Family Lost- Dealing with the "Inevitable"

by BLWashington 17 Replies latest jw experiences

  • BLWashington
    BLWashington

    So... recently lost my favorite aunt, mother of my favorite cousin- she was a "Witness" when she died. Inactive, but still a Witness. Who lived with my Witness mother and stepdad. It hurt my heart not to be there for my cousin (not a witness)- but Trying to justify being in that situation was too difficult for me truthfully do and respect her memory. See, I'm not one of those awkward feeling, shy to be around JWs, hope they don't see me types... I'm the I've been away from this mess for almost 20 years, and I'm still ready to verbally destroy (and physically if it comes to it) if you try to challenge me about anything that you think you remotely think you know something about- but don't. So don't go there- types.

    But recently, I had to come to a realization. That if I was to get the phone call or text that my mother or stepfather had passed away- I wouldn't fell ANYTHING! Like it's SAD! I picture myself getting the call, saying, wow- turning to my wife- and saying- Damn, my mother (or stepdad) is dead. And turning the channel back to the basketball game. I'm curious, has anyone else felt this way? Like this whole shunning has totally retro-graded my natural "human" emotion toward my own mother? wow...

  • cofty
    cofty

    I hear you.

  • citymouse
    citymouse

    I spent many years mourning the loss of my family. I don't need to do it again when their body dies.

  • ballistic
    ballistic

    My father, I don't think I have spoke of him in 10,000 posts. He became a witness just before he died. It was a road accident.

  • ballistic
    ballistic

    not sure why my number of posts has dropped.

  • Hortensia
    Hortensia

    I felt sorry for my mother when she died, but not especially sad. Because of our upbringing I felt detached from my family. I have stronger bonds with my sisters than I had with my mother -- the fault of the wtbts among other things.

  • Still Totally ADD
    Still Totally ADD

    Sadly I know how you feel and I feel the same way. Cults destroy everything that is human. Sad very Sad. Still Totally ADD

  • clarity
    clarity

    Well ...I thought I wouldn't miss my brothers at all.

    20 yrs later ........different story now.... would love to

    sit down with them & ask all those questions we never

    thought to ask.

    Just to have a brother even sort of in my life .....

    would be comforting now. Think twice.

    clarity

  • Zoos
    Zoos

    BLW, that's exactly how I feel.

    I would be more upset by the realization that I wasn't upset. The death of a family member is supposed to make you cry, mourn. But that won't be the case for me IF someone even bothers to contact me - which I doubt.

    Family bonds can be broken beyond repair. Natural affection can can be destroyed. The Watchtower cult has not only perfected the process but they seem to be honing their skills on it every chance they get.

  • KateWild
    KateWild

    It's a shame that family bonds can be so easily severed. A bruital reality indeed, and so very sad. Kate xx

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