Here's a bit of back story on my dealings with this nice man, who I will call Sparky:
http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/248936/1/An-elder-called-me#.Uk4YKIami6M
http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/249982/1/Getting-serious-for-Julia#.Uk4ZD4ami6M
It was very interesting to hear from 'Sparky' how vicious the congregation has been in their gossip about me...APOSTATE!!! He told me all the nuts and bolts of how he's been treated by the BOE and why. I told Sparky outright there were things I wouldn't say to him because he's an elder, and he said he'd choose my friendship over being an elder. We talked for nearly an hour.
Turns out I split the body of elders earlier this year: half were for disfellowshipping me, and he and two others were for leaving me alone. The others turned on those three, including the CO. Sparky had gone to the CO with genuine concern over how the elders had treated me, you know, concerned that because of some idiots a nice person had left 'Jehovah'. A sister about my age developed some sort of active grudge against Sparky and started slandering Sparky to anyone who'd listen (even me after I'd left when I ran into her one day at work) to the effect his children were allowed to leave school illegally, which was not true, and the elders sided with her and didn't believe Sparky. He told me he's '30 centimetres' from being stepped down as an elder, so please Julia, don't tell the elders I'm saying these things to you...
He is disillusioned at the pharisiac and boys' club attitude of many of the elders. He became an elder because he really wanted to help people, but now he sees the elders harming people rather than helping them. He sticks up for the little guy, which has caused the big guys to turn on him.
I told him how I've been shunned and slandered by over a decade's worth of friends. He was stunned.
I told him about the vicious comments I've received on Facebook. He was stunned.
I told him that the WT says Jesus is only the mediator for the 144000 whereas 2 Tim 2:5 says Jesus is mediator for all. He had to agree with the bible.
I told him of how my disabled JW friend and the active JW old lady with lung cancer who is shunned (not by me). He was stunned.
I raised some questions about the AGM and new light. I could hear his cognitive dissonnance ticking over.
He mentioned the last days and 1914, and I raised some historical facts about famines and diseases being much, much worse before the 20th C, and asked, "If you could live in any period in human history, which one would you choose?"
"Um...this one...I like this one..."
He told me I should go back to 'Jehovah', but in another congregation because our [his] one is horrible. I told him, saying, "I say this to Sparky the friend and not to Sparky the elder, they're hypocrites."
He agreed that there are many hypocrites, then trotted out 'human imperfection'.
And we spoke a lot as friends too, about family and holidays and that. I've not had that from a JW since I left, except for the one JW of the conscious class.
It was actually pretty exciting, because Sparky told me things he couldn't say to the JWs, even his pioneering wife and daughters. He needed a friend who would not judge him from the JW bench. He even mentioned how 'Snake' is nothing more than a collection of WT quotes, with no real understanding of Christianity. He said the CO is a 'boy' like although a man of about 43, he never grew up.
I hope I've given Sparky a lot to think about, and he's already thinking for sure. That's why he wanted to talk to me. It may take years, but I think Sparky is on his way to learning TTATT. He's going to 'serve where the need is great' overseas later this year, but I can tell he's got cognitive dissonnance. Let's make room here for Sparky one day!