Don't Masturbate

by mynameislame 45 Replies latest social humour

  • RottenRiley
    RottenRiley

    cantleave, we should attribute that quote to the Dukes of Hazzardous Religion. Why are those old men so concerned about sexuality? According to Ezk Chapter 16, Sodom's sin was not sexual as the Organization would love to say. Ezk 16 is speaking here, telling us as it describes the gross lack of compassion and love for the lowly ones. JWs dont care about the and emotionally sick members unless they are rich and spend their time in Field Circus. I ran in to a young brother, this experience is very common among our afectless religion. Conversation went, Hey James how you doing? "Life is treating me like shit", I bought him lunch and we sat down and spoke about his experience in the Organization. James was a big boy, he grew like weed and refused to keep his masturbtion a secret like I had consouled him to do. I did my very best to explain all sane psychologist say it's natural and it's not a sin. He was dumb enough to tell the elders he was "beating his meat", this turned the elders against James because the advice the elders gave him "Take cold showers", "Put ice in your pants", "pray, pray, pray" did not work.

    James stopped attending Meetings and his local BOE was so happy not to have to ask him questions so they never checked on him once he left the Organization. James had not been to Meetings for seven years and only did the elders check on him when they heard he might be studying with the Mormons and threatened him with his status of "a publisher of the good news", the elders told him the "the Mormons are good with families and social things but they don't have the truth! Are you going to exchange the Truth for a group of people who are more worried about families and get-togethers, instead of focusing on our true calling of preaching the GoodNews? Twisted BOE

    Jehovah's Witnesses as a whole, are good at practing. Their Spiritual Paradise is as Bobwen call's it "Pedophile Paradise", if a sister tells other members in her Kingdum Hall she was molested, she is taken before the Elders and told "Stop Gossiping or we will Disfellowship you.", that happened to my wife!

    “Behold, everyone who quotes proverbs will quote this proverb concerning you, saying, ‘[v]Like mother, [w]like daughter.’ 45 You are the daughter of your mother, who loathed her husband and children. You are also the sister of your sisters, who loathed their husbands and children. Your mother was a Hittite and your father an Amorite. 46 Now your older sister is Samaria, who lives [x]north of you with her [y]daughters; and your younger sister, who lives [z]south of you, is Sodom with her[aa]daughters. 47 Yet you have not merely walked in their ways or done according to their abominations; but, as if that were too little, you acted more corruptly in all your conduct than they.48 As I live,” declares the Lord God, “Sodom, your sister and her daughters have not done as you and your daughters have done. 49 Behold, this was the guilt of your sister Sodom: she and her daughters had arrogance, abundant food and careless ease, but she did not [ab]help the poor and needy. 50 Thus they were haughty and committed abominations before Me. Therefore I removed them [ac]when I sawit. 51 Furthermore, Samaria did not commit half of your sins, for you have multiplied your abominations more than they. Thus you have made your sisters appear righteous by all your abominations which you have committed. 52 Also bear your disgrace in that you have [ad]made judgment favorable for your sisters. Because of your sins in which you acted more abominably than they, they are more in the right than you. Yes, be also ashamed and bear your disgrace, in that you made your sisters appear righteous.

    53 “Nevertheless, I will restore their captivity, the captivity of Sodom and her daughters, the captivity of Samaria and her daughters, and [ae]along with them [af]your own captivity, 54 in order that you may bear your humiliation and feel ashamed for all that you have done when you become a consolation to them. 55 Your sisters, Sodom with her daughters and Samaria with her daughters, [ag]will return to their former state, and you with your daughters will also return to your former state. 56 As the name of your sister Sodom was not heard from your lips in your day of pride, 57 before your wickedness was uncovered, [ah]so now you have become the reproach of the daughters of [ai]Edom and of all who are around her, of the daughters of the Philistines—those surrounding you who despise you. 58 You haveborne the penalty of your lewdness and abominations,” the Lord declares. 59 For thus says the LordGod, “I will also do with you as you have done, you who have despised the oath by breaking the covenant.

    "Everytime you masturbate an angel loses his wings." cantleave's quote.

  • NewYork44M
    NewYork44M

    bigmac, That is absolutely terrible, shame on you. How can I get rid of that image?

  • Crazyguy
    Crazyguy

    I think the only men that never masturbated were scared screwed up men and the others were those that had multiple wives or girls friends.

  • frankiespeakin
    frankiespeakin

    I'm thinkin of the kingdom melody right now "If You keep your hands/eyes off/on the prize"

  • fulltimestudent
    fulltimestudent

    and then there's this aspect:

    EJACULATING 4-6 TIMES A WEEK REDUCES THE RISK OF PROSTATE CANCER

    As part of a massive study, led by epidemiologist Michael Leitzmann at Harvard, they recently studied nearly 30,000 men participating in the Health Professionals Follow-up Study. Most of these men were white and middle-aged, and very few had ever had a sexually transmitted disease. �In 1992, we asked the men who did not have prostate cancer to report their typical number of ejaculations per month in their twenties, forties, and during the past year,� says Platz.

    The scientists found that men who reported more ejaculations�more than 21 a month, on average across their adult life�had twothirds the lifetime risk of prostate cancer of men who reported fewer (4 to 7) ejaculations a month. Notes Platz: �Compared with men reporting fewer ejaculations per month at all ages, men who reported 21 or ejaculations per month had one-fourth the risk of prostate cancer.�Over the next eight years, nearly 1,500 of these men went on to develop prostate cancer.

    Certain important features of this study make these observations more credible, she adds. One is the sheer number of men involved; another is �the fact that the men reported their ejaculation frequency well before they were diagnosed with prostate cancer.� Also, the scientists were able to rule out such factors as a man�s history of sexually transmitted diseases, which could have clouded the results.

    Another recent study of many men, with and without prostate cancer, has produced similar findings, says Platz. �Based on these two large, well-conducted studies, men should not be worried that frequent ejaculation will cause prostate cancer.� The next step, she adds, is to figure out why frequent ejaculation seems to have this protective effect, and the role inflammation plays here.

    Reference: http://urology.jhu.edu/newsletter/prostate_cancer712.php

    It may be difficult for many men to maintain that rate of sexual activity with a marriage partner, so an alternative must be found. The problem for a faithful, obedient male who is a JW, is that all the alternatives can get him chucked out of the witness organisation.

    So, imagine this scenario - if I followed the GB's advice (remembering that its difficult to argue that the Bible (or, Jesus) forbids masturbation) and developed prostate cancer, CAN I SUE?

  • OUTLAW
    OUTLAW

    .............Don't Masturbate

    ..................... UUHHhhhh......OK..

    ......

    ....................................................................... photo mutley-ani1.gif ...OUTLAW

  • heathen
    heathen

    LMAO@bigmac ... that's a cure for masturbation alright , just get used to the image of one of the GB members showing up in fantasy mode should end all pleasure seeking . I think that today there are so many chemicals were are exposed to that probably make it not natural to masturbate but a reaction to it . It would be nice to find a partner but that doesn't happen for everyone certianly not the 12 year old that was beating off next to me at the KH , absolutely pathetic to have to be exposed to that . Then I believe he lied to other members in the KH and accused me of wrong doing since people became very insulting toward me , to this day I can't seem to get them to admit it . It happened a very long time ago .

  • DATA-DOG
    DATA-DOG

    Can angels masturbate???

  • trujw
    trujw

    i guess in light of the Turds talk it needs to say don't wear tight pants.

  • frankiespeakin

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