Canada Day

by Truth seeker 674 14 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  arwen

  Only in Canada

  1. Only in Canada......can a pizza get to your house faster than an
  ambulance.
  2. Only in Canada......are there handicap parking places in front of a
  skating rink.
  3. Only in Canada......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to
  the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can
  buy cigarettes at the front.
  4. Only in Canada.....do people order double cheese burgers, large
  fries, and a diet coke.
  5. Only in Canada......do banks leave both doors open and then chain
  the pens to the counters.
  6. Only in Canada......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the
  driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
  7. Only in Canada......do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we don't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
  8. Only in Canada......do we buy hot dogs in packages of twelve and
  buns in packages of eight.
  9. Only in Canada.....do we use the word 'politics' to describe the
  process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning
  bloodsucking creatures'.
  10. Only in Canada......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille
  lettering.
• 

  sooner7nc

  Every day is Canada Day around here.

  Happy Canada Day!
• 

  I quit!

  One time my wife and I were staying at a hotel in Calgary. Went to the bar for a couple of drinks. There were four men in the bar sitting at a table with coon skin caps on their heads. I thought this was just a tad odd. I had one of this in the 50s. What was even odder was that one of them kept looking at me. We finally make contact with them and invited them to our booth. It turned out they were medics in the British Army in the 3rd Battlion Parachute Regiment. They bought the hats as a joke. We wound up sitting together for a long night of drinking and telling stories. They were familar with California because much to my surpise they had been to El Centro California quite a few times for training missions. In my expirience no one in there right mind goes to El Centro as a destination. Most people have never even heard of it but apparently the British Army goes there because of the stable weather condition for jumping out of planes.

  I only remember one of their names because it was John Kennedy. He was the one that kept appologising for any of the others rude behavior in front of my wife. At one point I had push one of them and smack his hand away when he tried to grab my wifes ass when she as she got up to go to the restroom. John again appologised for his friends behavior and calmed things down. If found out the reason one of them kept looking at me was because I had a very colorful OP Hawaiian shirt on that he really liked. He asked if I would trade it for his Parachute Regiment sweat shirt he had on. I jumped at the chance and we traded right there in the bar. This was just before the Falklands War of which they were a part and we always wonder what happened to them.
• 

  The Quiet One

  If anybody is going to the Calgary convention/knows someone who is, please go here>> http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/255687/1/David-Splane-in-Calgary-Alberta-July-1st-for-special-talk
• 

  jgnat

  Terms only Canadians know: Double Double. Canadian Tire money. Club Z points. Bob & Doug McKenzie. Clearly Canadian. Ketchup chips. Moosehead. Mr. Dressup. Newfie Screech. Coffee Crisp. Trailer Park Boys. Block heater. Slapper to the top shelf. Du Maurier. Beaver tails. Ron MacLean & Don Cherry. The Tragically Hip. Degrassi. HAPPY CANADA DAY!

  Only in Canada....artery-busting Poutine!