If you have been inactive for over a year can you get disfellowshipped?

by cognac 41 Replies latest jw friends

  • Vidiot
    Vidiot

    Inactives are already unofficially shunned.

    Since I'm of the opinion that the WT heirarchy wants to prune the size of the R&F down to a more manageable level, I'm sure that the suggestion of automatic DFing of, say, 1-year-plus inactives has been brought to the table once or twice.

    With all the shit going down recently, I'm willing to bet that increasingly irrational behavior out of WTHQ might include something similar; they may begin to officially view long-time inactives of at least having disassociating themselves.

  • Vidiot
    Vidiot

    Gregor - "We were going after people who were minding their own business..."

    I recently got a tip that a member of the local BOE in my town was that type.

  • 20yearfader
    20yearfader

    I was always told by my father an elder that as long as i didnt tell or proclaim that i was a witness it was really nothing they could do to me.

    it's somewhat complicated in your problem since you have a jw mate.

    the only solution i see is that if he doesnt see the light and wake up there is a real chance for you being dfed (or discoed) is what we called it in the 70s around here.

    Is to leave him or get divorced his loyalty is to the org never forget that.Do you want to be with someone who has you at number 2 and a crazy cult as number 1?

    Something to think about i hope he sees the light

  • blondie
    blondie

    Its been said here many times before, you can be disfellowshipped for anything three elders agree upon

  • KateWild
    KateWild

    The fact that your hubby is trying to rat you out is concerning. Hopefully you have a strong relationship, you're obviously still together after you left a year ago (same time as me approx). Perhaps you can ride this through and do regular things as a family every week that bring you all closer together. We had board game night ( monopoly), and we used to go swimming together too.

    Here is hoping you don't have to face the stress of a JC.

    Kate xx

  • poopsiecakes
    poopsiecakes

    I had been inactive for over a year in a different city where pretty much nobody knew me, certainly nobody identified me as a JW, and they came after me - I sat through a JC with 3 men I had never met before (technically I had met one of them once when I first moved out here but that was it). It took them an hour and a half with someone they didn't know to decide I needed to go, then I appealed based on my inactivity for over a year and the elders' complete lack of interest in me until they heard a rumor from back home. So a second JC with 3 more men I had never met before and that didn't go very well.

    Based on my experience, if somebody wants you out, they'll get you OUT. Had I known then what I know now, I would have refused the JC but I was still mentally trapped at the time and thought I had to go.

    So if you took your kids trick or treating, I would be surprised if your JW husband wasn't on the phone with the elders while you were out.

  • flipper
    flipper

    COGNAC- It's nice to see you posting back on the board ! Good to have you here ! You'll receive lots of support here with good advice like you've already received by these good people who have shared similar experiences in exiting the Witnesses. You know my story. My wife and me used to chat with you about 6 years ago when you were first having some doubts. Remember- I even talked with your JW husband one time ? Since my own two JW daughters aged 27 and 26 have shunned me for 11 years now - my wife and I kind of looked at you as an adopted daughter of sorts . If you ever want to talk we are still here, I'll PM you our phone numbers, O.K. ?

    In regards to whether elders may come after you or not- if you are on their radar with enough family or friends ratting you out- believe me, they'll come after you if you are perceived as a threat to the congregation- or even if your HUSBAND perceives that you are a threat to HIS " spirituality " - he may be the one to get the ball rolling against you without even telling you beforehand ! That is what my JW ex-wife did to me 8 years AFTER our divorce ! I had been out of the Witnesses as an inactive person for over 3 years- and she sent elders 80 miles out of her area to rat out me and Mrs. Flipper who were about to be married ! I was scripturally free - but she had a vendetta to settle with me and sicked the elders on me. I eventually had my DFing overturned and won my appeal - but it caused much anguish in Mrs. Flipper and my life for about 10 months being harassed by the elders, i.e. phone calls, uninvited visits, and threatening certified letters to come to a JC meeting.

    Here's the deal- it may be that your dad having been a long time elder in your area there has worked out some kind of a " deal " with the fellow elders there where he has asked them not to " harass " you and who knows ? - you may be like teflon - they may not bug you. This happened to my 38 yr.old niece when her first marriage to a JW broke up and her dad, an elder, my brother in law - stepped into her situation and kept the elders from DFing her, even convinced the elders to " let it go " so my niece didn't have to attend ANY JC meeting. So it gives you something to think about. If you are NOT SURE that you are teflon or untouchable though - I would not assume anything. I'd still be extremely careful- especially since you are still with your devout JW husband. I don't know if he's more devoted to the JW cult or you- it's something you know better than most of us for sure. But your relationships could go to hell in a handbasket with your other JW relatives real fast if your hubby decided to get overrighteous on you feeling he needs to teach you a lesson with elders harassing you. These are all things YOU have to figure out in which way you want your life, and more importantly where you want your children's life to go. Is it more important to keep the family together for them to have a father who will be harshly overbearing forcing JW beliefs on them - and you being the go between and mediator between your kids and their dad- or do you cut your losses in time and make a new life for you and the kids ? I'm sure you've thought long and hard about your options- all I'm doing here is giving you the various entities that are involved and the decisions are solely yours to make. No atter WHAT you decide we and others here will be here for you as a support and pffer our friendship, O.K. ? I'll PM you our phone number. Mrs. Flipper sends her love. Feel free to call anytime

  • flipper
    flipper

    COGNAC- You have a PM, please check. Thanks, Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • kaik
    kaik

    Absolutelly, you can be DF for anything they decide to. Even to disagree with small changes of doctrine based on the older literature or momentary explanation will get you DFs quickly. JC does not need to prove anything. If they want you out you are out and there is NOTHING you can do. In Czech Republic they use traveling elders who are known as executioner squat and they brag how many apostate and innactive people had DFs. I have heard about attempt DF someone who was innactive. Older lonely woman who never married and never had children. One of these who are available after Armageddon. She suffered some medical condition and was in and out of nursing home or so, and stopped attending to meetings for long time until people forgot about her. Once DO mentioned to reach out people who were innactive to find out what are their standing in the organization or get them DFs if they did not return. To the suprise they find out that this old woman was for a while dead and buried at the city expenses. There was still debate in the KH if she was JW until her death or she left organization before and should be DF post-mortem. Elder wife said that the woman was never good christian and probably not eligible for resurrection. I do not know if they privatelly DFs but since she was gone and buried in pauper grave without any relatives around, they did not care about annoucjing it.

  • Fisherman
    Fisherman

    No.

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit