DA'd then what to expect.

Crazyguy

So the impending doom of the end is coming and I will not be DF'd so they can tell others I sinned or something else. I will DA, but not sure what to expect next and what they will say to my family and children. I have 5 kids one baptised and ofcourse a wife, so what should i prepare for???

AudeSapere

I have not been following your story, but with family still in, why even *consider* DA'g.

As far as the announcement and the cong treatment after the announcement, it is all the same thing. Although DA may be worse because they consider DA even more willful and apostacy is usually assumed to be the motivation.

Why do you think you should DA?

-Aude.

Black Sheep

You should make it your business to know the answer to these questions before you put your head on the block. They will usually just follow official policy, so there shouldn't be any unexpected and pleasant surprises.

The Searcher

I agree with all of the above; Remember what Jesus said at John 8:7 about "casting the first stone."

Why incriminate yourself in other people's eyes?

Let them do their dirty work, let it be on their consciences, even it's based on the fact that you have declined any/all invitations to discuss your "spiritual" choices with them. They are not masters over anyone's faith - each one will render an account for himself!

If you figuratively commit Hari-Kari, then the elders get off Scot-free and can privately tell anyone/everyone, "He D/Ad", and they'd be telling the truth.

But if you pass the ball to them, they can't go explaining to anyone what they did and why they did it, because that would raise questions and murmurings.

Never D/A!!!!

Daniel1555

Dear crazyguy

I briefly looked at some of your posts. I saw that you had some discussions with your wife about the topics mediator and blood. You wrote you needed to talk to the elders and you did. Then she nearly left because of spiritual endangerment.

My situation is similar to yours. I also told my wife and the elders about my doubts. That affected our relationship quite a lot because she feels that I spiritually cheated on her. I recently told the elders that I would accept and also donate blood. So I don't know yet if they will finally view me as da by action.

My question to you is. How does your wife view you now? Is your relationship better?

If you want to make it clear that you don't want to be a jw then da. Then you can find happiness in another christian church or also just by your personal relationship to Jesus. I can't tell you how this will affect your wife. If you continue to be a loving and respectful father it will maybe be good for your children as you don't have to pretend any longer that you follow jw rules and they see it.

If you da then you show them that you don't agree. Of course you could also try to fade it is not that easy to weigh

Daniel1555

weigh what is better especially if you have kids and wife.

I wish you all the best. I am there for you if you want to talk more.

Daniel

Daniel1555

Maybe this thread will help you too.http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/266224/1/What-is-the-best-for-the-child-if-father-knows-TTATT-and-mother-is-a-devout-JW

ABibleStudent

Hi Crazyguy, It sounds like you should avoid the elders at all cost. How about a family vacation to someplace nice? The tropics are expensive and beautiful this time of year, so you may be able to romance your wife to love you more than the WTBTS.

Have you started a bible study night with your family? You can use the bible study as a way of helping your wife and children to critically think for themselves. If you haven't read Steve Hassan's books yet, I would order "Freedom of Mind: Helping Loved Ones Leave Controlling People, Cults and Beliefs" in an e-book format ASAP. You might also be able to save your marriage by calling Steve Hassan and talking to him or one of his coaches about what you should do ASAP. You can find Steve Hassan's phone number on his website www.freedomofmind.com.

Best of wishes fading from the WTBTS with your family,

Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert

DesirousOfChange

I will not be DF'd so they can tell others I sinned or something else. I will DA,

No one will know the difference because the same announcement is made: "Crazyguy is no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses." That's it. Period. No difference.

If you want to salvage things for a short while to avoid the stress for your wife and in your family, I think you could probably punt by saying that you are confused. I read your DA letter in your other post. You won't make any points or convince any of the elders any differently if you give them that letter. They'll think you're just another crazy person who delusionally thinks they are of the "annointed class". If you have ANY history of any kind of depression or mental illness, they will blame it on that, but they will feel compelled to DA you to protect the Congregation.

If you want out, give 'em the letter.

If you want to lay low and fade slowly at your own pace, then STFU and tell them you just don't understand what John's Gospel is saying and sit back and listen. Then give them a hug and tell them you understand it all now and thank them and show them the door.

It all boils down to whether you want THEM to show YOU the door or vice versa.

Good luck.

Doc

Aroq

They are not masters over anyone's faith - each one will render an account for himself!<------ this!

I just spoke something of this nature to my Mother-in-law. Kinda made her step back and think for a moment.

DA'd then what to expect.

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