To My Mother

by MrMoe 115 Replies latest jw friends

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  dubla

  moe-

  im sorry for missing this thread the first time around, (i just saw your other post today which alerted me to it).....i had no idea about your mother. i want you to know i was very touched and saddened by your post, and i really feel for what you are going through. i know the encouragement of others helps, but at the same time there is not alot anyone can say to truly help the pain....

  i lost my mother six years ago to a very rare disease (similar to cancer), and it was by far the most painful thing ive had to go through, and the pain is still there today, every day. i was very close to her, closer to her than anyone else on this planet, and i miss her more than words can say. on my parents last anniversary together (the year she died), the entire family got together (myself and my four older sisters) and us children all exchanged gifts with our parents. we knew she was close to the end, and it was a sad, tear filled night. my gift to my mother was a decorative book with the following passage printed on the open pages:

  What Mom Took

  Most often when we think of Mom we think of what she's given:

  The softness of a loving touch, a gentle guide for living,

  A nightly tip-toe in a room, An understanding look,

  But, sometimes when I think of Mom I think of what she took.

  She took a child and taught it how to live this life with pride,

  she took those kindergarten tears, and kept them all inside.

  She took the hands that longed to hold her child and not let go.

  Used them to push her child along the way, to thrive and grow.

  Took time to do some other things like sew, and clean and cook,

  and never thought to ask for thanks for all the things she took.

  Thanks, Mom.

  i saw that book in the store, and after reading the poem and crying a few tears, i knew it was the perfect gift..........and now it sits on display in my kitchen. i re-read it occasionally, and it still brings tears to my eyes, along with many wonderful memories.

  youll miss her amanda, always, and the pain will subside but never leave. im so sorry youre going through this.....you have my empathy and sympathy.

  aa

  Edited by - dubla on 26 June 2002 12:51:32

  Edited by - dubla on 26 June 2002 12:53:10
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  MrMoe

  Dubla,

  Thank for posting on the thread. Been feeling strange lately, still not sure if I have come to terms with her death. I miss her so very much.

  Today, seeing you respond, makes me realize why I have been so confused lately. It hurts so much you know. I want to pick up the phone and call her. I want to go over to her house and say, "Mom, I love you. Sorry for all the hell I put you through as a kid." But I can't because she is not there anymore.

  My mother is with me, in my heart, I feel her near me, but it is not the same. Just not the same.

  SIMPLE MAN ~ Lynard Syknard

  Mama told me when I was young:

  'Come sit beside me, my only son,

  and listen closely to what I say

  and if you do this it will help you some sunny day.

  'Oh, take your time, don't live too fast.

  Troubles will come and they will pass.

  Go find a woman and you'll find love

  and don't forget, son, there is someone up above.

  'And be a simple kind of man,

  oh, be something you love and understand.

  Baby, be a simple kind of man.

  Oh, won't you do this for me, son, if you can.

  'Forget your lust for the rich man's gold,

  all that you need is in your soul.

  And you can do this if you try.

  All that I want for you, my son, is to be satisfied.

  'Boy, don't you worry, you'll find yourself.

  Follow your heart and nothing else.

  And you can do this, oh baby, if you try.

  All that I want for you, my son, is to be satisfied.
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  MrMoe

  For both my mothers - because I lost the first one when I was 5 and the 2nd one when I was 25...

  I Will Never Be The Same

  So you walked with me for a while
  Bared your naked soul
  And you told me of your plan
  How you would never let them know
  In the morning of the night
  You cried a long lost child
  And I tried on I tried to hold you
  But you were young
  And you were wild
  
  
  But I, I will never be the same
  Oh I, I will never be the same
  Caught in your eyes
  Lost in your name
  I will never be the same
  
  Secrets of your life
  I never wanted for myself
  But you guarded them like a lie
  Placed up on the highest shelf
  In the morning of the night
  When I woke to find you gone
  I knew your distant devil
  Must be draggin' you along
  
  
  And you swore that you were bound for glory
  And for wanting you had no shame
  But I loved you
  And then I lost you
  And I will never be the same

