Oral Sex! As viewed by the Watchtower, a Quote!

Beans

The Watchtower has some great articles for all JW`s to view!

http://quotes.jehovahswitnesses.com/oral.htm

Beans

the follower

there will probably be an article in the magazine saying that oral sex isn't fornication after all.

after all, the presodent of the united states did not even class it as sexual relations. he was one of the good one.

Beans

Notice how they keep refering to ANAL! Perhaps the Greek Brethren were not allowed there INPUT on the subject! It makes you wonder who really is ANAL on this topic!

Beans

myself

If you confess such actions, you can be sure that the elders must know:
Where were you at?
What positions were you in?
What were you wearing?/Were you wearing anything?
Did you scream my name?

D8TA

Of COURSE it always refers to ANAL...don't you see?

It's WT-speak, they are really trying to say in a "code" that they don't wan't the members feel like they are "getting it in the ass" by the governing body.

D8TA

I read on that quotes.jw's site that they were not against intimate kissing 'pre-intercourse'. So the distinction between an illegal act and intimate kissing has always been a source of deep confusion and guilt. Guilt? you ask? Why, yes. Since oral sex is just about the only thing that has ever worked for me, becoming a JW meant giving up sexual satisfaction. And forget manual stimulation by partner!! That would be masturbating if you climax. But if you don't clmax, well then, it's just 'touching'. So, who is to determine? I found out when the Elders wanted details in order to decide. Now they can barely look at me. (Besides my sordid sex life I'm a Bombshell, so I've been told.) I get a private chuckle at how I make them blush sometimes. And now that I'm almost 'free', they just don't know what to do with me. And the elders wives.....!!

SPAZnik

Brothers,

(*me whispering in a soft throaty voice) What is oral sex?

I really need to be sure
that I'm not sinning against Jah, so

pleeease I neeeeed you (*pleading throaty whisper)

to explain to me just what it is. I could never rent a video cuz you told me that wasn't a very good idea. (*me batting my wide-eyed innocence *blink *blink)

'Oral' has to do with the mouth right? (*blink *blink)
As in mouth, tongue and lips? (*me licking my lips,
nervously of course)

I don't understand, so do you mean like kissing is even bad?
Ooooh, just kissing 'certain spots' is bad.
Aaaah, not just kissing?
Mmmhmmm, Sucking and Licking is more the bad thing?

Just so I'm crystal clear on what I am and am not allowed to do
when i'm naked in my 'sacred' "marriage bed" tonight when copulating, *garsh*, I mean rendering my marital "due" with my spouse, please could you explain, where exactly my mouth (*me licking my lips) should draw the line?

So am I understanding this properly (*blink blink)
that I can kiss.
I can use my mouth,
tongue
and lips to
intimately
kiss
my mate anywhere...up and down...the length...of their...
.
.
.
.
(pause for emphasis)....
.
.
.
.
.
body, (what were you thinking?)
just so long as not directly on their *ahem*? So what qualifies as RIGHT ON the *ahem*? Just the tip? Or all over, what about that sensitive place under the **** and between the ****, you know, close to the um, ****? Sooo, are you saying that if I was ever to say, hold the *ahem* like 'so' and kiss up to say 'here' (*me gesturing) it would be okay, but if i open my mouth (*blink blink of my eyelashes) and let my tongue touch that sensitive *ahem* part, and especially if I wrapped my mouth right around it...licking or sucking...

(*me thinking "brother, is that a lightsaber in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?")...

...that would be an unnatural desire and just plain wrong?
(*blink *blink)

Ohhhh, so like anywhere up to, let's say, the *ahem*
hair line is off limits?

(*me thinking thank gawd i'm shaved!)

So I can touch...and ummmmm.....fondle anywhere with my hands, but not with my lips and tongue? So I can kiss right up to their *ahem* but not right ON it, night after day after night after day after night as long as I don't touch the reeeeally sensitive places with my tongue? (*me licking lips 'nervously' again)

(*me noting to self "cum to think of it, this sounds like a surefire way to get my grounds for divorce! i'll either bore and/or tease my mate into the arms of another just by following WTS rules!")

I'm embarrassed to say this
brothers,
but i must be sure
that I'm in no way sinning,
so What about my spouse towards me?
You know, the guy to the girl
(*me thinking or the girl to the girl)
I'm going to try and speak frankly here brothers,
after all we are all adults right...ok...*ahem...well,
no matter how um, you know, hot or wet I am during, um, intercourse, well um, my, mmmmmm...(*me whispering again) clit. doesn't really get stimulated much when he is inside of me, so what you are telling me is that neither of us should touch or kiss or lick, my soft sensitive god-given *ahem*???

So that's because???

oh it's uncleeeean! well, what if i'm in the shower and make sure i rub soap...and water...ALL over my...entire....um...
.
.
.
(pause for effect)...
.
.
.
(gesturing unconsciously,

mainly of course because gesturing
has been 'drilled into me',

me running my hands next to my)
.
.
.
.
.
.
body (what were you thinking?) to ensure it's clean?

ohhh, unclean in a figurative sense? but only mouth, lips and tongue to *ahem* is unclean, but what about hands to *ahem*?
(me thinking *hm. maybe that's where the pharisees rules about washing up to the elbows came from? possible they knew about fisting way back then?)

Oh and Brothers, why are YOU red-faced, if anyone should be redfaced it should be me, I'm the one who didn't know what it was. And,

Thank You Brothers, for staying out late after the meeting to help ensure my spiritual needs were met. And thank your wives too for waiting so late after the meeting too.

(*note to self - no giving head to the head of my Head. got it.)

ps - Brothers if THAT is what oral sex is,
and i find this hard to say, then there may be a need to form a judicial committee for me.
what's that? ohhhh, you don't like to get involved that intimately in people's marriages? just don't 'promote oral sex' to others? So are you now saying that making noise during sex is wrong? no? Oh, just telling anyone else that we're all doing it? Oh...ooookay.

(so the whole 'oral sex is unclean and unnatural' rule, is really a guilt thing, and if they actually were to 'enforce' it, they wouldn't have much of a cong left now would they? Are they really so nieve as to believe that just becuz they've guilted everyone into thinking it's 'wrong', unnatural and unclean, to the point that noone will admit to it, that the "vast majority find it repulsive and unnatural"? Oh yeah, that's right, and nobody masturbates either. LOL.)

time for another nap
(anything for my country)

SPAZ

Scully

OMG SPAZnik!!!!!!

you freaking just cracked me up!!!

Love, Scully

raven101

I read the whole thing (unbelievably), this is some of the first of their publication I have read since I was a witness. I did take notes in expectation of analyzing and discrediting their logic in this post however I have neither the time nor the inclination right now.

Suffice to say the logic is woefully lacking, apallingly so . . . they start with a premise that is beyond weak and the argument goes downhill from there, only someone already indoctrinated, bluffed, and bullied out of the capacity for critical thinking would swallow it (no pun intended).

I can only hope that if I had not been raised as a witness I wouldn't have been blind or ignorant enough to believe it, it's really just too weak for words. I am almost embarrassed for them, and I am seriously not being catty or rude.

raven101

butalbee

I hear the elders are really turned on my 'anal'.

Oral Sex! As viewed by the Watchtower, a Quote!

Beans

the follower

Beans

myself

D8TA

gypsyqueen

SPAZnik

Scully

raven101

butalbee

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