"You have to find out her fears and exploit that. What is her worst fear?"

cognac

Literally, a text message to my husband from one of his "friends". He also wrote, "it's in her hands. It's her move now. Whatever happens, she brought this on herself. Just do what you know is best. If she fights you on it, who cares, do it anyway. Threaten to tell her parents.

My husbands texts about the elders comments, "Yeah, they also said I have grounds for separation if I needed it. They also mentioned divorce. But to put that in her hands."

He told this friend of his that I threatened to move out of state and take the kids. Really, he's getting me excommunicated so I have no reason to stay here anymore and told him I wanted him to come with me. Also, I wouldn't just take them without making sure it was legal anyways.

Anyways, I'm completely LIVID and don't know what to do. I feel like getting a restrainning order against this friend of his. What an a**h*le... :(

NeverKnew

Exploit your fears?...Cognac, can you imagine what HIS significant other would be dealing with? ... "Threaten to tell her parents?" Are you guys in your early 20's?

With friends like that, your husband doesn't need enemies. Going through a divorce ain't easy whether you're the person in the right or wrong. Don't reduce your standards of right and wrong nor bow down to the same level of immaturity.

Balaamsass2

Hang in. Get an attorney. IF there is agreat female Attorney she may work harder for you.

minimus

i agree. Get a lawyer. Know your rights and be confident that elders do not like being dragged thru the legal system if something can get messy.

poopsiecakes

good lord...

the girl next door

Start poisoning the coffee

Hortensia

good lord indeed

Ocean1111

Exploits their fears. Bethel FEARS JWs calling in "worldly authority", thus so do JWs. So yes get legal advice, JWs seem to fear doing things legally. Then they cannot get you in a checkmate that lack of legal understanding may enable, that the Bethel predator teaches to JWs how to do, when you are always the "bad guy".

Keep it legal, know your rights, get an expert at it, and you got the drop on any JW or Bethel play. Remember, the word "lawsuit" will turn an elder white in fright of "reproach" that they already defend by definding lawless Bethel. (I would avoid the cops though, just get a lawyer's advice first, imo. In fact try a few lawyers, they differ in intelligence and insight legal and otherwise);

truthseekeriam

I agree, good lord!

Look, the truth is.....your going to be the bad guy for a while, life is going to be hell for a while.

I know its completely overwhelming right now because everything is all happening at once but try to think of it as a band-aid being ripped off quickly.

In the end you are done with these wacko people and on your way to a new life.

Just be glad you see where your husbands alliance is now, instead of 10 years from now.

I have family members stick in loveless marriages completely misrable all in the name of being a good little JW. It's completely ugly with no end in sight.

Just try to look past this ugliness and into your future.

goingthruthemotions

i agree, go see a lawyer and a counseler. it sucks to have mates who choose the borg over there marriage!

GTTM

"You have to find out her fears and exploit that. What is her worst fear?"

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