I just tried to look at the article in the Paducah Sun, online, and you have to PAY to see it. Good grief!
Marilyn (aka Mulan)
"No one can take advantage of you, without your permission." Ann Landers
Attn: More new stories in elder no show. hehe!
by aluminutty 21 Replies latest jw friends
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Mulan
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mrs rocky2
Mulan - we tried to look at it this morning too. It's $30 per year, $3 per month...didn't see if you could just buy an article like you can with the Seattle Times archives. If you have a fax machine I think we know someone who could fax you a copy.
Mrs R
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mpatrick
Bobsgirl,
Have I told you lately, I am so proud of you!
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Grunt
Just a little humor to help lighten the situation of the Society being a no-show at their own meeeting. This is making it hard on the average old Publisher as he or she tries to face people at work or school or out in service. Poor dubs.
The trying part is at home when you face up to all of that and talk about it to the guy/girl in the mirror. It might help convince him or her if you tell all about the latest little idiocy of the Boys at Bethel trying to df all the people whose conscience led them to protest out loud. They think they are still in a smoke filled room dealing with the old boys and they are in fact under a spotlight being taped live. A little of the fiction you love for any Witnesses reading this, this is probably much closer to the truth than the last magazine you put out to that unsuspecting householder.....Join the smalltown Brothers as they talk to New York... I can almost imagine the telephone conversation between the local elders and Bethel now:
Local Elder on phone to Bethel has FINALLY gotten to a G.B. Member:
We were gonnna disfellowship Bowen at the meeting like you told us but uh....... well,THEY have a bunch of people here and there are T.V. crews with cameras and lights and microphones! What do we do???
G.B. Member: Huh? Uh, how'd they know? How'd that happen? What did you do tell the world??? Uh, hold on, we will call you back. Until then, don't do anything. What ever you do, DON'T TALK to anybody. Click.
G.B. Member to rest of G.B. at emergency meeting: Damn it, WAKE THEM UP!!! All right, we've got a problem. Somehow those cornpone locals have screwed up the disfellowshipping. The media is there. It is time for the meeting, we have to make a move. Any suggestions?
Other G.B. Member: You did right telling them not to talk. They should never talk. Only WE should talk. Anyway we can get a soundcar down there with a recorded message and kind of blare it at the crowd as it drives by? Or maybe just send a taped message??? We used to do that a lot. Locals were too stupid to talk door to door so we just strapped a wind up record player on their backs and it weren't no ten pound job either! Back in uh, back in uh, don't let the colporters uh, too dumb, we do the......snore.
Other G.B. Member: Snore.
Other G.B. Member: Why when I was young man of forty serving in this very building and Rutherford was treated like God this would never have happened. Let's disfellowship the whole crowd, Shun the Bastards! They can't question us. By the way, anyone seen the nurse? This thing is uh, full. 'Less of course that ain't me, could be one of YOU letting me take the rap!.......ooh, uh, I gotta go. NURSE!!! Quick damn you it's running down my leg! Oh that was just drool from old Jar.....get your head offn me, get your .....snore.
Chorus of various G.B. Members who are awake shouting different things all at once: NURSE!!!! Get him outta here! Turn on the fans! Those fools at the farm can't make a good diaper! I say lets buy from outside, get them plastic ones! Hey, I need help too!...snore
Other G.B. Member: Man, I am glad he is gone. That smell makes me sick, even when it is ME. Hey what did you guys have for supper? Are your teeth fitting right??? Anyway, I uh, I uh, I uh, I uh, hmmm. Snore.
Other G.B. Member: How come I don't have the Jazzy??? How come I don't get the fancy chair??? Just cause I had a few accidents don't mean I shouldn't get a good chair too. I know some stuff! You are gonna hear about this uh, this here, uh, I uh, hey uh, hmmmm, snore.
Young G.B. Member: Uh, shouldn't we call back it has been a while now and uh, nobody has called the elder down there back, the media is waiting, it could be pretty embarrassing if we uh, don't do something. Hey shouldn't you all wake up and let's move on this thing? Nurse, could you hold on for a minute, NO don't do that to him in front of me it makes me want to puke! Look, I can't take this smell. I gotta go.
Other G.B. Member: Naw my teeth haven't felt right since we switched to that on property Brother/dentist. I say let's farm it out and go to a real dentist. I have had better teeth when they were made for me back in Guatemala during the, during the, during the uh, uh, uh. Anybody here uh ready for uh, uh, uh, ......hey, uh, nurse, I need a little help here. Good night boys, hope you get the uh, reports done or the books sent uh, I second it! snore.
Local Elder to other elders: I am sure this is being discussed with the full Governing Body and Jehovah's Spirit will see that whatever should be done IS done. Don't worry, the best minds in Jehvoah's Organization, the Faithful and Discreet Slave themselves are getting us the proper food at the proper time. We can't rush'em. We can't second guess'em. They are on a different wavelength and they are the Channel, never forget that. Jehovah's Ways are far above us. You can trust the Brothers at Bethel, probably talking to experts right now. Probably got brothers in the camera crews and at the head of the networks and just can't tell us. This will all work to our advantage before it is over with. Don't you brothers worry about a thing. We are privileged to be used by the Slave. Meanwhile let's just hope they all go away. I will call you all when I hear something. They probably have the legal team out, or they might be researching this and having to pore over some manuscripts that relate to the problem. They all speak several languages you know, what men, what Glorious Gifts in Men they are. Never doubt that Jehovah's Spirit is at work. I'll call when they call, OK? CLICK...(later to his wife) Honey, I have to call a lawyer tomorrow and see just what my personal liability in this is. I am starting to get a sick feeling that the local congregation is going to wind up holding the bag on this. By the way, if any of the other elders call or any in the congregation or any newspapers, I AIN'T HERE! Heck, lets not be. Let's go see your Mama. Won't she be surprised after all these years. -
Farkel
Grunt,
Now THAT was hilarious!
Farkel
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Will Power
Grunt, that snore looked and sounded like Abe Simpson!
LOL -
jst2laws
Hello aluminutty,
I saw many lambs roar the last couple of days. Bob'sGirl was one of them. They all deserve a hug and badge of honor.
Give that smiley little baby a hug too!
Insanity
Great to hear from you. Keep in touch here. You know, you can edit your post if you feel you may have revealed too much about yourself!
Just click on the page and pencil icon on the bar above you post.Jst2laws
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aluminutty
Jst2laws:
Ditto and done! Noah is one smily little baby, isn't he, that is when he's not biting his daddys nose? That's what he did when I gave him the big hug. He laughed, and made as if to kiss me, and then went and bit my nose. Times like these make a blind man like me wish he could see, if only to avoid being eaten alive <grin>.BTW, and I'm sure Tema's already covered this base for me, but, it was *great* getting to spend the evening with you guys. I hope we all can get together again really soon, Also, thanks for the beer. I'll save one for the next time we are all together. OK, I won't, but I'll buy some then, OK. <grin>
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crawdad2
thank you grunt,,,,,,,,that was an accurate summary of it all.
after reading crisis of conscience, and being in alot of kangaroo courts myself.......your summary of it seems pretty accurate to me........
i hope they get their new "diapers" soon....they are going to need them.......i think they should get some "cigars" too.........don't you think they would look good sitting around the table smoking cigars?.......it would probably make them feel more authoritive.
then they could write an article about how it's ok for them to do that......you know, sorta like incense or something....with a few bible verses to back it up... -
Cappuccino OC
Can anyone scan the Lexinton Herald newspaper article? I'd love to take it to a couple of the local newspapers here. Please