We are not df'd but have been inactive, not attended any meetings or conventions for 12 years. Some jws say hi, others are so concerned we might be df'd (not knowing anything about the "flock") they won't even smile at us....we smile and try to shake hands. Some skitter away afraid they might get spiritual leprosy.
Smiling at a Disfellowshipped JW instead of Completely Ignoring him
by ProfCNJ 27 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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Daniel1555
To smile at him I think is the least you can do.
Why not say "hello" or "hi" to him and don't care what others think?
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compound complex
The binding, restricting effect that this concern for organizational submission can have on person's minds was illustrated to me by an experience related by Robert Lang, then the assistant Bethel Home Overseer at the international headquarters. He had been transferred to a different congregation in the New York city area and he said that at one of the first meetings he attended there the elders approached him for advice. It seems that a young woman, the sister of one of the ministerial servants, was disfellowshiped and was still attending meetings. She had a small baby and brought it with her to the Kingdom Hall in a baby carriage. The Hall itself was on the second story of a building and the stairs were long and steep. The young woman would back up the stairs, pulling the baby carriage - with the baby in it - up the stairs as she went. The question the elders asked was whether it would be proper for the disfellowshiped woman's brother to assist her in getting up the stairs! Some thought so, others said, no, being disfellowshiped she should be considered as if she were not even there. To his credit, Lang said, "I don't know what the rule is on this, I only know one thing: if I'm around when she starts pulling that carriage up the stairs, I'm going to help her! When I think of what could happen if she were to stumble and lose control of the carriage ....'
The most frightening thing about this is that adult men did not feel they could be guided by their own hearts and minds in a circumstance so obviously calling for human kindness. The pressing concern for them was - not the danger to the infant's life - but WHAT THE ORGANIZATION POLICY ALLOWED in such cases [emphasis: RF]. They gave evidence of having become emasculated men in matters of ethics, of right and wrong.
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rjharris
I am a former JW of more than 30 years (disassociated). If I see a DFd JW, I would kindly speak with him and help him/her see that they should count it has a blessing not to be in captivity to ANY religious organization.
Christ meant for his disciples to be free and "unburdened." To express love and kindness to all persons - as he did - without restriction or browbeating.
As one who has disassociated himself from the WTBTS, it is I who view all JWs (as wells as persons membered with any religious organization) as innocent children tossed about by an overbearing parent. Children act and behave as their parent taught them. JWs in the congregations below are loyal to their parent: The Organization.
Loyalty to God and Christ are not really second place because they believe if one is loyal to "The organization" one is loyal to God and Christ. Yet, what has been forgotten and not practiced is the example Christ set towards persons of all sorts: He forgave them and would forgive them an unlimited number of times. Why? Because he knew that they "Did not know what they were doing."
Jesus showed the greatest expression of love towards those who who hated him, persecuted him, and put him to death: He ask the Father to forgive them. He did not punish them.
The practice of disfellowshipment is not from Christ. I can care less about what "The Bible" says. I care about what "Christ" said and did. And, he NEVER condemned, punished or rejected anyone.
It is men who seek to exercise power and control over "tossed about" mankind who seeks to condemn and expel - as if THEY themselves died for mankind. Christianity and all religion is a thief and has taken control of the Masters property and household. The Masters property is mankind. The religious systems do as they please with the Masters property - even taking ownership of it. Disposing of it as it sees fit. This is not loving.
Each life is precious in God's eye and the Master views each that he died for as precious, whether they accept him or not. This can be seen in him not condemning an adulterous woman who was condemned by the Scribes and Pharisees; this can be seen in him promising a condemned man who was not his follower, paradise; this can be seen in his resurrecting persons who were not his follower; and it can be seen in what hs did on behalf of his persecutors and executioners.
So who or what is this "thing" called by men, Christianity? It is an impostor. A counterfiet. A hater and controller of men. It is a cheat. It is a predator that runs in many wolf packs (denominations) that seeks to ensare mankind and once they ensnare them, devour (completely control) them.
Open your eyes people and look at what is in front of you. Get out of ALL of religion as that is not what The Most High sent His son into the world to establish. He sent his son into the world to as a "sacrifcial lamb" to die in behalf of ALL of mankind so that we not perish. (Notice that I did not say die because we all will die. Dying and persishing are two totally different things).
Look to the "Living One." No, he can no longer be seen and he does not exist in buildings of wood, stone and metal. He is a living spirit and the ONLY way we can sit ourselves before him in order to be taught by him directly is by exercising faith in him. Faith is a requirement for that which cannot be seen.
Faith should not be placed in humans or human agencies. Why? Because you can see them.
