Is it just me?

by mommy 14 Replies latest social physical

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  mommy

  I have noticed we have several "active" jws on this board, and some of their comments really bother me.
  When I was active, when the wtbts said "Don't associate with apostates or worldly people" I didn't. When they said "Spend more time in the ministry" I went to school, held down a job. and aux. pioneered. When they said,"Make the truth your own" I did that too and was baptized. I have always had a personal relationship with Jehovah and this has helped me tremendously to make it through the good, bad, and ugly!
  My point is, there are active Jws here and on other boards who are very flippant about their committment to org. I am afraid maybe I took them too seriously. Was I duped into believing you are supposed to give 110% of yourself to org? Was I the only one who thought this?
  Brother Xandit made a comment on another thread, "I have been fairly successful in the Org with defining myself on my own terms" Is that so? Really? Hhmm.
  So here I am thinking maybe I will join Xandit's congregation, and start defining things in my terms. How long do you think that will last?
  wendy
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  Sassenach

  Wendy,

  I said prior that the witnesses that I am acquainted with take their religion very seriously. Very few have gone to school past highschool, several of them work odd hours so they can pioneer full time, they sing kingdom songs at their get togethers, and the children do not join in extracurricular activities. It always struck me that their lives were organized to accomodate their religion's expectations.

  I don't think you are the only one, but I do think Xandit is the only one of his kind. That's good for him, but I wish he wouldn't minimize the experiences of other people here.

  How can a witness define things in his own terms? What happeend to the united in worship concept and being of one mind? If you are a witness don't you believe that jehovah is running the religion? How can a witness criticize their religion without criticizing jehovah?

  I really don't think you are alone Wendy. Your life as witness sounds consistent with the others I have known--I am limited to a few congregations here and the magazines to go by. I have met a lot like you and never one like xandit, and if his type existed (and the majority as he says), I would have at least met one!
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  RedhorseWoman

  I think that the problem here is that JWs who are active on the internet tend to be anachronistic to begin with. The WTBTS has never encouraged any sort of leisure activity that didn't involve studying or preaching.

  Those who are willing to flaunt THAT little rule are the ones who show up on "apostate" boards. I know that I would NEVER have looked at a board such as this when I was active....for god's sake, I was terrified to read a work of fiction for fear that I would be "joining my mind" with an author who was a bad influence and who would cause me to stumble in my desire to serve Jehovah wholeheartedly.

  This is just my opinion, but I think that those such as Xandit and DrivesLikeJehu are in for a rather rude awakening at some point in time. Either the WTBTS is changing and becoming more mainstream, or there will shortly be a crackdown on those who flaunt the rules.

  There have always been those who hang on the "fringe" with their pseudo-JW outlook. There were some in our congregation like that. They did what they wanted with seemingly no repercussions. They weren't following the rules, however, no matter how much they tried to make others believe that the Society was really pretty reasonable about things. The WTBTS is NOT reasonable and any "mature Christian" needs to follow the rules.

  JWs such as Xandit and Drives are "sowing their wild oats" so to speak. In addition, they (especially DLJ) are also most likely part of the "royal family" in their respective congregations. People in the upper level of the cliques tend to get more privileges and are allowed to bend the rules to suit their purposes. Unlike the rank and file, they will be allowed to indulge their little idiosyncrasies.
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  SixofNine

  No Wendy, it is not just you.

  Xandits attitudes are freakish. For him to say that his viewpoints are more the norm in the org is either purposely false, or delusional. I will believe the latter, for now.

  I have been surprised at many of the friends in the org I have talked to over the past couple of years. The places they have drawn the lines, so to speak, in regards to what the will or will not try to "get away with", betrays a people who just do not think deeply or believe passionately. Except to the extent that thier beliefs are primarily based on what they want to believe, what they "feel" about matters.

  I think some of us did take it all more seriously, did believe it more passionately. I suppose, since it is ostensibly life and death matters, that was appropriate.

  Maybe that is why we are here, and they, for the most part, are there.

  Edited by - SixofNine on 16 February 2001 13:22:52
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  happytobefree

  I believe there are Witnesses like Xandit, DLJ, and others. My sister who is a JW, she practices the religion the way she see fit. But she is not ask to do parts on the TMS or at the assemblies. She is a great entertainer and very likeable, so she is not excluded from gatherings and she is the daughter of an elder with influence.

  As far as Xandit view on 1976, my father shares his view and lived it also, he told a couple of brothers they were stupid to not keep their life insurance (this was in 1975 when he did so) and he has always spoken about and taught the benefits of 401K, investments, stock market, buying real estate, etc. He is now sending my brother to college, and he helped me with my college education. Even though he would use bribery, if you go to the meeting (he sincerely believe meeting attendance and Field Service will win us over), I will buy you a car so you can get to school. He has taken some grief for his beliefs at times, but they continue to use him for parts and has an upcoming part on the assembly. My belief is because he is very generous with his money and they can relax around him, somewhat. But don't get me wrong, he is not liberal when it come to what the WTBS teach, he stands by them on the big issues (1914, FDS, God's chosen Organ, the only way to be truly happy you must be a JW). But he just draws the line on issues he don't want to believe or the issues he say are just suggestions. And as Xandit said, if it's not a disfellowshipping offense they should leave you alone. I have learn this term from my Father, "Can you show me from the Bible? Another one I've hear him use, So is that from Bro. Johnson 3:16? They leave him alone at the time, but believe me the JW in his congregation (at least the true blue boys) are looking for the day when they can catch him on a disfellowshipping offense.

