I want to send a nice note to my sister

by Faithful Witness 18 Replies latest jw friends

Faithful Witness

It's been about 5 weeks, since my sister sent me the email telling me she no longer wants to communicate with me (at this time).

I was never a JW, so I am not going to agree to those crazy terms. I explained to her that she can do what she wants, but I will continue to be kind, and that I forgive her cruel treatment toward me.

I have given her some space, and I feel like I am ready to send her another note. Instead of bringing up any hard feelings of today, I was going to share some memories that I have of our early, Pre-JW days. I am the oldest, and she is the youngest in our family, 12 years younger than me.

Before I send it, I wanted to run it by you all and see if anything is going to pop out as controversial. These are all inside jokes, and probably won't be funny at all... but tell me if this is too much, or if something I am saying is going to sound an alarm and make her raise her cult spikes.

I don't expect a reply from her, nor do I think anything I say to her right now has a snowball's chance in Africa to reach her... but I still want her to know that my feelings for her have not changed. What do you think?

Hi R,

I just wanted you to know that I've been thinking about you.

It's been about a month since you sent your last email, so I thought I'd just check in and say hello to you and the family.

Lately, I've been remembering some old times, and have some really cute memories of hanging out with you. A few of them are from when you were just in preschool. You have always been such a sweet-hearted person.

I remember when you used to come up to me, turn around, and in your cute little voice would say, "Will you cratch my back?"

You have always been so cute, Rl!! I could never help but adore you. "One time, I said..."

Remember when you gave me that French manicure when I had a broken arm? I remember sitting around at Mom's house, waiting for you to get home from school. Haha. Those were the days!

$*o|\~ sing$ "Loving you is easier than falling off a log... A cat is still a cat, and a dog is still a dog... dog..." $*o|\~ sing$

Anyway, I just want you to know I will never stop loving you, and I will never stop being your big sister. Maybe some day you will be able to see things from my perspective. I love you forever, my little applesauce spiller!
jgnat

Perfect, just perfect.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6z-oBkgJ4Ow
truthseekeriam

I think it's wonderful!
Xanthippe
jgnat

Xanthippe, I regularly encourage non-believing family to recall warm shared memories of their past with JW family, as it is a way to awaken the natural/authentic persona.
Xanthippe
RottenRiley

You are a class act, I hope your sister responds in a kind fashion. Please gear yourself to accept they enjoy having a strange power over you, it's because you have a heart and they don't. You will be surprised as you began to live your life how little empathy she has and maybe you will realize there were rules in your previous relationship you had to follow to keep her by your side. I know many JWs who find out the only way they could keep their friends or family was by losing their own personal idenity to become what the other JW wanted you to be. Please read this quote from Wiki, it might help you understand the battle that lay's ahead of you. I watched my JW Aunts and Uncles behave like Gladiators in the Roman Arena, not as a group helping each other but as each member trying to destroy themselves. The hatred JWs display towards their own members falls under the catagory of Murder and their affectless grows fast.

http://www.cultwatch.com/howcultswork.html

Why does the religion create a black-hole, people who join the religion want others to join with them, once they join they than knit-pick each other trying to see who is the most righteous and when they push their family or stumble them, the good Witness feels validated they can now treat you worse than ever, it's not you fault she is the way she is. You can't live your life begging people to be your friend, it's only going to disappoint you, maybe I am wrong and all the familes I saw destroyed by the religion are limited. I pray she treats you kindly, peace to you!

Parallel Verses New International Version
Anyone who claims to be in the light but hates a brother or sister is still in the darkness.

New Living Translation
If anyone claims, "I am living in the light," but hates a Christian brother or sister, that person is still living in darkness.

English Standard Version
Whoever says he is in the light and hates his brother is still in darkness.

New American Standard Bible
The one who says he is in the Light and yet hates his brother is in the darkness until now.

King James Bible
He that saith he is in the light, and hateth his brother, is in darkness even until now.

Holman Christian Standard Bible
The one who says he is in the light but hates his brother is in the darkness until now.

