by patio34 20 Replies latest jw friends
As my kids (aged 24 and 22) don't seem the least bit interested in leaving home, I'm thinking of introducing some Bible principals into this house or else I'll never get rid of them!
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some of the NONJW here at work asked if they could try this on thier kids as well to get them out of the house too
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from the ServerRoom
Ye Gods! I've been saying this over and over again!!!!!
Witness kids are schooled in PRETENSE!!!! They are taught
that boring, worthless meetings are direct info from Jehovah.
They are taught that trying to sell magazines to disinterested
people is a life saving work.
Anytime they question this nonsense (the emperor has no clothes,
dad!) they get jumped on for questioning the arrangement.
Worse? You bet your a$$ they're worse!
metatron
I think its a variety of factors.
1. Pressure to be good. Too much pressure simply makes people crack.
2. Artificial Families. A combination of secret second lives and a feeling among many JW parents that cramming their kids in the car 3 times a week for meetings is all the parenting they need to do.
3. Isolation. Being marked as different by the majority of those around you is damaging to most people. Some overcompensate by becoming goody two shoes to get the respect of their social group, others rebel strongly.
Joel
I have to get my two cents in here. Abaddon is totally correct. Most JWs kids raised in it winding up living a double life. The good little JW and the normal kid away from it. Lying becomes ingrained. A necessity. I hated being a JW b/c I felt like a freak. I'm just old enough that when I went to kindergarden and I didn't salute the flag, I'd get beat up and called a communist on the way home from school. This went on till third grade. I couldn't tell my parents b/c they'd say I was being abused for being a JW and that was a good thing.
It got freaky when I realized I would lie about innocent things b/c I was so used to lying since I wasn't allowed to do anything. Now I hate lying but being a JW is was a way of life.
I thought that were more twisted things in the JWs than among the "world." For example, we had a JW kid having sex with both his sisters. The JW boy wanted to have sex with his sister's friend. They were maybe 12 and she was scared. The boy's sister said don't be scared. I'll do it first. So, brother and sister did. Then the friend did. He was 14. This was about 1972.
My JW friend was 18 and having sex with a married man that worked for her father and was friends with the guy's wife. He wanted a threesome and asked me to go. Not my thing. She brought her stepsister. The guy wound up enjoying the stepsister more. The JW friend wound up pregnant. By this time I was Df'd but I took her for her abortion. She hooked up with a JW boy who she had sex with before they married. Today, he's an elder.
Oh, the stories.
curlers
I can VOUCH for that fact.
JW kids are MUCH worse disproportionately.
As a the KH I attended as a child, which had 2 congregations, there were 15 young people in my age bracket (including myself) who all hung out together all the time as youths.
Looking back on their circumstance now?
2 were married by age 20.
6 had children by the age of 20. (2 were the married ones, undoubtedly rushed because of the pregnancy, 4 out of wedlock)
1 is dead.
2 are in jail. (1 was drug-dealing, 1 for murder <gang-related> )
I know of at least 7 of them that got nothing more than a high-school education.
3 of us managed to get a college education and leave the Borg of our own initiative.
And probably the most telling statistic...
ALL of us are DF or DA... NONE remain a JW.
I used to think this was a rarity. Over time I have learned it is not. This is the norm folks. The following generation of JW is severely diminished if NOT EVEN THERE.
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In my own case I was a goodie two shoe's growing up. The only problem with that is that I was not taught any social skills and was too trusting with people. I learned the hard way to deal with non spiritual minded people. Not what the dubs taught me, for they don't teach you any life skills that are necessary to get along in life. I had to learn these skills the hard way. That is fine to talk about being good etc. to get into paradise but the organization has a tendency to be too over protective of the young ones. So its either be a goodie two shoes and get pushed around or live a double life and fit in.
Will
"I am quite sure now that often, very often, in matters concerning religion and politics a man's reasoning powers are not above the monkey's."
Mark Twain
I believe there were two types of JW children when I was growing up in the 60s and 70s -- you had your repressed, artificial, Stepford kids who behaved like automatons and then you had your gangster Satan spawn. I, unfortunately, was of the previous.
I agree, it is an inauthentic life. What is on the surface is not what is in the heart. All that emotional duplicity takes its toll. Most all of the "good" kids I knew have left the WTS -- some DF'd or DA'd. Sadly, some even suicided. Same for the bad kids -- jail, drugs, murder. Sad.
What's a mother to do?
Love, Pete
I agree that JW kids are basically "taught" to lie. If they told the truth about any normal kids activities they would be shunned, df'd or
the dreaded "marking". The sad part about it, most of the ones who stay in the org with their double life but truly want to be a witness can end up being pathological liars and the type who have to continually try to make someone else look bad to make themselves look good..hey I guess thats the jw philosophy after all isn't it.
I believe they are worse.
I know in my own experience. I know the reason why I ended up pregnant at age 18. Instead of being able to enjoy my nice boyfriend in normal healthy environment (movies, dinner, etc.). I would have to sneak at his apartment, behind closed office buildings, etc., because I was not suppose to be dating a worldly guy.
I never wanted to have sex with him. Mainly because I was afraid of pregnancy. But what else is there to do. So after a year of creative sneaking. My nature took over and I had sex and voila I'm pregnant after the first time.
I have a 15 year old son whom I have discussed sex and to protect himself with a condon and that I feel sex should only take place between responsible people (anyone ready to take on the responsibility of raising a child).....well he explained to me that he has had sex and he did use protection and it's something that he did enjoy. But I did not have to worry, because he is respectful of young women. And he was not up to all of the drama it take to get the his girlfriend to give it up. (lol)
Then my brother, who quit going to the hall after he turned 18. Told me that it was much easier getting some from the witness girls, than it is with the so-called worldly girls (and that it cost more).
My youngest sister and I definitely led double lives - I was having sex and smoking pot; my youngest sister was having sex and doing heavier drugs (LSD, some coke)
My middle sister ... well, she was kind of a goodie two shoes - but she moved out at 18 and *gasp* went to college! Then *gasp* married a worldly guy (who I think is gay, but that's beside the point)
Needless to say, not one of us is going to meetings - both of my sisters still go to Memorial and district assemblies. Dunno why. Guilt, I guess.
As for the JW kids we grew up with ... I would say about 1/2 of them also led double lives, I am good friends w/ a few of them now who are DA'd or DF'd. There were a few who were exceptionally straight laced, as far as I knew ... but they have morphed into strange adults.
