years, but we just feel we need more time to decide. We don’t want you to be discouraged by this decision. Just continue to come to meetings and everything will work itself out in time.”
That was all I needed to hear. I simply thanked them for their time, hung up, and not one word has been exchanged since. Five years of meeting attendance and letter writing had gotten me nowhere, so I felt I would no longer waste my time. Since then, I have not been contacted about the possibility of the annual visit elders are supposed to make on disfellowshipped people. It would seem that they are just as glad not to see me again as I am not to see them.
Of course the entire procedure, from convening a judicial committee to making the announcement to the rules for reinstatement, is completely unscriptural. But this has been the modus operandi for decades now and nothing is going to change that. For my part, I realize that getting out of this cult was the best thing that could have happened to me. I didn’t realize this when I was first disfellowshipped and did everything in my power to be reinstated. Now, wild horses couldn’t drag me into a gathering of Witnesses again.
Quendi
Quendi,
I'm sorry for your experience. Obviously you had reasons to desire reinstatment. They are men, and what conclusions they come to mean nothing!
Sounds like you have moved on with your life, and that is good!
Doc
To the above I would add: Have a dated paper trail. MOST elders and C.O.s dislike - yet respect- a paper trail.
If a person has already been disfellowshipped for at least 6 months...usually 12 months....A nice simple handwritten (dated) sorrowful letter sent to both congregations asking "what they want you to do to get back in". (Perhaps mention that when business takes you out of town-you attend meetings elsewhere, you are "sorry", and you made amends to any offended party/victim-if any). Mention some "works befitting repentance"...I.threw away the computer, prayer, study, meeting attendance somewhere, yadda yadda...etc.
It will take a few weeks for the two halls to decide what to do and give you an answer. Then show up here and there for a few weeks. 6 mos later write a 2cd short letter saying you haven't heard back, are discouraged, depressed..then attend meetings super regular for a month or two. Then 3rd nice short letter. I have seen a half dozen people get back in after attending only a couple of months of meetings this way. I have also seen Disfellowshipped who have no dated paper trail... wait years.
If both halls REALLY dislike you..give up, get a life and move on. For those needing family it serves the same purpose.."I tried to go back"..."the Elders wouldn't let me back" "I sent 3 letters and went to meetings"....you are now off the hook, your family will now be mad at the Elders, and you only had to listen to the meetings for a couple of months..!
Really no hard and fast rules. A lot of Elders seek revenge or like to see people grovel. ......What a cult.
