by butalbee 22 Replies latest social relationships
May I ask why then you are now chosing to become that which you just condemned in your last post?
Your rampant desire to talk about little else but sex can't help but leave the impression there are some serious issues you have in that regard, i.e. addiction. Have you considered getting counselling not just over this but even in your desire to go back into something so wrong as your last relationship.
Find a good therapist Butalbee, it will help.
Kismet
Cheating, nothing but.
What about strip clubs? More then 90% of the men there are married.
Butalbee:
Your ex was probably duped in to downloading a file to get supposedly "free" pictures. Then that program would disconnect you from your ISP and dial the 900 #. It is most likely that wherever he downloaded it from did *not* say anything about the charges for using the new phone #. It is like a computer virus. I hope you were able to get the offending program off your computer.
b_ster
Your rampant desire to talk about little else but sex can't help but leave the impression there are some serious issues you have in that regard, i.e. addiction. Have you considered getting counselling not just over this but even in your desire to go back into something so wrong as your last relationship.Find a good therapist Butalbee, it will help.
What one person considers to be an "addiction," is considered by many others to be a blessing. Is there such a thing as too much sex? No, as long as it isn't causing you to live in a cardboard box behind a shopping center. Even then, as long as you're happy there, it's fine!
Therapist? I think so, but not the type presumably referred to in the above quote. Butal needs a therapist with a very "hard" approach, one that will satisfy her heretofore insatiable sexual appetite. A professional license is optional.
I am celibate and single---s do not have the foggiest --- I am addicted to my webtv and all other stuff like eating food--it ia hard for me to be judgeeeemental -- I think I will let GOD do this one !!! peace
Depends. Flirtation is a natural part of my personality, so I am always ready for a giggle. 'Course there's a line that I wont cross but no way am I going to act as though I'm shrinking violet either.
So I am happy to say " Hi sexy legs!" without regarding it as an act of adultery.
Anyway, it gives Joelbear a zing.
Englishman
Flirting is flirting. £@%^ing is £@%^ing. Porn (from piccies to live naked ladies or men dancing for your enjoyment) is porn. Three different things, whether they are IRL, on the 'phone or online.
£@%^ing someone else is cheating, unless you have an open relationship. By £@%^ing I mean sexual activity, as in activity that is sexual. Doh. I do think there is a difference between doing it online and IRL; Lilac, you say your friend is just as hurt... nah... I think she'd be even MORE hurt if it was IRL.
Flirting may make your partner angry or sad because of their insecurity, or may be taken so far by you that it would make the most relaxed person annoyed. There's innocent flirtation "Heya sexy legs, you look great in that" "No, your tits are fine, don't get a breast job", etc., and there is flirting with intent. Innocent flirtation is or should be fine. Flirting with intent is nasty.
Porn... well, it really bothers some people. I think people who object to their partner ever looking at porn 'because why should they do that when they have me at home' should just get over themselves. Obviously if it's a question of never being able to use the PC because it's sticky and surrounded by tissues, then ball busting is reasonable. But some porn here and there? God, rather that than sport or war movies.
Butalbee, I don't think you're a sex addict, I just think you need £@%^ing. Completely natural. If you were a sex addict, then you'd be getting £@%^ed, as that's what addicts do. Calling you a sex addict is like telling someone who talks about drugs a lot a drug addict. Hmmmm. Non sequiter.
Just because someone is horny and likes talking about sex, and because they are horney lust after the last bit of action they saw does not make them a sex addict. I hope you find a nice bloke or blokette to move your world.
Abaddon, you've got it together, I like how you put things. I agree with everything you said.
Butalbee, if you have to hide it from your mate or it causes them pain and you still do it, it's wrong.
I have an open marriage and we discuss this kind of thing with each other all the time because we don't want anything to hurt the other. We enjoy our "freeness" but we also love and respect each other more than we want to "play" with others. Of course, some people are not as open sexually and would gasp at the sight of nudity on the net and just ban it all. If you're married to someone like that, chances are you knew they were like that to begin with. It would be up to you to try and encourage more sexual openness before going to someone else for something you're lacking.
My husband thinks you're sexy by the way.
Anne
it is not cheating if the other person knows about it, that is how we view it in our relationship, keep it honest and open and there is no cheating,
"we do not see the world as it is,
we see the world as we are. . ." Anais Nin
It is only cheating if you are both in the same zip code.
