Need advice: Witnessing to a JW at my door

by Faithful Witness 43 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Faithful Witness
    Faithful Witness

    I am so glad to have found this great resource. I was led here by a link from an article at jwsurvey.org.

    It is refreshing to find so many positive, yet varied opinions and experiences from the people here.

    Black sheep: I have already shown my hand, I'm afraid. I was not confrontational, but as honest as I could be. I expressed my genuine concern for him and his family. It didn't seem to dissuade him, but instead made him more eager to come back with his wife. Unless he is completely daft and deaf, he could tell I was an opposer. I am a concerned citizen. Maybe when he got back to the car, and told them the things I said, he was warned more about me. But if he's been doing this for 30 years, he must have met someone like me before... ?? I really like your ideas, and will use them. I have a hard time keeping my feelings hidden though.

    ABibleStudent: I was never privy to many of their insider guidelines. Maybe his Seeming anxiousness to leave, had to do with the fact that it was just he and I on the porch. Maybe that is why the people in the car were craning their necks so hard to watch us and trying to get his attention? Or was he late for a lunch date? Either way, it is a relief that I won't have to invite him into my home, without a female along. That is a good rule.

    Lois: I have no idea how that picture got on there... and I see nowhere to edit it. Haha. Sasha is a good puppy! Her mere size makes people think twice about messing with our family. The only drawback is that our packages sometimes get delayed during the holiday season, when UPS and FedEx hires temporary drivers. I think it was mentioned in a comment on jwsurvey.org, that witnesses say theif numbers are growing, when they are actually shrinking.

    Snare: Thanks! I am afraid that it's too late to turn back now. He already knows where I am coming from. I do feel a deep compassion for these lost souls, being forced out to wander from house to house. I'm sure there might be some, but I have yet to meet a JW follower who has ill intent In the ministry work. They sacrifice so much, just to be abused and rejected. It is disheartening to hear people when they talk about the response they get. A video I saw recently, linked through either 4witness.org or 4jehovah.org, had several ex-JW's speaking to a group. One woman said something that just broke my heart... "In all the years that I was out going door to door, not one person tried to witness to me!" The process of mind control is very powerful. Your brain and nervous system are actually pliable and adaptable. It is not the fault of innocent ones, when they become trapped in this Strict religion. This man in particular, being an immigrant, was probably so susceptible and easy to "teach." The JW's came to my door with a simple question... "Do you want to learn more about the Bible?" Heck yeah! Come on in... the way that God has orchestrated this whole jw affair in our family, is amazing. As soon as my restriction is lifted, I am going to post my story. Thanks for your kind encouragement. You never know who is arriving at your door, with doubts already in their mind.

    Fernando: great points! I will try to keep it simple. Maybe tackling the new light and the misinterpretation of the prophecy in Matthew, is not the best place t start. Hahaha!

    I Have so many issues I want to ask about... It is going to be hard to pick just one.

  • ABibleStudent
    ABibleStudent

    Hi Faithful Witness, You can always start a new thread to ask more questions. If you are afraid of exceeding JWN posting limits, just wait another day and you can start posting again. If you want to find posts that you have written, click on your name and then select "Topics Started" or "Topics Posted on" on the top menu bar to locate your posts.

    Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

    Robert

  • Faithful Witness
    Faithful Witness

    Ok, I've been thinking and praying about this guy and what to ask him when he comes over. I'm replaying some of the statements he made to me, in his attempts to throw me off course in our conversation together.

    Two issues are standing out for me.

    He was tring to make a case for the need of a Jehovah's organization on earth. I'm forgetting now what he compared it to, but he did use the "feeding many out of the hands of a few" As his example.

    Another thing he was taking a stand on, is the LOVE, the unparalleled love that exists within the JW organization. He emphasized Jesus's command to love God and love your neighbor.

    I'm thinking that these two arguments don't really hold water, when you combine them. I don't see love coming from the GB.

    How can I phrase my questions about this, to this couple, and inspire them to think for themselves to get an answer? I see evidence of lots of things coming down from New York, but i wouldn't call it "love." How can I ask this question in his language?

  • ABibleStudent
    ABibleStudent

    Hi Faithful Witness, You first need to get to know your bible conductor (at least two meetings) as a person (what does he/she fear, what makes them happy, etc.), read Steve Hassan's book(s), and establish some common ground rules for the Bible Study (even if it is in your mind only). Also, you might want to learn how to use http://www.biblegateway.com to help you quickly locate versus in the Bible.

    When my former friend setup a bible study with a brother for me, I only agreed to as long as the brother did not bring any WTBTS propaganda with him and used only the Bible. The brother would skip around the bible and cherry pick versus to attempt to prove the WTBTS's doctrines that people need to be guided by an organization. The bible study only lasted two meetings, because I started to feel that the brother was trying to indoctrinate me and I was not prepared for when the brother tried to change topics when I was refuting the WTBTS's blood doctrine. Like I have said before I wish I had read Steve Hassan's books before doing the bible study.

    In hind-sight I feel that I should have let the JW feel that he was in charge and only ask simple, open-ended questions about what the JW said. I should have let him use the Bible Teach book and be prepared to ask simple questions that contradict what is written in the Bible Teach Book. The rules that I should have established early on are that I prefer to read the NT because I want to follow Jesus Christ's example, read an entire chapter to understand the context of a verse in a chapter to slow down the WTBTS's tactics of cherry picking verses and changing topics when a JW gets stumped, discourage a JW from changing topics when they get stumped, and have some sizzling comebacks for standard WTBTS's platitudes that JWs are taught.

