The real reason allegations of child abuse among JW's are not reported

by jeremiah18:5-10 23 Replies latest watchtower child-abuse

  • jeremiah18:5-10
    jeremiah18:5-10

    This is my opinion, I don't have official quotes or official instructions to back this up. What I have is real life experience of having been an elder that was involved in investigating an allegation of child abuse, why we didn't report, why we didn't encourage the parents to report.

    Its simple really, the main reason elders don't report is concern that they may lose their position in the congregation. If you in any way "run ahead" of the society, you will be perceived as proud and arrogant and WILL BE DELETED! The same reason exists for parents of the child, if they report, they are uncovering the sins of their brother and disregarding the authority of the congregation.

    It doesn't have to do with a two witness rule, although this is a factor in covering your ass (position). The only reason even close to being noble is what if the allegation is false and not wanting to heap false accusations on a brother. Once again, as is common in WT land, the consciences of the weak dominate that of the many. The overriding philosophy is, the strong can handle being done wrong, the weak can't.

    The matter I was a part of investigating involved a 13-14 yo teen boy (babtized) that had been babysitting another couple's children. The little girl involved was 2-3. The mother, when giving her a bath, noticed sensitivity, redness, and aggravation around the girls privates. The parents began to search their minds as to what may have happened. The only conclusion they could arrive at was this young boy. They approached us, we formed a committe and investigated. The young boy denied having done anything inappropriate, although with time, he conjectured, "well maybe this could've happened or that couldve happened, but by accident....I noticed her playing with a toy in the bath in that area, maybe that as it."

    We called bethel as directed, we were told thereas nothing we could do but give stern counsel and warning. Also were instructed to hive stern counsel and warning to the parents of the girl not to divulge this info or risk being accused of slander. To trust the "slave" direction and holy spirit and to sue for peace.

    This really left mefeeling conflicted and empty inside. After the closing of the committee investigation, I privately approached the parents and encouraged them to consider going to the authorities for a more professional opinion and investigation. I was very apprehensive to do so, I knew that if the parents were at all offended by my notion of contradicting the directioi from the slave, that I would definitely lose my position as an elder. This weighed heavily on me, in fact I'm ashamed to say it weighed almost as heavily as the well-being of that girl and her parents.

    Idon't know absolutely if the boy was guilty of anything. But that's the point, I wasn't really qualified to ascertain that. Those involved seemed content with the outcome, which made all of us elders breathe a sigh of relief. The thing is, was the little girl satisfied? Will she have long reaching effects from this? That thought wasn't really considered.I'm mashamed to have been a part of this whole sham of an investigation. The whole objective was to keep peace, to save face, and to keep our positions. We were not a shelter from the wind. Those parents chose not to go to the police, they did get counseling, as did the boy.

    personally believe that my experience is not unique and that the factors listed are the overriding and dominant factors considered in every case. There isn't any real concern for victims or their ffamilies. Only keep peace, don't offend the weak, don't soil gods name, and by all means keep our position as elders.

  • life is to short
    life is to short

    From what I have seen as an elder's wife I agree totally with you. I found out by accident that we had not just one but three pedophiles in the hall. I only knew of the first one because my sister dated him or otherwise I would not have even known about him.

    My elder husband never told me that in our congregation book study there were two others. I used to have the whole book study over to our home when it was our turn to feed the speaker and I have had these two pedophiles in my home many times not knowing.

    When I did learn of them I totally flipped out. I was molested myself as a child and I HATE pedophiles, it has caused a huge strain on our marriage over this. My husband when I finally found out told me that he did not know for about the first two or three years we were in the hall himself as the other elders kept it even from him an elder, it was only by chance he knew. One of these pedophiles was holding and taking care of children during the meetings so the mom's could listen better to the meetings and the elders who knew he was a child molester thought it was great. One pedophile even had sleep overs at his home for the young boys in the hall and one of the other elders grandson went to the sleep over with the elder grandfather knowing he was a pedophile. These pedopohiles were not young men either they were in the 40's to late 50's.

    It finally came to a head when one of the pedophiles insisted that he was going to go door to door with us. It was over my dead body. I went to the CO, not the body of elder nor my hsuband but the CO and asked if I truly had to let a man who had raped kids in my car, the CO told me I just needed to get a handle on my feelings and YES I would have to allow it. I totally filliped out, my husband was deleted as an elder after being one for 32 years because I was not in enough subjection.

    Crazy hay. LITS

  • Julia Orwell
    Julia Orwell

    Insane. It's not about justice, it's about preserving the hierarchy.

  • Honesty
    Honesty

    I'll rejoice when God destroys that f**ing satanic cult.

  • alanv
    alanv

    Thanks to both of you for giving these accounts. You know the sickening thing is that if a JW reads this they will just say more lies. Unfortunately your stories are just two of thousands and we can only hope that this destructive sect gets its comeuppance very soon as I'm sure it will.

  • zeb
    zeb

    printed and filed.

  • label licker
    label licker

    He shouldn't have been deleted because of you being in subjection but rather he should have been deleted because he wasn't taking care of you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Farkel
    Farkel

    :This is my opinion, I don't have official quotes or official instructions to back this up.

    Yet, your thread title said this:

    " The real reason allegations of child abuse among JW's are not reported."

    So, you have THE REAL REASON, but the real reason is only your opinion?

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

    Farkel

  • Finkelstein
    Finkelstein

    The true and most viable reason child abuse reports aren't or haven't been issued out toward government legal authorities

    is because the elders have been instructed not to, as well it is the forlorn agenda for all dedicated JWS. to NOT bring

    reproach onto god's earthly organization.

    Which means don't do anything that would openly color the image of the organization openly to the public in any discerning

    way. Pedophilia is just considered another sin of a sexual nature and is subjectively treated as such, they don't see the

    other curtailing circumstances in regards to public safety or to fully recompense those who have been victimized by

    this egregious act.

  • whathappened
    whathappened

    Only today one of our friends who is an exJW child abuse victim told us she is being shunned by lifelong friends because they do not believe that she was molested by a brother in the Kingdom Hall and the elders knew and didn't do anything about it.

    When you are in, you think you are in a "spiritual paradise" and you naturally reject anything and anyone that spoils that view.

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