Well - here goes.
As soon as I left the org in my early 20s, I started up college again. By the time my sophmore year rolled around, I got into this little side job because the university I went to decided to raise tuition. A classmate of mine, Brenda, in an effort to raise money and stay in school came up with a nifty plan where she thought she'd date guys and charge them money. She approached me cause she was going on lots of dates with lots of boys all the time. She said she needed someone to help her out, with all the logistics. I told her I could help with scheduling and providing transportation services, and such. She agreed. She said she also needed my help to make sure the dates went ok and the guys paid her. She said she'd give me a percentage.
So there I was, my sophmore year, doing this little side gig, just trying to help a friend. We started making a lot of money, and wouldn't you know it, some of Brenda's girlfriends decided they wanted to be a part of it. Pretty soon there were about 14 ladies that I was protecting while they gave me money. I decided I shouldn't use my real name, so we came up with the name Gator. One day I wake up and I don't like what I see. I had gotten out of control. I could see a real darkness in me since I left the org. I had gotten so out of control that I didn't even realize it.
One night two of my favorite girls, Candy and Joline, said 'we gotta take you in'. They dropped me off at the emergency room. I realized then and there, without the org, the darkness takes over me. No matter how much I try to hold it in, it's there, wanting to come out, to walk around. It wants some walking around money. It wants to buy some shoes and it wants to walk up to the people and say 'Hey. Gator don't play no s#%t. He ain't never been about that. you hear me?!' But I finally left that part of my life behind. However, it really is who I am - despite my day job. So be forwarned everyone, The watchtower is right. If you leave the org, you could end up like me:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JMUsStYvTaI&feature=related