Very well written, Terry.
Those, elders or not, who dare in secrecy to come take a peek in here, are in fact giving the first, timid, step in a long descent from the Kingdom of Fantasy into the realm of reality. And it hurts, it really hurts sometimes, because, the more you have invested a great deal of your life into this cult and its romantic/tragic ideology, and experiencing early doubts, can be devastating inside. And it can cause some to just dump their rage onto others, as if projecting in others who experience doubts the punishment they think it should be inflicted upon themselves.
Being here is taking the first step towards that descent, but it ends up in liberation. If you're reading this message, it's a matter of time. You **will** leave the Organization, sooner or later.
Eden