I agree with everyone else here who says to forbid the elders from meeting with your wife without you. And who did the elders think molested your daughter...you, or is there a child molester in the congregation that no one else knows about?
Dumb ass cultish elders
by Crazyguy 20 Replies latest jw experiences
-
-
Finkelstein
Weird behavior in that the child molestation hasn't anything to do with religious matters,
its a social behavior matter outside of religious beliefs.
They must have thought that the perpetrator was you or someone in your family.
But like the folks have already said, elders are like children at times playing power games with little
intelligence or education.
.
By the way when and if ever officially Da, make way for bad things said to you to demean your character,
JWS will do that, even if they have to make things up, its their way of showing their spiritual strength and
loyalty to the organization.
.
If your wife is still attending meetings they will point their finger at you as being
a stumbler to your wife's spirituality, a imposing threat more or less.
This is how this cult operates and its very similar to many others, its a power game for the stupid and corrupt.
-
LostGeneration
Call the cops. Tell them the home numbers and addresses of these elders and let them know that even though all seems to be ok you cannot trust these men because of the religion's child abuse policy.
That should keep them busy for a few days.
Oh, and this isn't revenge, it is making sure that everything is investigated the way it should be by the people who should investigate it, the police.
-
DATA-DOG
Bro, please have the Elders over again. Do not attack them. Just ask them with your wife present, WHY they felt that they should not come to you with that info. Make them give you a SCRIPTURAL reason. Accept no excuses. Demand answers, but don't get angry. If they refuse, kindly tell them that you will be calling the police. LOST GENERATION is right on the money. Look at the reporting laws for your state. Hold them accountable.
DD
-
problemaddict
I hope you let them have it with both barrels. They don't deserve to be let off easy with that kind of behavior.
It sounds so high school!
-
144001
It blows my mind that you would allow your wife to go sit privately with these idiots and have a discussion with them in your absence. I can't even imagine the amount of rage a situation like this would create for me. Fortunately, I married a "worldly" woman whose only exposure to this cult is marrying me, years after I'd stopped attending as a teenager.
Take a step back, pretend you've never been exposed to the JWs, and think about how inappropriate a normal person would view this situation as. Two men come to the door, ask to speak with your wife, ask to have privacy which is accomplished by having her sit in the car with them, etc. Most people would consider this to be incredibly freakish and some men might even go so far as to throw a punch.
The power they have over you comes directly from you; you give them whatever power they have. In the words of Nancy Reagan, "just say no" to cult members who try to exercise control over you.
-
JWdaughter
No man needs privacy with your wife. EVER. If you overhear something said in your own home, oh well, it is your home. There is nothing that they should be saying that can't be said with you in the room-and that does not mean that you need to participate. You can be putzing around on your computer, making a cuppa or whatever. Don't run your wife out of your home and don't encourage her to meet with other men in cars (or anywhere), please.
Ok, you can mark me as a bit old fashioned, but I don't trust the elders motivations in speaking with a woman away from her fading husband.
-
DogGone
CrazyGuy,
Sorry for this situation, how upsetting on every angle. It sounds like it was certainly handled very very poorly.
To those condemning the fact you "would allow" your wife to talk to Elder's in the car, get over yourselves. I know we all got indoctrinated in a sexist, paternalistic, backward religion, but did you not think that she might WANT to talk to her spiritual leaders in private? It's a cult, yes! But no one should be prevented from talking in private to whatever group they would like, however crazy we think it. I understand the desire to use their backward rules against them; but I have to wholeheartedly condemn adopting a heavy handed dictatorial "head of the household" rule.
If I tried that with my Catholic wife she'd understandably look at me like I was an idiot. She is much smarter than I (Catholicism notwithstanding)
-
cofty
I have to wholeheartedly condemn adopting a heavy handed dictatorial "head of the household" rule. - DogGone
this ^^^^^^^^^^^
-
144001
" I have to wholeheartedly condemn adopting a heavy handed dictatorial "head of the household" rule." DogGone
DogGone,
It's not about "head of household" issues, it's about what's proper in a relationship. Would your wife be ok with two women showing up to your house and asking to speak to you in private, in their car, outside of your wife's presence? I doubt it.
Men need to learn to be men again. The "system of things" we live in has blurred the gender distinctions . . .