I hope I have not fully screwed up, it seems like my friends whom I have told my true feelings realy, really, deep down inside, love me, and that's why they have not gone to the elders. Also probably because they know that I love them and would NEVER tell them something if I wasn't 100% convinced and knew that it wasn't true.
I guess I can tell you a bit of my story so you can help:
I just started fully grasping the TATT very recently. Definitely, breaking up with my last girlfriend was the catalyst... I remember praying to Jehovah that if I lost this girlfriend I didn't know what I was going to do... looking back, I think He (God, Jehovah, Jesus, I don't know...) listened to me and answered my prayer in a way that most JW's would see it as Satan himself answering the prayer... I learnt the truth about the truth. Somehow, some way... it hit me like a wall of bricks... to really start investigating... I think that, for most people, CoC is a must-read. It does have the "ring of truth"... I have lived in Mexico and I clearly remember a brother explaining about the Cartilla... then it turned to researching JWFacts.com's statement about "Jehovah" not appearing in the NT. I think that what helped me was to actually see things in the WT Library... I haven't stated this in the forum, but even though CoC is an excellent book, It didn't help me as much as JWFacts because, even though I believe Raymond Franz a lot more than the GB, I cannot (and most JW's can't either) personally confirm anything he says because very few people are/have been of the GB... who knows? Maybe all they do is play poker inside those meetings... maybe Raymond invented some stuff...you know what I mean? (Of course, I think he is really telling the truth about the matter, but what he says can only be corroborated by experiences similar to his within the organization)
It is much, much different (for me, at least) to actually confirm all the crazy stuff said in the publications. I love going through the AJWRB website and confirming that the articles are actually in the WT Library CD, or the 1969 quote where "face the FACT that you won't"...
That being said...
I am an only child, myself and my parents live in Canada. The rest of my family is scattered all over the world. Here are the people who know my current situation:
My GF: Knows me the best. She is a JW but it was ridiculously easy to convince her of TTATT (don't ask me how, she just accepted EVERYTHING, in like, two seconds, and now we both laugh at all the BS)
My father: I had for the previous two or three years been reading the Bible. A couple of times I had moments of cognitive dissonance, telling my dad, "dad, every time I read the Bible, I find that it says things that are waaay different than what the Society says"... He never commented, just said to keep reading. About a month after knowing TTATT, I finally confessed to him privately that I thought this wasn't the truth, and I spilled everything to him: how the NWT was a changed Bible, how there were so many texts that proved Jesus was God (or at least, many more than the opposite way), etc... I asked him to think about WHY I was telling him this, did he think it was easy for me to tell this to him? I asked him, Why does the Society say that apostates are prideful? What, on earth, would I have to gain by telling you exactly what I am telling you now? My father is currently, slowly, convincing himself of everything I have told him. I have to learn to just give him plenty of time for him to digest things and to actually verify them for himself.
I am sure that, if I now showed him all the blood doctrine changes and what they actually mean, he will slowly come out of the WT. He has already stated to me that I have good points, that he sees what I say to him as truthful, that he loves me and doesn't want to lose me, and that he feels like he should back down from being an MS because he cannot defend his beliefs any more. I think he is suffering right now from heavy amounts of cognitive dissonance, while at the same time trying to keep the family together. In any case, he will be a matter of just chipping away at the cult mentality. I think I can win him over. I just have to learn to give him some time...
My mother: Almost totally in the dark. She kinda knows that I have different viewpoints than the WT, even warning me of apostasy, but mostly she does not know the full extent of what I think. She would INSTANTLY send me to the elders to DF me, and it would be a massively horrible cry-a-thon and scream-a-thon if she found out my real viewpoints. It is really hard for me to think of ways of increasing cognitive dissonance with her. She instantly has the cult mentality safeguards go up, even when she herself thinks 'other ideas'... Even when I told her, very simply, "did you know, that the word "Jehovah" never appears in any of the NT manuscripts"? She freaked out and said, WHERE does it say that in the Society's publications? (I didn't know at that time about the Insight reference, unfortunately. I only knew of Appendix 1D, which says it very indirectly)... She said, "in any case, there is a reason why Jehovah allowed this translation"... My mother is going to be one tough nut to crack (no pun intended lol).
Friend A: A person who has studied for around two years, I showed him the changed Bible at Hebrews 1:6, I showed him other things... He believes me but still goes to the meetings... He has been really open and has said that if the things I say prove true, he will stop going to meetings. I am sure that he can be helped, he is still open-minded. He asked me why, if there were some really smart people in the JW's, why they hadn't reached the same conclusions I had. I told him to read Hassan's books... It's pretty much impossible to come to these conclusions with the information filters of the WTS...
Friend B: A person who was a week from being baptized. She cried when I told her some of the things... she was bitter that she had been lied to... told me she had prayed for "a sign" as to whether she should have gotten baptized or not. we had a discussion over coffee. She married a born-in JW, has two small kids with him. He sent me a menacing message on Facebook telling me never to talk to his wife again, and to get "help" from the elders. Apparently he hasn't told the elders because I know stuff he has done... Unfortunately, only two weeks later and she is telling me herself to get help from the elders. I repeated to her all the things, and when she replied to me with the canned response from the elders (oh yeah, we've had false beliefs before... here's a picture of the old WT with the cross. However, we don't hide our past beliefs), I told her (after laughing at the stupidity and ignorance of that statement) that it was a fallacy. Things are slow with her, and I think that I should really change my strategy to work from the blood issue rather than the "they changed the Bible" issue... since once I do that, I have to explain WHY they changed it... and we get into a mess...
Friend C: A born-in JW. Not the brightest of the bunch, not dumb either. I had posted a message on FB that intrigued her, and she asked me what was the important thing that I knew that was so troubling to me. Then I told her about the changed Bible, and then about the Jesus is God understanding that I have. She told me the same canned response: go to the elders. I said, if I do that I will be DF'd... she said, yeah you are right. Don't worry, I won't tell anybody. You can still talk to me, but please, do not tell me any of this stuff. I am happy as a JW and think it is the truth, and it is a way of life for me. Then she blocked me off FB, and then she unblocked me. So far so good... but I am definitely not talking to her about the subject again... too risky...
Other non-JW: I have told non-witness friends and family. Some are shocked at the witnesses and their beliefs, some are shocked that I do not believe in the witnesses any more (weird!!), most have pledged to support me and help me whichever way they can. (I am glad to know that people love me for me out there in the world). I have started talking again to a long-disfellowshipped relative of mine. It is sooo refreshing to talk to him again!! He promised he wouldn't get me in trouble. (He's been out for a while and apparently never wants to come back ;)
Other JW: I have only hinted at things to other friends and family who are JW... I have been trying to comment on things that will increase cognitive dissonance at the meetings: any Bible contradictions, any really deep Bible stuff (like for example, showing people that you CAN review the actual manuscripts online), etc... Most don't get even 1% of what I say... =(
I just hope that some will... and I recognize how many hundreds of seeds of cognitive dissonance it took for me to wake up... I hope that others can wake up too...
ILTTATT