I'll start by saying, I'm a ministerial servant who is trapped in the religion. My wife is hardcore...but I've slowly been getting her to lighten up, so I'll take it! All my friends and family are JW's, and I am employed by a JW (who is actually a GREAT boss). I literally don't know ANYONE outside of the religion.
I'm at such a crossroads... I don't know if God exists or not. Am I atheist, agnostic, or a believer? I don't know.
God is not the author of confusion...but like Dan Barker says, 'Can you think of a single book that has brought about more confusion than the bible?'
And that's true! I can teach and PROVE, from the Bible, that the JW doctrine is true. I can also take that SAME book and PROVE that it is wrong. I can use the Bible to both PROVE and DISPROVE the trinity. etc...
But then I hear comments like: "Ignore the bible, only listen to the words of Jesus." And I think that is awesome. There's not too much of what Jesus said that makes me uncomfortable. He remained silent on some of the biggest issued being pushed by religion: gay rights, abortion, etc.
So, I'm confused and that's where I'm at right now. But here's the main point of my post:
For those of you who are now athiest: Do you ever look back and wonder "what if"? What if the god of the bible is real? What if there is a creator who is not the god of the bible?
I would like to free myself from religion...but it leaves such an empty void for me. You mean to tell me that my time with my super amazing and awesome wife (albiet hardcore) is limited? No paradise earth? No heaven? No afterlife? Did you have to get over this fact or was it pretty easy for you?
Thank you for your insight!
NOTE: Just to be clear, I'm not asking what I should do...I know that's different for everybody. I'm just curious to see if the things I worry about during MY transition are normal or not.
Also, please, I am at a crossroads and I'm not commited 100% to theism or athiesm. Please do not derail the topic and tell me why I should or shouldn't beleive. PM me if you would like. But I really don't want to see the topic fall into a flame war.
Thank you everybody!