International Standard Version
The person who says that he is in the light but hates his brother is still in the darkness.

NET Bible
The one who says he is in the light but still hates his fellow Christian is still in the darkness.

Aramaic Bible in Plain English
Whoever says, therefore, that he is in the light and hates his brother, is in darkness still.

GOD'S WORD® Translation
Those who say that they are in the light but hate other believers are still in the dark.

Jubilee Bible 2000
He that says he is in the light and hates his brother is still in darkness.

King James 2000 Bible
He that says he is in the light, and hates his brother, is in darkness even until now.

American King James Version
He that said he is in the light, and hates his brother, is in darkness even until now.

American Standard Version
He that saith he is in the light and hateth his brother, is in the darkness even until now.

Douay-Rheims Bible

A New Command
…8On the other hand, I am writing a new commandment to you, which is true in Him and in you, because the darkness is passing away and the true Light is already shining. 9The one who says he is in the Light and yet hates his brother is in the darkness until now. 10The one who loves his brother abides in the Light and there is no cause for stumbling in him.… Cross References Leviticus 19:17
"'Do not hate a fellow Israelite in your heart. Rebuke your neighbor frankly so you will not share in their guilt.

2 Samuel 13:22
And Absalom never said a word to Amnon, either good or bad; he hated Amnon because he had disgraced his sister Tamar.

Acts 1:15
In those days Peter stood up among the believers (a group numbering about a hundred and twenty)

1 John 2:11
But anyone who hates a brother or sister is in the darkness and walks around in the darkness. They do not know where they are going, because the darkness has blinded them.

1 John 3:10
This is how we know who the children of God are and who the children of the devil are: Anyone who does not do what is right is not God's child, nor is anyone who does not love their brother and sister.

1 John 3:15
Anyone who hates a brother or sister is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life residing in him.

1 John 3:16
This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters.

1 John 4:20
Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. Treasury of Scripture

He that said he is in the light, and hates his brother, is in darkness even until now.

that saith. See on ver.

1 John 2:4 He that said, I know him, and keeps not his commandments, is a liar, …

he is.

1 John 1:6 If we say that we have fellowship with him, and walk in darkness, …

John 9:41 Jesus said to them, If you were blind, you should have no sin: but …

Romans 2:18-21 And know his will, and approve the things that are more excellent, …

and hateth.

1 John 3:13-17 Marvel not, my brothers, if the world hate you…

is in.

1 John 2:11 But he that hates his brother is in darkness, and walks in darkness, …

Psalm 82:5 They know not, neither will they understand; they walk on in darkness: …

1 Corinthians 13:1-3 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not …

2 Peter 1:9 But he that lacks these things is blind, and cannot see afar off, …

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jgnat

Xanthippe, I am convinced it is in there, if you look hard enough. I helped a young man see past his mother's zeal, and he subsequently asked her questions about her childhood. He discovered elements of his mother's character that he hadn't noted before. Just recently he noted where his mother diverts from WTS teachings, in her fierce desire to see her son be well-off and comfortable in this life.

Knowing these things helps us address our loved-one's natural personality, reinforcing it so that perhaps one day they will break free from the programming.
ABibleStudent

Hi Faithful Witness, It is an awesome letter.

I would remove the sentence " Maybe some day you will be able to see things from my perspective." until after your relationship improves with her and you say it to her instead of writing it to her. JWs' cult personas are narsistic so your perspective is not important to it. Also, you do not know if your sister's authentic or cult persona will be reading the note.

Keep your note simple, send lots of pictures of you and your family having lots of fun, invite her to future outings, and tell her how much you love her unconditionally.

Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert
adamah

Hi FW,

Looks good, but I'd consider what Robert says and editing it down to something 'shorter and sweet', maybe going with only ONE or TWO shared memories, at this point (vs four). It strikes me as a tad excessive, and as someone who doesn't know the full back-story, I get a whiff of desperation (as if trying to 'love bomb' with emotive memories). Other benefit of cutting back is you'll have some 'shared memory ammunition' in reserve for later, if needed.

I want to send a nice note to my sister

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