I'm married with small children. My wife and I both born-in and baptized JWs. I began my slow drift about a year ago. I've discussed this with my wife. She is ok with it, but has always maintained that she still believes it. This morning when she said she was going to the meeting with the kids I told her I had some plumbing work that needed done so I wouldn't be going. When she came home she was crying and she informed me....."I'm done!" I said, what do you mean? She told me she was getting glares from the old bats at the hall because our son couldn't sit still. And she's tired of it and never wants to go back. Obviously I'm stunned and I expect she'll soften up on her stance. She told me she wants to write a letter saying she's never going back. I told her I'm not sure that's a good idea and we will think this through and discuss it. But this is huge! This afternoon she baked cookies and told me she's sending them to school with my son to give to his classmates for his birthday. And that she thinks we should buy the kids presents for Xmas! i'm absolutely dumbfounded at this.......but so happy!! Just had to share with someone. Thanks.
so happy today!!
by XstuckX 33 Replies latest jw friends
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adamah
XStuckX said-
I told her I'm not sure that's a good idea and we will think this through and discuss it.
Holy Hades, dude!
If you don't have any other legitimate excuses to delay (eg other family members), I say get while the going is good! She wants to celebrate Xmas (which is a week and a half away), so don't pussy-foot around and get cold feet now! The mall crowds are going to be atrocious the weekend before Xmas, and it's Sunday, so there's still shopping hours left today and the Xmas tree lots are thinned out by now! In fact, take her to the mall RIGHT NOW, and just "browse".
Making a clean break from the JWs with your family intact would be the greatest Xmas gift, EVER, and screw the extended family (they're likely not going to change their minds, anyway, and YOUR kids should be the most important ones in your lives, esp if you and her don't want them to waste their lives trapped in the vortex of chasing a pipe-dream).
Adam
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rip van winkle
Yay!
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XstuckX
adamah.....you're right. Unfortunately there are some circumstances that prevent a clean break. Mainly....I work for an elder and it won't be pretty. In a few years I'll be part owner....if I make it that long and he won't be able to screw me over. but now with what happened today it's got me thinking I need to make a move.
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cofty
I am so happy for you. Another family escapes!
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Hortensia
Give your wife a hug from all of us! I'm so glad she's sick of it all. Your children will be so much happier than if they are raised JW.
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LoisLane looking for Superman
I am so happy for you. Sounds like you have a smart and lovely wife.
LoisLane
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adamah
XstuckX said-
adamah.....you're right. Unfortunately there are some circumstances that prevent a clean break. Mainly....I work for an elder and it won't be pretty. In a few years I'll be part owner....if I make it that long and he won't be able to screw me over. but now with what happened today it's got me thinking I need to make a move.
Of course, I don't know the details of your situation, but now that you know TTATT, what price are you willing to pay for your kids freedom?
There's no non-painful way to pull a bandaid off without it hurting, but I'm all for the fast method...
And hopefully you've been planning (and sticking to) an exit strategy all these months since you've committed to TTATT (where step #1 SHOULD be finding another job), because a plan isn't going to fall from the sky into your lap or develop spontaneously on its own....
Granted, it's a GREAT sign, but you really need to develop a plan with her TODAY, and commit it in writing, signed and dated with a definite timeframe. Even if you get her to commit to a plan, that's a GREAT accomplishment since you can plan it together, and then keep it on the down-low from the boss and KH. That's a great step towards getting to where you want to go....
Adam
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smiddy
I hope everything works out for you , but I dont envy your situation working for an elder.
smiddy
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Crazyguy
Awesome strike while the fire is hot and share some TTatt.