Any suggestions to help? (page 2)

Finkelstein

Basically the "truth" must be Jehovah's org because of all of the light they have shed that makes them different from other religions.

The reason you think so is because you have been single handedly indoctrinated to think so from one source that

being the WTS. The term brainwashed gets used in these situations.

The WTS. holds people to its lies by using tactics of fear, guilt and coercion.

Research some the most prominent doctrines from this religious organization and you'll see the lies and corruption

of what is so obvious to many, ex-jws or not.

Test the spirit as the bible suggests.

Don't be fooled by the supposed (new) light this org. produces, some it was presented decades ago as marketing schemes.

This is really all dependent onto your own personal integrity of looking for the "Truth"

Hi casio, If you haven't read Steve Hassan's books (i.e., "Combatting Cult Mind Control", "Releasing the Bonds: Empowering People to Think for Themselves", and (his latest book) "Freedom of Mind: Helping Loved Ones Leave Controlling People, Cults and Beliefs"), visit his website www.freedomofmind.com, and/or watched his videos on his website, do it quickly before you blurt out TTATT to your wife. No matter what you decide continue to post on JWN to vent your emotions so that your wife does not feel that you are an apostate, and to ask for more detailed advice.

If your wife is a "Spiritually Strong" (non-thinking) JW, your best course of action is to:

Learn about how to overcome BITE control techniques that the WTBTS uses by reading Steve Hassan's books and watch his videos like Strategic Interactive Approach explained 2003 (1:23:23),
Do fun activities where your wife will be able to meet non-JWs who she may share common interests,
Ask her simple questions in a form like is described in exJW Psychology 102--How to Ask a Question When Questions Aren't Allowed by Billy the Ex-Bethelite,
Start doing Bible study nights with her to help her understand how the Pharisees and Sadducees used BITE control techniques to victimize Jews without saying anything about the WTBTS,
Start a time consuming hobby with your wife that your wife would like that will take time away from participating in WTBTS activities.

If your wife is a "Spiritually Weak" (still thinking) JW and asks you questions that implies that she has doubts, do the aforementioned activities and help her to do her own research to convince herself that her doubts are valid. Also, make plans to fade from the WTBTS and obtain more education/training to become more financially secure.

Best of wishes helping your wife and JW family to critically think for themselves.

Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert

casio

Thanks for the responses. I'll have a look through the links etc and give it a go.

Or alternatively, grab my woman by the hair, caveman style, and shout at her until she sees sense! Have I got the approach right Narcisisstic?

steve2

There's kind of difficult balance between declaring where you yourself stand and respectfully staying attuned to where your spouse is "at". It speaks well of you that you are taking a more considered course. Anyone can mouth off about what they object to in the organization and then face the fallout.

You clearly love your wife and kids. She's a bit hooked into having a nervous intolerance of ambiguity - which afflicts a large number of religious people. They assume everything should be neatly explained and that black and white should universally stand out. No trinity, no hellfire, no immortal soul, no voting, no birthdays, no Christmas, no backsliding, no military service, no premarital sex, no extramarital sex, no speaking out of line. No, no, no, no, no. Anything or anyone who says :"Yes" is suspect.

It is not only the JWs who evidence this kind of thinking. It is endemic in fundamentalist churches and religions the world over.

To rise up against one's religion of birth takes courage and stamina. Little wonder, most JWs who harbor some misgivings, sleep walk their way through life. Not strongly spiritual enough to investigate their doubts, not secure enough emotionally to drop out. Caught in a never, never world of existential indecisiveness.

RayPublisher

Slow and careful Casio and you will prevail.

Angus Beef

Casio,

I wish you were my son in law. Just within the week I've had my awakening, and I'm only going to stay for my daughter and grandkids. I only wish my sil was in your mind set. My daughter is more head strong and I can't imagine her questioning. It would take her husband to bring her to her senses. Please do what you can. GOod advice here as I've read trying to relate it to my situation. I'm sure there's a way to get her to see , but it will have to be her awakening... give it time. I've overwhelmed my husband and it's put him in a strange position. Just go slow...good luck!!!

Giordano

I agree with Billy........ if I was still in the pedophile issue would have been the big stumble. How can JW's approach householders in Field Service and risk exposing them to unknown pedophiles in the congregation because of the two witness rule. The society has recieved somthing like 23,000 letters about suspected or known pedophiles many who have been welcomed back by Elders who are prevented from informing the congregation. Parents who are not informed can not protect their children or a bible study or another person's JW child.

In all good faith I would never join in the field service on this one issue alone.

JW facts was also a good call by Cantleave http://www.jwfacts.com/watchtower/similar-religions-to-jehovahs-witnesses.php

A Bible Student has provided information on the different ways to approach the subject.

LisaRose

This is the reasoning that kept me tied to the organization for so many years.

Trinity and hell fire are wrong, only JWs do not teach this, therefore they must be the only true religion.

The Watchtower uses this reasoning to keep you mentally enslaved. There are religions that do not teach these things, there are religions that have no set doctrine as well. There are a lot of other things that are more important than a few specific doctrine issues. Things like false predictions, allowing pedophiles to prey on children in the congregation, splitting up families due to harsh disfellowshiping policies, hypocrisy of joining the UN, the unchristian practice of ridiculous expectations, time control, and lies to generate more donations.

If God exists, do you really think he would overlook such horrible conduct because they possibly got a few things right? The Watchtower likes to point the finger at every other religion, but when it comes to their own failures, it's another story. Then they play the "we are just imperfect men" card, when they have set themselves up as God's own organization. They can't have it both ways, either they are just men, in which case why must you follow them? If they represent God, then why do they make so many mistakes and need to change doctrines so much?

Show your wife this website howcultswork.com. It is not an apostate site, it is not specifically about JWs. Have her read it and tell you that it doesn't apply to the JWs. I sent think she will be able to.

Any suggestions to help?