by MissFit 22 Replies latest jw experiences
Legacy: I like that. It does not sound as judgemental.
I think I was reacting to the judgmental attitude without realising it.
I wanted my mom to concentrate on the positive aspects concerning my niece.
She was so focused on the not being married part that she completely overlooked the long term commitment my niece sharedc with her partner.
There is a difference too in being "Judgemental" and making a judgement. Your judgement is that the decision your niece has made is not a bad one, it may not be what you, or I, would do, but overall it is not bad, not doomed to disaster. That is a judgement, an assesment of the facts.
To say the decision is wrong because it is not for you, would be judgemental.
That is the problem with the JW mindset, they are right, and their is no room for an alternative opinion to be as valid as theirs.
It is their way, or it is wrong.
You cannot get much more judgemental than that.
This attitude also takes away from the JW the ability to have empathy, understanding and to exercise compassion, it estranges them from the people they are judging.
Phizzy: thank you for that clarification between making a judgement and being judgemental.
You said : "that is the problem with the JW mindset, they are right, there is no room for an alternative opinion to be as valid as theirs..it is their way or it is wrong."
I think many other people tend to have that mindset as well.
You can see it in some's attitude toward same sex marriage , evolution, politics.
Miss.Fit
@MissFit,
I've managed to keep that in mind in my life....we all are judgemental to some degree...I love milk chocolate...but really don't care for dark chocolate...so should I judge others that like dark chocolate, just because I don't like it...but I do understand why some prefer it over milk chocolate...JW's of which I am one, have opinions on any & every thing. Even if they are not asked...They are the judge, jury & hangman of people.
Many folks don't approve of couples living together, but who are any of us to say what is right & wrong....whatever each of us does in this life, good, bad or indifferent, there are consequences..good, bad or indifferent....
Stay open minded in life...listen more...talk less....
Legacy
on another note, if they never get married they can never be accused of adultry.
sex between two concenting adults who love each other, and hurts no one. to me in not a sin.
plus, we are not under the law of moses.
Legacy: great advice: listen more talk less.
@sowhatnow...
I know that to be true...but for real...is sex between two adults ok, for real...wow, I really didn't know that....I thought it was ok with humans but not with God....new light for me....But I thought with all this stuff going on in the world...did God really have time to be bothered with folks who sleep with one another...I thought/think he has his hands full with more important things, like famine, drought & pestilence....murder & mayhem...
@Missfit...yep, I had to learn that....I now know it's useless at times to try to help anyone or give your opinion & or advice...Folks do what they want, when & where they want to...When it comes to being a witness, I found it best to just listen & nod or just say...Thanks Sis or Brother...I took to Jehovah in prayer, because that's all they'll say to you...basically they are saying...I'm too busy to help you...I got to make some hours so my field service slip is acceptable...
Legacy
Legacy,
I can see that a lot of my viewpoints and judgements have changed this past year.
I lol when I read your comment about God & his interest in our sex lives. I just had an Ah ha moment about that's few months ago.
Why indeed would God be do invested in who anyone had sex with?
You can talk about the effects on society and families. But why would God care?
double post.
@MissFit,
Things do change so fast, phones, Technology, you name it...it's no wonder why folks are crazy...things change all the time..once you buy a phone, you haven't even paid for it before the next one comes out..Same as the org. you finally wrap your brain around 1914, whammoo...they change it...I think God kind of cares who we sleep with for a few reasons...none of which humans can really understand...I feel this way...when you sleep with someone they are sharing their selves with you...some folks can sleep with someone & just forget about it..& move on to another person, some can't. God cares for us & in the end someone always gets hurt...So I don't think it's so much he is concerned who you sleep with but he's like our parent...he doesn't want his children to get hurt...one always falls in love & the other is just playing...so God sees all that...just like a parent does. I talk to males all day long about this ....but how I get them is when I say...well, just think how you would feel if someone slept with your adult child & really didn't want a relationship..I would you re-act...So I see the bigger pix of why casual sex can at times have a snag... Life is nothing more than...The Golden Rule...basically don't do to folks what you wouldn't want done to you. As far a judging...if you don't want to be judged...than, basically, keep your opinion to yourself...Example, you walk up to someone & comment on their outfit or not even a stranger but someone you know...you say, I really don't like that outfit...well, guess what? You have opened up the conversation where the person can chime back...I don't like your's either...Doesn't Jehovah say not to judge because you will be judged as well, & guess what ? There is a period behind that statement...it doesn't say, don't judge a person but only .....no buts...clear as a bell...Seems religious folks soon as they go to a place of worship, they start to judge...
Legacy