Faith should not be placed in a book - for example, The Bible. Why? Because you can see it.
God cannot be worshiped through things that can be seen. Why? Because he is a Spirit and Jesus says at John 4:23-24:
"Nevertheless, the hour is coming, and it is now, when the true worshipers will worship the Father with spirit and truth, for, indeed, the Father is looking for suchlike ones to worship him. God is a Spirit, and those worshiping him must worship with spirit and truth."
Sadly. most are attempting to worship God through visible things and their worship is in vain. To worship God in this manner is what religious organization seeks.
Yet, the Master - who is invisible - said of himself at John 14:6:
"I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."
So I say to all JW and those DFd: The practice of DFing is man-made and no person should buy into such labelings organizations arrogate to call others. Christ never called anyone disfellowshipped and never practiced such a thing. Reject such labels.
To accept such labels upon oneself shows a fear of men and what THEY can do to you. Those who use such expressions, shame on you! Who has made you to put off the love of Christ? Who is your Master? If Christ did not do such a thing, why are you?
Disfellowshiping is a cruel mind game and there is nothing loving about it. It is a tool used at the disposal of imperfect men to beat Christs slaves (all of mankind) to conformity to rigid human rules and regulations that Christ never established.
R. Jerome Harris
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ProfCNJ
Hi Compound Complex, what an eye-opener. I am surprised at the question raised by the elders. That's fanaticism at its best - strict adherence to WT policies that go beyond common sense and human conscience.
Ignoring the DF'd sister while she obviously needs assistance is like letting your young boy who does not know how to swim to go the swimming pool by himself, leaving him behind. After all, there are lifeguards around.
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compound complex
Good commentary, ProfCNJ!
I knew Robert Lang -- a good chap.
BTW, a belated welcome to JWN.
Hope you enjoy your time here.
Best regards.
CC
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blondie
*** w02 3/1 p. 16 How Precious Is the Truth to You? ***
Caring for Ourselves Spiritually
12 Our marriage mate or our parents can encourage us in the way of the truth. Likewise, congregation elders can shepherd us as part of the flock under their care. (Acts 20:28) But where does the ultimate responsibility lie if we are to persevere in our way of life based on the truth? Really, the responsibility rests with each one of us. And that is true both under normal circumstances and in difficult times. Consider the following incident.
13 In Scotland some young lambs were grazing in a pasture when one of them strayed to the side of a hillock and tumbled onto a ledge below. It was uninjured, but it was frightened and unable to climb back. So it started to bleat plaintively. Its mother heard it, and she too began to bleat until the shepherd came and retrieved the young lamb.
14 Notice the sequence of events. The lamb called for help, the ewe added her voice to its cries, and the alerted shepherd sprang into action to rescue it. If a very young animal and its mother can sense danger and immediately call for help, should we not do the same when we stumble spiritually or face unexpected dangers from Satan’s world? (James 5:14, 15; 1 Peter 5:8) We should, especially if we are lacking in experience either because we are young or because we are relatively new in the truth.
NOT
(Matthew 18:12-14) 12 “What do YOU think? If a certain man comes to have a hundred sheep and one of them gets strayed, will he not leave the ninety-nine upon the mountains and set out on a search for the one that is straying? 13 And if he happens to find it, I certainly tell YOU, he rejoices more over it than over the ninety-nine that have not strayed. 14 Likewise it is not a desirable thing with my Father who is in heaven for one of these little ones to perish.
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So the sheep have to call out, the shepherd does not have to know one strayed and go looking for it?
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etna
You shouldn't feel good about smiling at him. You should talk to him, he is a human being with feelings. Anyone can even smile at a dog and even pat a dog, but disfellowshipped persons arent even allowed to be acknowledged. What a CULT.
Etna
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objectivetruth
Etna - I was going to say the same thing.
I have a similar experience to relate, Recently my wife and I were in the supermarket, and we saw a Sister from our Previous Hall. We saw her, she saw us.. We smiled and walked towards her to say hello.. She quickly turned the corner and speedily pushed her shopping cart down the Bread Aisle. (Avoiding Any Additional Eye Contact At All Costs)
Hmm.. She may have smiled a tad, but if she did we didn't see it..
I suppose a smile is a start, but if you'd like to consider Jesus as your example, consider the fact that Jesus dined with a Prostitute and Tax Collectors.
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steve2
I've been known to look myself in the eye in the mirror and say, "My oh my Steve, you're one helluva nice apostate. You bring out the smile in me and I want to shake your hand."
I do draw the line at hugging though. I hear if you hug an apostate, the next thing they'll be living with you.