I used this in my child custody battle and gave it to the judge, mediator, and two attorneys. To my surprise the judge said he was grateful and "learned something" when he decided the case. I ended up with > 50 percent custody (total time) of my two daughters. I patterned a lot of it of the "Normal Life Cycle" in the Western Culture. I wanted the judge to understand my game plan.
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An Education Mode l To Building Bridges With
Children Of Jehovah ’ s Witness . A Modular
Approach .
An education model could help children of Jehovah’s witness to experience a
balanced and fulfilling life. This thesis is based on:
1. Education of a Normal Life Cycle of the individual and family.
2. Education through story telling and life experience.
3. Education through positive self talk, goal setting, and thinking about things that are desired.
4. Education RE: pleasing personality, positive mental attitude, and definite major purpose.
5. Education RE: strategies of achievement.
6. Recognizing one’s gifts.
7. Using a “Team Approach” to educate children of jehovah’s witnesses.
RATIONAL: The children are the life blood of the Jehovah witness (JW) organization.
Without the ‘born ins’ and education through isolation and control the JW organization
has nothing. There is nothing inspirational about a ink printing magazine and largest
tree killing company known to modern man. This may have worked in the 1950′s when
there was no educational material to speak; and teaching a kid to read or write was
attuned to anointing their head with oil. That doesn’t work in this day and age. There is
nothing awe inspiring about a 1950′s building or a big logo from the 1980′s on the side
of a building. Nothing there to take your breath away.
The governing body is a group of 80 and 90 year old men spending their days
discussing issues of dis-fellow shipping and new ways to threaten the jw masses with
loss of family and total destruction. This just doesn’t have the same appeal that it once
had.
The governing body: These are not men of rocket science. These are not men of logic.
These are not men of inspiration. They do not feed the good in others. They feed the
fear and guilt. They feed the isolation and control. They feed the anger and frustration
that goes along with being poor and losing your family if you don’t follow the rules of
nonsense.
There is good and bad in jw’s isolating their children and making them dependent on
the parent for all forms of stimulation and learning. The children are inspired by this
type of attention. They are inspired by being the center of the parents attempts to
isolate them. They are inspired by this mindset; because it works. It is effective; BUT it
can also be used to educate gifts that will actually help the child to build relationship,
build friendship, and interact with the world in a fulfilling and textural manner:
1. Education: The Normal Life Cycle of the family and individuals in the western
Culture involves increasing levels of independence. The normal life cycle of the western
culture involves ultimate “Launch” of the children in to independence. That is
considered “Normal.” in the culture in which we reside. Western Culture is not pushy in
this regard.
The normal life cycle of the family involves increasing independence as a child grows
and develops and learns new things.
The children have relationship, they build bridges with other classmates, they go to
each others house, they go to events of significance and memory, they have other
siblings, they have many relationships, they use technology to further these
relationships, they converse, they email, they text, they watch programs that are
creative yet challenging to culture, and language, and expectations of experience.
These are impaired and (for the most part) forbidden in the jehovahs witness
household.
The normal life cycle of the family involves dating and eventually starting one’s own
family. The normal life cycle of the family involves an “empty nest” on a part of the
parents. It involves increasing independence in later years for the parents as a part of
discovering their own interests. These are generally delayed, impaired or do not
happen in the jehovah’s witness household.
The normal life cycle involves plans for retirement when possible. It involves trying to
improve one’s position in the world through relationship. It involves improved socio
economic position through cooperation. The life cycle is impaired at this stage in the JW
household.
The normal life cycle does involve taking care of the elderly when they get sick or are
unable to take care of themselves.
Interruption to the normal life cycle can come in many forms. It can come when a child
moves back home. It can happen with illness or injury. It can happen with trauma or
death. It happens with caring for another unexpectedly. It is effected by many many
things.
For the children, It’s all about independence and increasing independence which is
generally the expection.
Having a gold standard of “Normal” life cycle to compare children of jw’s will have a
clear picture. This could help children understand expectations of society and allow
direction and perspective.
2. Strategies for educating through story telling and life experience. Educators
need to be identified and a strategy of working together to target children of jehovah’s
witnesses. It could be teachers, guidance counselors, it could be a gym coach. All of the
educators could work together with a plan and approach. It doesn’t have to be a state
mandated educational goal from a state buracracy. it could be incorporated with parent
teacher conferencing, it could be volunteers at school. Everyone can work together on
this goal and dream through a mastermind alliance. It will work and it is very possible
to totally educate children of jehovah’s witness to eradicate fear and bullying “mentally
diseased” ideas.
Education strategies to date have been mis directed towards educating jehovah’s
witness directly. This falls on deaf ears as there is no desire on a part of a jw to interact
socially or constructively to build bridges.
Many strategies just further the isolation and control of the jw.
Dialoguing one’s own life experience is a powerful teaching tool. Especially when one is
angry or upset. If an adult can dialogue to the children about their experience and their
thoughts at that moment of anger and fear. That can go a long way to helping the child
understand why parents are angry, or lash out. Telling the story about how you grew
up and the experiences you had can help a child understand and thrive to no end.