  Talking To My Angel

  Don't be afraid
  Close your eyes
  Lay it all down
  Don't you cry
  Can't you see I'm going
  Where I can see the sun rise
  I've been talking to my angel
  And she said that it's alright
  
  I've always had to run
  I don't know just why
  Desire slowly smoking
  Under the midwest sky
  There's something waiting out there
  That says I've got to try
  I've been talking to my angel
  And she said that it's alright
  
  This town thinks I'm crazy
  They just think I'm strange
  Sometimes they want to own me
  Sometimes they wish I'd change
  But I can feel the thunder
  Underneath my feet
  I sold my soul for freedom
  It's lonely but it's sweet
  
  Don't be afraid
  Close your eyes
  Lay it all down
  Don't you cry
  Can't you see I'm going
  Where I can see the sun rise
  I've been talking to my angel
  And she said that it's alright

  Edited by - MrMoe on 26 June 2002 13:3:34
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  SYN

  Moe: It's bad enough to lose one mother, but two!!!!! (((((MOE))))))
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  MrMoe

  The bright side is, I have two very beautiful and two very loving people with me forever watching over me...
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  LyinEyes

  Thanks so much for the poems. It is raining today and I feel a little lost, I too lost my mother many years ago. I wish so bad I could just call her one more time , if only that. The thread about perfume got me really thinking about her and I dreamed of her last nite. I wake up feeling the lose all over again. But then I wonder if it is not a good thing to feel this way, I never want to forget her and I feel she is with me every day. I am not sure about the afterlife ,if she is an angel or not. I would love that to be true, I could imagine how happy she would finally be. I think she would be looking down on me and be so proud of my family and she would be laughing at all the crazy things my kids do. I miss all the things that might have been.

  Mr. Moe, I have wondered how you have been doing since your mom's passing, but I was afraid to ask . It is so painful , I know. But since someone brought it up, I guess it broke the ice for me to tell you , that I am thinking about you and your mom would be proud of how you have your life together. You seem like a very sweet and wise young woman. You are right, she will be in your heart forever and you will think of her everyday, I think that is our way of keeping them alive , at least in our hearts. Nothing, not even death, can break the bond between mother and daughter.

  Lots of Hugsssss Sweetie :) LyinEyes (Dede)
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  MrMoe

  Thanks so much for the poems. It is raining today and I feel a little lost, I too lost my mother many years ago. I wish so bad I could just call her one more time , if only that. The thread about perfume got me really thinking about her and I dreamed of her last nite. I wake up feeling the lose all over again. But then I wonder if it is not a good thing to feel this way, I never want to forget her and I feel she is with me every day. I am not sure about the afterlife ,if she is an angel or not. I would love that to be true, I could imagine how happy she would finally be. I think she would be looking down on me and be so proud of my family and she would be laughing at all the crazy things my kids do. I miss all the things that might have been.

  DeDe --

  If I was there I would give you the biggest hug. It is raining here, too. Never being able to hold my either of my mothers again or hear thier voices is so painful, but my first mommy I have come to terms with years ago, the other mommy I am still coping with.

  My 2nd Mom and Dad were married 51 years you know. And now, he is all alone. I have no idea how he is dealing with this, I truly don't. I cannot even begin to imagine the nights he must spend alone. Rips my heart out, it really does. When we talk he puts on a happy face, but I can sense his hurt. She was the love of his life. Good-byes are so powerful...

  Amanda

  P.S. DeDe - It is said to dream of a loved one you have lost in a good omen that something good is on the way, so perhaps your mother IS watching over you...
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  obiwan

  Moe I'm so so sorry.I've been there and know the hurt,my heart goes out to you and your children,if it helps I always try and smile whenever I think of my mother so I don't think about the passing so much.Hugs and kisses(((moe)))
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  zanex

  I am truly sorry for your loss...I hope that I feel as bad when my own mother passes...i kind of doubt I will tho. Whatever its worth...my condolences...if there is any small thing i can do just mention it...
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  patio34

  Dear Mr. Moe,

  I'm so sorry for your loss. It sounds as if you both were lucky to have each other. You're a wonderful daughter and were a source of much pride and joy for her.

  All the best,

  Pat