PANDELO's ARE INTERNATIONAL NEWS!!!!!!!!

by deddaisy 11 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  deddaisy

  THIS IS A NEWS WIRE FROM TODAY, CHECK OUT THE DISTRIBUTION..........
  ____________________________________________________________________
  Copyright 2002 Associated Press
  AP Worldstream

  May 11, 2002 Saturday 12:30 AM Eastern Time

  SECTION: INTERNATIONAL NEWS

  DISTRIBUTION: Europe; Britian; Scandinavia; Middle East; Africa; India; Asia; England

  LENGTH: 345 words

  HEADLINE: New Jersey couple excommunicated from Jehovah's Witnesses for speaking out
  against abuse

  BYLINE: BETH CAMPBELL; Associated Press Writer

  DATELINE: LOUISVILLE, Kentucky

  BODY:
  A woman said she and her husband have been excommunicated from the Jehovah's Witnesses
  after speaking out against the church's handling of their daughter's allegations of sex abuse by another
  member.

  Barbara and Carl Pandelo of Belmar, New Jersey, had been awaiting a decision since Monday,
  when a judicial committee of the church met in New Jersey to consider ousting them, a practice
  which the denomination terms disfellowshipping.

  "They've just made it official now," she said Friday night in a telephone interview. They are among
  four Jehovah's Witnesses who were threatened with disfellowship for sowing discord in the faith by
  speaking out against the church.

  One of them, William Bowen, a 44-year-old former church elder from Draffenville, Kentucky, has
  complained that child-sex allegations are generally not reported to secular authorities by the
  Jehovah's Witnesses because of the church's closed nature and insistence on handling problems
  internally.

  Anthony Valenti, an elder in the Pandelos' church, did not immediately return phone calls Friday
  night.

  But J.R. Brown, a spokesman for the denomination, said earlier this week that parents are not
  punished by the church for going to the police first in cases of child molestation. He said anyone
  found guilty of molestation by a church judicial committee is removed from all positions of
  responsibility.

  The Pandelos' dispute with the denomination dates to 1988, when their 12-year-old daughter said
  she was molested by her paternal grandfather, also a member of the faith. The grandfather has
  returned to the denomination.

  Carl and Barbara Pandelo have not been active in the church for some time, she said, but she regrets
  losing the friends they made.

  "To take someone and shun and abandon them is the most psychologically damaging thing you can
  do," Pandelo said.

  Barbara Anderson of Normandy, Tennessee, has also been summoned to appear before a
  committee. Anderson has said she learned about the church's handling of abuse cases while working
  at its headquarters in New York City.
• 

  lastcall

  This story and that of Bill Bowen and others was on the front page of the religion section in northern Indiana papers. There was a pic of Bowen standing in front of a KH. Very revealing article . I would have hated to be out in service today.
• 

  deddaisy

  I wonder if alot of the ones out in service are even aware?
  I've been emailing alot to the newspapers in Ohio and W. Virginia, trying to hit a newspaper that services Stratton.....I address the silentlambs articles to "The residents of Stratton, Ohio" or "To Anyone That Has A Door That Jehovah's Witnesses Have Access To." If I were a Witness, I'd have the flu today.....
• 

  ARoarer

  It amazes me that this whole story has now made National News in Europe, Asia, Middle East and all. I remember when the elders told my daughter she must not tell anyone. She was only 12 at the time and wanted to talk about it with another girl she was friends with in the congregation. Her mother, a very dear friend of mine at the time called me and told me her daughter had mentioned the abuse and that my daughter must not talk about it. She was an elderette. Her husband and other elders later warned us that we must tell our daughter not to mention it to anyone in the congregation or we could be disciplined for slandering the pedophile's name and disturbing the peace of the congregation. I look back on this now and that warning was equal to what a pedophile tells a child. DO NOT TELL OR ELSE....
  Well, now look. The whole world has heard her story. I am still amazed at this.
  Barbara Pandelo
• 

  ARoarer

  PS. The elder mentioned in the beginning of deddaisy's post, Anthony Valenti, is the elder that told us not to tell.
• 

  safe4kids

  Hi Deddaisy,

  Thanks for posting this; is there a link that you could also post? If so, I'd like to have it, if you don't mind.

  Aroarer, thanks for going public with what happened to you and your family. I was also told to keep quiet "in the interests of the congregation", not only about my abuser but also about my child's abuser. When the authorities got involved, one elder accused me of going against biblical instruction "not to take your brother to court". There was NEVER any help or concern offered to my family. The whole focus was on keeping it hushed up. As you say, EXACTLY what the pedophile tells his/her victims.

  Let's see the WTS squirm their way out of this one!

  Dana
• 

  hawkaw

  Good morning ARoarer,

  Your family's courage speaks for itself. Unbelievable how you, Bill and Barb as well as the many others like Erica have handled this. Keep going and don't stop - its a very imporant message. I have yapped a lot with Bill and of course Barb but I can't recall talking to you over this issue.

  I still wish this never had to happen to your family but at least you now have your freedom and you have learned what freedom is and how to use it.

  And as a bonus prize you get you get to watch a large corporation pull some of the most stupidest "optics" I have seen in years. The news cycle on this just keeps going. And the more it goes the more you will be on the news with Mr. "Brokejaw", "Marvelous" Mat and "Perky" Katie and "Captain Dan the News Man".

  Take it too them my friend and get the message out to protect all the innocent little children and ensure those harmed get a financial settlement to atleast help with some of the pain.

  hawk

  p.s. - Valenti must be "thrilled" to have his name in lights
• 

  sadiejive

  Do you by any chance have a link to this article?

  Thanks
• 

  Seeker4

  Aroarer,

  What you said in your post: "Her husband and other elders later warned us that we must tell our daughter not to mention it to anyone in the congregation or we could be disciplined for slandering the pedophile's name..." is exactly the point I made in a discussion on this board a few days ago, on the topic of slander and the WTS's definition of slander.

  One poster said slander is, by definition, a lie about someone. But not so according to the WTS. As in your case, your daughter was abused, and if you or your daughter mentioned the abuser's name in your conversations, you are in the JWs' eyes guilty of slander, and if you persist in mentioning it, you will be disfellowshipped.

  This is one of the key points in the WTS's mishandling of sexual abuse issues, and I'm glad you have made the point so well. As a former elder of many years experience, I've seen this happen over and over in the congregations. The VICTIM is the one who has been consistently threatened by local elders with being disfellowshipped IF they go public about the abuse, because it is slander of the perpetrator. THAT is the reason in a nutshell why sexual abusers have found a haven in the congregations of JWs.

  It is a point that needs to be stressed over and over. The elders and the organization have used their power over members to KEEP THINGS QUIET, warning friends against going to authorities or speaking about the abuse in the congregation, and that is consistently what has allowed abusers to move around and victimize more children.

  The organization may say it no longer interferes with a victim's decision to take the abuse to the proper authorities, but the real point in this is that the WTS DID interfere and counsel against doing this for decades, through the local congregation elders. Your case is a perfect example of that.

  I know this must be a traumtic time in your family's life, but I salute your courage. Your local elders look worse than silly, they look evil in all of this. And now the whole world knows that.

  S4
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  ARoarer

  S4,I always used this argument with anyone telling us to not slander. My husband would tell them slander is telling untruths about someone. That is what JR and the elders are doing to victims and thier advocates. They are implying that we are "defiled, and unclean" when the public statement is made that disfellowshipping is done to keep the congregation clean and undefiled.

  BP