...it is not the first time I did this but from time to time when I get frustrated I tend to say things I later regret, like this.
She went to the meeting this past Sunday and apparently she heard a talk about watching her associations. She told me that she was glad to have that talk because the message was timely for her. You see, the Saturday night prior she and my kids were at her sisters house and her sister and friends suggested that she hang out with them sometime. Now my sister in law mostly hangs out at other people's house drinking and partying and my wife said she did not want to be a part of that. Okay, I thought, whatever she wants to do as long as it is not too over the top or causes her to forget she's married, etc..
The next point she made was concerning me and my posting here. Evidently, I am an apostate which I have to remind her that an apostate is a person who has left his or her religion. Since I was never a Jehovah's Witness nor have I formally renounced my faith in Christianity, I am not an apostate by the biblical or even dictionary definition of the word. I am an apostate by association with you all who are apostates of the Jehovah's Witnesses. It is so hard to get her to see the reason on this when she is stuck on the whole guilt by association fallacy and the loading of the language redefining the word apostate to apply it to me.
But I did finally come up with an example that I thought would help her understand. If I am an apostate, she is a cultist. I asked her does it matter that I can redefine the word cultist or cult and apply it to her? If correct definitions matter, right? I proceeded to tell her that she has been saying lately that she wants to be more herself and less like the person she hangs out with, less a social chameleon. As long as she participates in this religion she will told what to think, what to do, and how to act. She recently threw a party for our little 3 year old and I cannot tell the world on facebook what a wonderful job she did (and I noticed she gets questions about the event from her mom). She responded with, "So I guess my job is a cult then." "Perhaps," I said, "the difference is what would happen if you leave your job aside from the obvious loss of pay. Would your mom still accept you if you left your religion? If you can say yes, you're not in a cult."
I think it got to her for she went silent. You see, when she says she does not want to be a social chameleon, I sometimes think she refers to her putting on masks at the hall.