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thedog1

I've posted on and off here over the past year, but not much recently. Anyone who read my previous posts will know that I started learning all sorts of surprising things about Jehovah's Witnesses about a year or so ago, well, surprising to me anyway. I feel very sad now as it is getting harder and harder to go to meetings. I've been looking at the material for this week's service meeting which is all about proving 1914, and after reading both of Ray Franz's books and other information here and elsewhere, especially the new book released at the summer convention which copperfastened the 'overlapping generation', then I realize that for me, the game is up. I'm not sure what to do. My wife still believes it all, but has serious health problems which mean that she misses a lot of meetings, and has some psychological problems, brought on in part by being a witness most of her life. I can't get back to that place I once had, even not so long ago where I kind of still believed it all, even though I have had vague reservations for about ten years, before I had read anything about Ray Franz and all the stuff that went on in the '80's. I know that if I mentioned any of this to the bros locally then I would be out on my ear pronto. I was a serving brother up to not so long ago, but cited my family situation as a reason for jumping ship from that responsibility. I need to keep the illusion of being in still going for my wife's sake and lots of family involved. The truth hurts.

disposable hero of hypocrisy

Good to hear from you dog dude. Sorry to hear your missus is still suffering.

You're not alone in suffering for your family. You and I both have taken the long game, trying to keep peace for the sake of others. Inevitably for me, I suspect I'm getting close to the point where I can't stand it anymore and might have to take action.

At least you're not serving anymore, that's a serious load off, good for you!

humbled

The part of your post that struck me as saddest is not being able to talk to your wife.

The irony of "the truth that makes you free" is that you can not freely speak. You cannot free her with the truth about the "Truth".

I hope you can soon. I knew people like her, women mostly, who seemed to be sickened by the burden that was not "light".

NotNew

Sorry...but glad to hear ur waking up...I started to wake up in 2008ish. It took a bit for me to realize that I was indoctrinated from almost birth into this religion that is wrong on almost every teaching. I lived my life based on those teachings that were-are wrong. I would of changed my outlook and life decisions had I known they were wrong!

Most of them would change my status now...without the lost decades of time. At almost 60 I can't get them back however moving forward I am able to make better decisions. My wife is awake and was before me so it is easier for me.

One of the things I keep saying was "I know they had those things wrong...but they are still gods chosen religion" boy was I wrong, and glad I realized it!

SW

Crazyguy

Work on having the best life you can have, when I tried to talk to my wife all she did was run off and call the elders. We all know what the elders do, they tell you to put your brain back into your pocket and just go with the flow the faithful slave knows best. Stay away from them and as many meetings as possible and move on.

DesirousOfChange

The greatest revenge is living a happy and successful life.

Just do it!

Doc

DATA-DOG

I know how you feel. My wife and I don't have spiritual discussions.

I was defending myself to an Eldub once. We were discussing how I could know all the nu-light from personal study and without the GB. Of course he had no answer, but agreed when I said that if I ever had any more insights, I would keep them to myself to avoid stumbling others. He said that we have to be careful when speaking to the sheep. I steered the conversation to this point, of course.

I ended the exchange with," Isn't it odd that speaking the truth [referring to current nu-light] causes divisions in the congregation? You would think that speaking truth would have a unifying effect?" Again, no anwer. The facts that you have learned are not welcome in JW-Land.

I hope your wife gets better. As you fade and continue to really progress and escape ( if only mentally) the mind control, you may find an opportunity to help your wife.

DD

MissFit

Hang in there. Please let us know how things are going.

KateWild

I was a serving brother up to not so long ago, but cited my family situation as a reason for jumping ship from that responsibility.-thedog1

The fact you have stepped down as an elder is a step in the right direction. Well done! you need to concentrate on your wife now and just miss meetings with her, do something fun like go to a movie or out for a meal when you miss the meetings if she is up for it.

Kate xx

thedog1

Thanks for your suppport to all.

Data dog, you have it right when you say the nu-light causes problems and that elders are worried about the 'sheep' being stumbled. I have discussed some of these things with other witnesses, one was very cool about it as he has some of the same thoughts himself, but he is also no longer serving. When I discussed some of my concerns, particularly about the funding issue and the money grab by the org, with another still serving brother, he became anxious and I had to steer the conversation elsewhere. He is a friend of many years standing but even though he questions some things, he still believes the org is being used by Jehovah. So no dice there.

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