Do they intentionally love-bomb?

Xander

I've seen this term used a lot (love-bombing) re: new JW studies. The implication is that this is some kind of nefarious WT strategy, but, the more I think about, the less I agree. At least, it's not an INTENTIONAL strategy, I think, just something that happens that works to their advantage (getting new recruits in).

I grew up as a JW. It seemed that, whenever a new person started coming, everyone DID start talking to them, taking them out in service, going over for meals/inviting them over, etc. But, was this as a result of some sinister GB plot?

Actually, no. In fact, it was because we were bored to tears with all the other people at the hall and were desperate for new people to talk with - for an 'approved' breath of fresh air. (Can't associate with worldlies, after all, they'll just lead you away [8>] - of course, they DO )

The second reason we 'loved bombed' was because we wanted them in OUR clique. EVERY hall had cliques - LOTS of them, and when a new study started coming, there was serious competition to get them in YOUR group of friends. It seems so stupid and trivial now, but that was all their was to life.

I honestly don't think anyone involved in the 'love bombing' was really thinking theocratic war strategies...'if I can just convince him we love him, we can get him baptised', et al.

Honestly, looking back, it almost seemed a cry for help. Like in all those movies where a group of people are being held captive, and a new prisoner is thrown in - everyone runs up to see them (is he the one? Will he be able to save us?)

Xander F
(Unseen Apostate Directorate of North America - Ohio order)
A fanatic is one who, upon losing sight of his goals, redoubles his efforts.
--George Santayana

og

Everything you're saying is true... but it's still love-bombing. After all, your average rank and file Moonie has similar thoughts.

Whether or not there is someone at an upper level intentionally directing the technique is an interesting but irrelevant question; a classic cult indoctrination technique is being practiced, perhaps with good intentions by the love-bomber.

"Belief is the death of intelligence." R.A. Wilson

moman

How many talks came from the platform on making new ones welcome, starting a study & remember, "Jehovaha's people are a happy people."
I'd call that or(castrat)ed, maybe subliminal, but orcastrated!
Happy..happy..happy, damm it, were happy!

HyTech

I don't know if they intentionally love-bomb or not. In my case, there was certainly a lot of attention given to me when I started making appearances at the hall. I was dating this girl (who is now my wife) and she was a witness long before I met her. Anyway, she was counseled about dating me and basically told the elders to mind their own, so to speak. Well, I did get kinda interested in what she was telling me about God and the witnesses and everything and I started going to meetings with her. Everybody was super-friendly. We started getting invited to dinners, lunches, graduation parties, etc. We were definitely being love-bombed. This went on for about 6 months while I was studying. I truly thought I had made some really good friends. Then my wife's sister decided to throw us an engagement party. All of our new friends were invited and it was going to be a good time. (I must mention that I was also going through the baptism questions at this time and was 1 more meeting away from getting approval). All in all, we must have invited 50 people from the hall to the party. NOT ONE OF THEM SHOWED UP FOR THE PARTY! The reasons given by each and every person was that they did not think it would be appropriate to celebrate our engagement because I was not yet a baptized brother. This should have tipped me off right then and there about my new 'friends'. Anyway, me and my wife are both out now and have 2 wonderful kids and are happier than ever. BTW, none of our old 'friends' have even seen our children nor expressed an interest to do so. So yeah, I would say they love-bomb, CONDITIONAL LOVE-BOMB.

detective

Additionally, don't you get "perks" for showing luv (aka love)? Isn't there added incentive for love-bombing in that you get to count your time with unbaptised ones?

Xander

Right, the arguments made are valid.

You DO get to count time witnessing/encouraging unbaptised members.

You DO get counselled to 'welcome new ones'

Happy, happy, happy, etc.

But, c'mon, most of us were in the bOrg at one time. When you found yourself greeting some new guy coming in the door, were you really thinking "I feel so good applying the society's counsel to greet new ones".

Or, were you thinking "This guy looks cool, maybe he won't go all glassy eyed when I start talking about Quake".

Or, when a new lady walked through the door. Was it "GREAT, I get to count more field service time witnessing to a new one".

Or, was it rather. "HOT DAMN, she's about 10x as hot as any of the sisters here, I wonder if she has a personality to boot, or if she is as mindless an automaton as all the sisters here" (at the time not realizing the 'mindless automaton' status was acquired by BECOMING a 'sister here').

(Obviously, switch gender of new visitor depending...)

Xander F
(Unseen Apostate Directorate of North America - Ohio order)
A fanatic is one who, upon losing sight of his goals, redoubles his efforts.
--George Santayana

Francois

From what I remember, during the service meeting or book study, we were quietly informed that so-and-so was bringing someone of "good will" to the public talk on Sunday and to be especially friendly to this new person.

As far as I'm concerned, this constitutes the "intentional" part of your question.

The fact that everyone did it cinches the argument.

Yeah, it was love bombing and it was done in three KHs I was associated with over the years, KHs that were separated by hundreds of miles.

It was subtle, no one said "love bomb" but that's what it was. No one says "sell WT publications" either, but that's what it is.

Francois

og

Also, xander, there are plenty of non-cynical "true believers" who probably are thinking something like 'my loving conduct will help them to recognize the Truth, even if I actually am more than a bit repelled by their personality and body odor."

"Belief is the death of intelligence." R.A. Wilson

QUEENIE

THANK YOU so much about explaining the so called love-bombing --- VERY INTEESTING to finally have early kid JW days explained to me and how I never quite fit in not in any clique CUB and when I just so much as tried to just converse with any young bratha they were told if they continued even talking to me the sistas would with hold the ever lovin nookie...SOOOOO theocratic they were--must put this in my book girls -- you know who you were CIRCUIT #7 SOTHERN CALIF. early 60s I DO HAVE A GREAT MEMORY after allll !!!

Xander

even if I actually am more than a bit repelled by their personality and body odor."

LOL!

Alright, I'll give you that one. I'm sure that happened more than once.

I mean, the talks said 'love bomb new members'. And JWs loved bombed new members. These facts aren't really debateable. I don't think, as a rule, though (there obviously being exceptions, see above), that there was a connection between the two events.

I guess, the litmus test would be: what would happen if the platform stopped suggesting 'love bombing' tactics. If a new person came in(without a grating personality or unusual olfactory presence), would the bros and sisters still greet them and try to become friends/get them in their cliques?

At least from the JWs I knew, I think they still would.

Xander F
(Unseen Apostate Directorate of North America - Ohio order)
A fanatic is one who, upon losing sight of his goals, redoubles his efforts.
--George Santayana

Do they intentionally love-bomb?

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