    To counter "Jehovah needs an organization on earth", ask your conductor "Were the Pharisees and Sadducess the leaders of the Jewish religion and represented Jehovah on earth? Why did Jehovah send Jesus Christ to earth when he had an orgnization on earth that represented him? What did Jesus Christ (and Jehovah) think about the leaders of the Jews (see Mt 23-24)? Where in the Bible did Jesus Christ say that Jehovah need an organization on earth? Why was the Holy Spirit sent after Jesus Christ's death (use Biblegateway to quickly find the scriptures)?

    To counter the unparrellel love in the WTBTS organization, ask your conductor "What is the greatist commandment and the second one (search Mathew with Biblegateway)? How can you justify shunning JWs/exJWs who no longer believe that the WTBTS is Jehovah's organization on earth with the two greatist commandments?

    Best wishes with your reverse witnessing.

    Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

    Robert

  • Faithful Witness
    Faithful Witness

    Thanks, Robert. I like your advice and understanding. He was quoting that passage in Matthew 22, when he was at my door. I've updated my Bible. Gateway app, and will make myself more familiar with it. Ive been reading the freedomofmind.com website, and do plan to get the books mentioned, although possibly not in time for the first meeting.

    Do you think I should agree to the bible teach book? Or just ask questions about current articles? i need to try to focus, or maybe should set a time limit with the excuse of an appointment or even have someone show up or call me at a set time To get me out of the situation.

    I don't think he will be able to indoctrinate me. My husband is planning to be present also, so that will help focus the topic if it sways around in the JW habit of flipping thru the bible or a publication.

  • ABibleStudent
    ABibleStudent

    Hi Faithful Witness, The WTBTS teaches JWs to use the Bible Teach pamphlet to indoctrinate potential recruits. Using that pamphlet also will help you because you will set a limit of about an hour for a bible study and want to start at the beginning of the book. Try to cover less than 5 pages per study and research what will be covered so that you are prepared with simple questions and/or selected scriptures to cause seeds of doubt. Ask lots of questions such as how does your bible conductor feel about something in the pamphlet and about scripture(s) that counters what the WTBTS references.

    Be prepared for JWs to lie or deceive you. An elder use to tell me that I was not of the right heart/mind to understand bible mysteries and actually said that JWs do not shun family members or close friends. You will need to think of comebacks for such types of thought-stopping platitudes/tactics. After several bible studies having WTBTS publications handy may help to catch a JW lying, but I would refrain from doing that until a JW starts to express doubts. Showing a JW that he/she is lying to you, may end your bible studies permanently.

    Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

    Robert

  • jhine
    jhine

    I will add my prayers to those that are already , I am sure, being said for your next meeting .I cannot add any advice as to how to procede because I tend to go bull at a gate when I have Witnesses at my door and need to learn to keep things simple .

    When things are so obvious to you it is really hard to understand how the other person can't understand what you are saying ! Of course what I fail to get is that the JW does not WANT to understand .

    The point brought up about destroying faith altogether in an individual is really valid , that seems to have happened to so many people on this forum . I was asked the question by a man as he walked away from my door "where else shall we go ? " and I think that maybe he asked it because some of the things that I had said had hit home .I regret now that I did not shout after him "to Jesus " That is what they need to hear .

    God bless your effort Jan

  • Faithful Witness
    Faithful Witness

    Thanks for all the encouragement and prayers this week. I'm pretty sure the JW couple is going to come tomorrow sometime. As it looks now, my husband will be at work. I've been thinking and thinking about this next meeting all week long, and I'm going to trust the Holy Spirit to guide me, and keep a hand clamped firmly over my mouth when necessary.

    I'm considering a totally different approach, and treating them like human beings. I am going to see how much I can get to know them as people, and hear their story. After all the things I have read on this forum this week, I am realizing that being a JW is not the simple and breezy life that they try to make you believe it is. Being JW for 30+ years, I'm sure they have some stories to tell. I'm going to see if they let me get to know them better. This could give me some insight into what might reach them.

    I ran into our most recent Bible teacher two days ago, and even though questions were burning inside my head, I could tell this man really just needed someone to listen to what he'd been going through. Health problems and unmanageable pain. I didn't get to it, but would love to see how the people at his KH have been treating him lately. It's obvious he can't go in FS, and maybe can't even sit through meetings. Anyway, that's a differen conversation.

    I'm wondering how this new one will respond if I show interest in their story. Thoughts?

    In any case, please pray for me tomorrow. I hope to plant a seed of doubt at the very least, but possibly begin an ongoing conversation with this JW family. If I have to become a bible student, we will see how far that ends up going. One visit at a time, one step at a time! I can do this, hopefully without screwing it up royally from the get-go.

    Thanks for all the help, and I'll be checking here to see if anyone has any last minute advice...

  • Ding
    Ding

    Most likely, their "story" will be about how great the Watchtower organization is, how they want to live forever, etc... in other words, their usual witnessing approach.

    One approach you might try is to ask them to teach you right out of the Bible -- Romans, say -- without WT literature. After all, the Bible is inspired and the WT isn't, right? You might mention that in Acts 8, Philip taught the Ethiopian right out of the Bible.

    They probably won't do it, but it should trouble them that they aren't able to do it.

    If you let them use the Bible Teach book, ask your own questions and give your own answers rather than following the parroted answers studies are expected to give to the canned questions.

    Also, I am sending you a PM. Click on the little envelope in the upper right corner. If you get an error message, do it again.

  • jhine
    jhine

    Getting to know THEM is great , so far they have been part of an organisation , cogs in a wheel . Jesus talked to induviduals and spoke into their needs , treating each person differently .

    May the Lord bless your endevour . Keep us posted and maybe I will learn .

    Jan

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