  And another thing, my father and sisters (the reform one and the disfellowshipped) they would never even think about visiting a site as this. So no I don't understand active JW's visiting this DB. Because even in my reforming the JW days, I would have view this site to be of the Devil. So no, I don't understand visiting this DB if you are PRO-JW.

  Happy to be Free (Me)

  P.S. One more thing about my father, he was raised a Baptist and he lived his life. Drugs and all, there is a experience about his life in the 74' Awake. So I sometime wonder, if this has changed his view of the WTBS.
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  Prisca

  No, it's not just you

  I was raised as an elder's daughter, and although he stepped down when I was young, I was raised to very strict standards. I firmly believed Armageddon was just a few months, if not years away. I believed there was no point in college education, since this system wasn't going to last very long. I didn't take drugs, didn't get drunk, never had sex. I didn't listen to hard rock. I believed all other religions other than JWs were wrong and destined for destruction. I didn't date guys that were not JWs. I looked forward to Bethel service as a possible goal to work towards. I NEVER would look at apostate literature. Internet sites? Never.

  I sometimes wonder which planet Xandit is on, and as for DLJ, I like him but I believe he is on thin ice, particularly since he participates on pro-JW DBs too. It will be a matter of time before he is found out.
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  larc

  Xandit stated recently that 25% of the young JWs in his area were getting college degrees. I wonder if those who have been out less than two years could give an estimate of the percent in their area that are doing this? I would bet that the numbers are very low. I asked Xandit where he lived, but he didn't answer. The only possibility that I can think of is that he lives in a very rich congregation, which, I think, would be a rare one and certainly not representative.

  Perhaps Xandit ability to be different is because he makes major financial contributions. They do tend to go easier on such people. They put up with Michael Jackson for a long time for this reason.

  I certainly can't see that his situation is the norm as he asserts, but, rather, a major exception.
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  thinkers wife

  Wendy and Everyone,
  I too followed the org. to a tee. I was in a congregation for almost seventeen years which was in a very little WV town. I used to get very upset that more effort wasn't made to give better talks and to become more effective in f.s. I tend to put my heart into whatever I am doing. And my heart was in the Org. for a very long time. I made strong efforts to do well in all the required areas. But my main thrust was always love for people. I thought f.s. and giving talks was a way to help people so I was the best I could be at it. I guess that is why I have a long list of names of people who became witnesses at my direction. Sometimes that bothers me now. But I know my heart was in the right place.
  My parents are still very strong witnesses. Both pioneering. Dad for over forty years. They won't even have the internet at the orgs. direction. I would have never even dreamed of reading "apostate" literature. I was like RHW, I even worried about reading the wrong kind of novels. (always loved romance novels, the one's of the innocent variety, and always felt terribly guilty about reading them)
  I don't understand some of the flip attitudes either. But I can tell you this, I don't think it is the norm. Regardless of what these one's claim. And I would never have even come to a board like this, let alone comment. To be honest, I was a little bit paranoid when I first started here.
  Now to be honest, I always did have my own thought process. I.E. I didn't buy into the "your not married if you die and are resurrected" theory, and "all the children of wicked parents are going to be destroyed" theory. I had my own thoughts, just so I could hang in there and keep believing. But I kept it to myself.
  TW
  Gosh, no more edits, think I finally got it right

  Edited by - thinkers wife on 17 February 2001 5:42:55

  Edited by - Thinkers Wife on 17 February 2001 5:45:10

  Edited by - thinkers wife on 17 February 2001 5:47:27
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  trevor

  Hi mommy/Wendy,

  No I don' think its just you. The whole WT outfit has been watered down. Whatever happened to three scripture sermons followed by the three-book offer, which I was proficient at when I was nine! Pre-group ministry. Longer meetings. Three-day Circuit assemblies down to one day. My brothers and me were dragged round the doors for ten hours a week, because the end was so close of course. The Bethel Boppers are now producing books, which look like children picture books; they are easier to sell to the developing countries that are supplementing the Jehovah's Witness numbers

  Even the dress code has gone down the toilet. I remember a neighbouring congregation visiting us to play football and have a picnic. The elders all wore suits and ties to show the worldlings who wandered by that God's people were special. Certainly different! This was the UK mind you - the empire mentality.

  Oh the Glory days!

  Trevor
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  mommy

  Thanks everyone,
  I do feel alot better now I was starting to think I was the only holy rolling witness! One of the things the org taught me was to judge people. I don't want to do this anymore! If the active jws want to talk about what they "can" do that is fine with me. At least I don't feel like I was alone!
  THANKS
  Love wendy