Above all. Don’t be afraid to tell your story. Don’t be afraid to risk with talking to the JW
kid. They need that help. and they need to hear that perspective. they need to
understand and learn to challenge their fears. They need to understand that challenging
fears one by one; and they go away.
Build bridges with the JW kid. Reach out to them by being a friend and questioning you
when they put you off. Reach out to them with a positive spirit. With a kind word. With
a vote of confidence. reach out to them by questioning them and telling your story if
given the chance. Get them involved. Help them in any way.
3. Specific targeting through positive self talk, goal setting, and establishing
direction for one’s life.
Marc Victor Hansen and Anthony Robbins speak in great detail about goal setting,
visualization, and establishing a definite major purpose in life. These skills can be
taught:
Marc victor hansen says that we need to write down 101 goals. The act of writing them
down drills them in to the sub conscious mind and allows us to work on them.
Anthony Robbins is a success coach that works with athletes and anyone who wants to
perform at high levels. He is a phenom on visualization and self talk. He would say
anyone can have success with the right self talk and visualization. These skills can be
learned. These skills are entirely counter to everything taught by the jehovah’s
witnesses. but the children can be taught to use this aspect of the mind.
Creative visualization alone could make all the children immune to thoughts of poverty,
ill health, and fear of criticism. Creative visualization alone could make children immune
to the extreme psychological manipulation of the elders and parents. Creative
visualization alone can help you hit a home run when everyone in the congregation
wants you to fall flat on your face.
4. Education RE: definite major purpose, pleasing personality, and positive
mental attitude. Napolean Hill speaks of having all your thoughts feelings and drive
attached to a definite major purpose. When you back thoughts feelings and emotions
with action it creates a powerful force to achieve your desires. A pleasing personality
and positive mental attitude will help you arrive at your destiny.
Coaching children of jehovah’s witness to “think about the things they want “ and “don’t
think about the things they don’t want. Coaching them to “think about, talk about,
dream about, the things they want in this world.”
Help these children set goals. Coach them through the process. They will resonate
with the pleasing personality. They will vibrate at a high level with positive mental
attitude Don’t bore these children but show them in the ways that you interact with
them. Don’t give up on these kids. They need the help of the entire community. Tell
them frequently how proud you are of the. Say it in a manner that they know you
mean it. Tell them how grateful you are for them.
5. Specific strategies for achieving one’s definite major purpose in life, once
establish. Take these jw kids under your wing. Be a part of their socialization
process. Encourage your children to play and dance and sing with these kids. Make a
special effort. Plan things. Invite them to parties. Invite them swimming. Invite them
to play on a daily basis. Just letting them interact with other kids. If they are isolating
themselves. Ask them about it. If they don’t want to participate ask them about it.
Coach them that they can choose to participate in this world or they can choose not to
participate in this world. the world does not really care. The world will pass by the kids
who do not want to participate. The experience will be gone. the learning will be
gone. Everything matters. All learning experiences matter. They feed on and
encourage other learning experiences. These kids need some coaching to develop their
social skills that they are just not geting from their parents because their parents are
not capable. Their parents are trapped in the cult. It’s that simple. they will lose thier
families if they participate in some issues of community or if they break bread with
apostates. That’s sad. But it’s reality.
Get everyone involved with these kids: family, friends, neighbors, school teachers,
ect ect ect. They need special attention. THey have special needs. Give it to them.
6. Recognizing what makes one’s heart sing.
Learning one’s gifts can happen by observing what makes your heart sing. By observing
what makes time not matter. what makes you lost in the moment. What excites you.
What you prefer to do. What you do because it’s fun and not because of what
somebody tells you is fun. Those are the clues that will lead you to your gifts. Those are
the clues that will help you find what is easiest to excel. Many of the most successful
people and inventors in their field do things out of love of what they do and not
because the money is there, or the fame, or some form of fortune. They do it because
they love to do it.
In the case of inventors, Sometimes doing the wrong thing until you run out of wrong
things to try will lead you exactly to the answer to your question. It’s as if you ran out
of wrong things to try. This was true in the case of Henry ford. this was the case in the
invention of the incendescant light bulb.
7. Using a “Team Approach” to educate children of jehovah’s witnesses. I think
one has to walk thought the entire process with the children. There can be input and
teaching from a variety of sources. In fact, the more sources and learning experiences
the better.
These kids need help from parents, neighbors, school teachers, counselors, coaches,
friends on the street, acquaintances, any and all. These kids are at a social
disadvantage and they need your help. They need a variety of experiences.
These kids especially need their parents to demonstrate social skills and develop
social relationships but they are not going to receive this. They need your help
instead.
Normally a child will display anxiety in direct proportion to the extroversion of the parent.
These children are not going to have parents that display extroversion. They are going
to need other means of breaking down the walls inflicted by the jehovah’s witness
organization.
Thank you for making the effort to examine my work.
Best,
Reference: "An Education Model To Building Bridges with children of Jehovah's Witnesses"
http://www.scribd.com/doc/98212851/Building-Bridges-With-Children-Of-Jehova-%E2%80%99s-Witnesses
