One of the big reasons I left the JW Cult

by Still Totally ADD 55 Replies latest jw friends

  • Still Totally ADD
    Still Totally ADD

    In 1995 we took in a Brother into our home who had MS. He lived with us for almost 15 years. For many of those years with our help he was able to go to all the meetings and assemblies and field service. He was wheel chair bound. As the years went by because of his MS he got weaker and weaker. So his care became even more harder. He was 5 years older than us but our relationship with him became very close where he called us Mom and Dad. His life was in our hands the last two years of his life. He had become bed ridden and on a venterlaor. My wife the primary care giver learned how to do the things it took to keep him alive. As his doctor told us many times we was running a intensive care unit in our house for his well being. He became to us as a child we dearly loved. The two years before he died it was my wife who would stay home to take care of him while I would go to the meetings. At this point it was 24/7 in his care. If see was not home I was. If I was outside she was inside. He could not be left alone. But when it came to meetings or service my wife was the principle care giver. At the meetings some would ask me how she was doing or out was the brother we was taking care of doing. I would always tell them find but why don't you come out and visit for awhile. He would love to see you. He was a people person. He loved being around people. But no one would come out. At elder meetings I would beg for my fellow elders to come out for a visit but none would come. When I asked them why the excuse they gave me was service got in the way or this happen at the hall. But the biggest excuse they gave was they did not like coming out to see him because they could not understand him or hear him. The MS had taken his voice away. We even had trouble understanding him. I would tell them please come out anyway he would just love to see you. You could do all the talking. No one. When the CO was in town maybe just maybe he would come out and see him. Even though my eyes was open to what the WT was and my wife and I was working on getting out this action by my so called friends made me very angry and upset. One day our dear friend died in our arms at home. We was in deep shock. And what happen only and I mean only One Elder came out to see us. I was furious. So we made arrangement for his furneral. Many poeple who knew him and us told me they would not be there. Why because there was the Dist. Convention that weekend. Even my brother told me that. I was heart broken. I saw the lack of love and could not believe it. During the furneral and after not one I mean not one person came up to us at the Kingdom Hall to tell us how sorry they was for our loss in losing a good friend. Actually many was befuddled on why we was so hurt. To us it was like lossing a child. Some did say to us will now that he is dead you can come back to all the meetings and field service. Like he meant nothing to us. If I had any doubts about the Wt. cult they was all gone. I will never forget the lack of love shown to us. Except by all the so called worldly people. All the nurses and social workers who came to the furneral. My wives so called worldly relatives also help out alot even by bring some food over to us and listening to us and consoling us. Not one so called witness friend did this. It was so baltant there lack of love.

    I have been wanting to tell this story for many years now. Now that I got it off my chest I can now put this to rest. When the Wt. cult talks about love. The only love they know how to show is how much money do you have to give or how many hours did you spend in field service. When it comes to basic human love and relationships they do not have a clue. Thanks for listening I hope this help any who are on the fence. Still Totally ADD

  • punkofnice
    punkofnice

    Some did say to us will now that he is dead you can come back to all the meetings and field service. Like he meant nothing to us. = STADD

    There is only conditional love in the watchtower® cult. It is as you say. The rank and file are conditioned only to think of giving power and money to the paedophile protecting Governing Body......and they don't even see it!

  • Reopened Mind
    Reopened Mind

    And this is one of the big reasons I left with my husband, Still Totally ADD.

    Reopened Mind

  • EndofMysteries
    EndofMysteries

    That reminds me of this JW whose worldly father died. I went to the funeral and only a few showed up. The JW whose own father died knew some worldly relatives were showing up. He did not speak one word about his father, he just did a preaching / resurrection talk. Could see there was no love for his own father there.

  • will-be-apostate
    will-be-apostate

    Well, I don't know what part of the world you are living in but here in Eastern Europe I could not imagine that jws would act like that. If one thing showing love, even if it's conditional, is still present.

    I'm sorry you had to go through that. The conclusion for me is that jws are not that united at all.

  • GrreatTeacher
    GrreatTeacher

    That is truly disgusting behavior. Maybe they held not making meetings or field service against the poor man. Who knows what goes on in their petty little minds.

    You did a good thing. Good to know there are truly caring people in this world.

  • rip van winkle
    rip van winkle

    Hi Still Totally ADD! Thank you very much for sharing this story. I'm very sorry for the loss of your son.It such a betrayal of your Cong., and any JW who make claim to be footstep followers of Christ and then show a lack of genuine love. I can understand the hurt, deep sadness and anger you experienced by their indifference. Hypocrites.

    You and your wife are absolutely wonderful people to have taken on so much. Genuine love. 15 years! You filled up so much of his life with love, concern, care and friendship that hopefully he didn't wonder where the Bros & Sisters were.

    I'm astounded.

  • NVR2L8
    NVR2L8

    Will be apostate...conditional love isn't love! If someone does good because he expects something in return, this isn't love. As soon as he realizes he's not getting what he expected he will drop you as a hot potato. There was an elder in my congregation who hugged and kissed me at every meeting. Since I left 4 years ago I haven't seen or heard from him except for a lame attempt of a shepherding call. So STADD's experience doesn't surprises me and I'm so sorry that he and his wife went through this ordeal with no real support and genuine love from the congregation. Having a district convention is a lame excuse not to attend someone's funeral...unless the deceased means nothing to you.

  • gma-tired2
    gma-tired2

    Your experience has been similar to my recent experiences. My fleshly brother died recently living in the same congregation territory he had since birth (62 years) true he left JWs as a teen but our sistter is still faithful and our mom was faithful to death. How many active JWs attended only 3 family member but many ex JWs and all his worldly friends.I loved the love shown by his true friends (mostly bikers.)

    Many of the faithful elderly in this area have had very poor attended JW fuereals.The excuse given I didn't know her or him very well. Enough of their excuses I don't want to hear how loving they are.

  • NotNew
    NotNew

    A very sad situtation...how many times has things like this been repeated?

    How can an organization that claims to be loving...not be?

    We've been through similar...with the good being it helped us escape from the mimd controlling tactics.

    SW

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit