Teeeennnnnnn 'Hut
Lance Corporal Zev, Front and Center.
Sound of boots marching then loud stomp and silence
On behalf of the Corps of Truth and all the Emperors, Empresses, and other Senior Officers of of the Opposition Forces, I hereby commend you for your RECENT mission into the heart of Cult Territory where you conducted yourself in an EXPLERARY MANNER while SHOWING THE FLAG of Truth in waters to which it is both FOREIGN and OPPOSED demonstrating behavior which UPHOLDS and PROMOTES the HIGH standards of the CORPS! As a result of this solitary, unsupported and in your face KICKASS and TAKENAMES mission, I hereby give you this BATTLEFIELD promotion to Second Lieutenant PLATOON COMMANDER in the 3rd Battalion, 3rd Marine Truth Corps Cult Assault Division
withallincresesinpaygradeuniformsmedalsandspecialparkingaccomadationsthisrankentitlestheholderto.
May I be the first to Salute you, SIR! and I will see you later for drinks in the Officer's Club you Mustanger!
Playing of Truth Corps Hymn, snicksnack sound of rifles being tossed around as the new inductee is paraded and saluted by the assembled Apostate Army
ALLRIGHTYOUASSHOLESYOU"VEHADYOURPARADE!InCASEYOURFORGOTTHERE'SAWARON!
GETBACKINTHEGDTRENCHESWE'VEGOTAMAJORLANDINGTONIGHT!
Dismissed!!!
sound of Grumbling from back ranks as others run back to the front, PRIVATE FARKEL, is that you??? You eyeballing me again, Private??? Save that ugly attitude for the ENEMY!!! I'dhaveyouonyourFACEgivingmePUSHUPSFOREVERifitweren'tforthebigassaulttonight! damFarkelbeenupanddownthepaygrade,greatcombatMarinebutnotmuchofaparadegoundone,
tooGAWDdaminsubordinatethat'showhegotbustedfromGrandMarshaloftheGDApostateArmytobuckprivateintheGDCultAssualtDivisionbutdamifIdon'tpitythepoordamDUB
(thosescumbagmaggots)thatherunsinto as he will SHOVE the long Bayonet of Truth up their narrow minded cult asses, BUTTSTROKE'm with the M-14 of recorded cult history and leave their lying cult corpses with s WatchTower stiking outa one ear, an Awake out the other one and a songbook in their mouth. YOURHARDCOREFARKEL, now get outta here. Where's my Gottdamdriver????
sound of screeching tires. Farkel Salutes till car disappears...then mutters how'd Simon ever get so far so fast? Must of gone to the Academy, I bust my butt and HE gets the driver! Its all who you know and that Hoddy Toddy British Accent! Everybody has to have somebody to boss. Grunt, get your backwoodsalabama ass over here!
Grunt: Aye, Aye Sir!
Grunt (just a grunt in the Corps of Truth!)